everywhere i turn you're standing there
reminding me of why you left and why i will never be good enough for you

this is all whispered to me in your seductive voice and through your champagne pink lips that could get me drunk at any hour
I only dream that I could make you smile the way you do when she's around
(your smile could light up a whole room full of people)
and that I would appear in your dreams the way you do in mine

but the thing is, in my dreams about you I wake up with tears in my eyes and I almost feel as if I'm going to suffocate
my heart feels like it's been shattered in to a million pieces and I then am reminded of how it felt when you left me (the first time)

basically what I'm trying to say is

it's been 1 year, 4 months and 16 days since you left me
and everyday I stare at my phone waiting for a message from you, but it never comes

*i miss you

the same **** routine every day
i am so bored
bored with myself
engulfed by the normality
controlled by the system
I ask everyone
"Doesn't it get old?"
they say 'no, you have to make the money somehow'
but isn't life meant to be more than this??
Where is the fire in everyone's eyes
i wanna see flames!!
i wanna see passion for God's sake!!
give me hope
that i will not lead a boring life
because i'm scared to death about what the future
and beyond paranoid that i will grow up and amount to nothing,
look back on my life and regret the times i did as i was told

so i tell you
i want to live,

just not like this