A green eyed monster within, in behaviour satan's akin. Other's possessions are his attraction, flies on wings of dissatisfaction. Hopes more for other's loss than his gain, can take ugliest of forms without constraint.
I watch the chatter of long time friends The jealousy's blooming It will never end The thing that's always been there that refuses to let go This ***** named jealousy is the only friend I know.
I'm sorry I'm never okay Sometimes I try but it's just too much Im bipolar in my spite Leaning in favor of the usual heavy nights I don't want to be this way Drowning in self hate and craving pity I don't know who would want this I'm ashamed of everything I want I'm ashamed of who I am Sometimes I marvel at how thick the mask I put up is I even trick myself into getting close to self love Of course then I breakdown and realize how horrible I am It can only last for so long I never think of my self as suicidal Because I couldn't actually commit it I can't commit to anything But I constantly think how amazing it would be to just be done with it all I want to be done with everything I crave a day when it's easy to breathe and I'm not terrified of everything and everyone When someone asks what's wrong with me I never really know how to respond