He got up when everyone was sitting down,
From a hot country to a cold one.
The coldness blocked off his pain to return again.
His dad’s friends were echoing, what a lesson.
I should have been paying much closer attention.
I just felt his pain at a closer dimension,
What else was said that he didn’t mention?

Dejé huellas en una pared a la que quizás nunca volveré.
Abuelitos se aseguraron de dejarme cada palabra necesaria para sobrevivir sin ellos.
Al principio no procesé que cada abrazo y regalo era un presagio del futuro.
¿Como podría olvidarlo?
Adormeciendo su existencia durante años;
caminando por un camino que estaba lejos del de ellos.
Mientras escribo, uno se detiene y uno continúa.
No sabía que cada palabra era un enigma, de lo contrario habría hecho más preguntas.
Pasos, uno se detiene y uno continúa.
Los dejo ir todos los días para seguir entendiendo los pasos.

I left imprints on a wall I, perhaps, will never return to.
Abuelitos made sure to leave me every single word necessary to survive without them.
At first I didn't process that every hug and gift was a foreshadow of the future.
How could I forget?
Numbing their existence for years;
walking down a road that was far from theirs.
As I write, one stops and one continues.
I didn't know every word was a puzzle otherwise I would have asked more questions.
Steps, one stops and one continues.
I let go of them everyday to continue to understand steps.

I always wondered the concept of existence.
Mamita made sure to show me.
I watched her get ready in her orange suits while everyone yelled “chocho” making sure she was seen.
I smiled swirling my dress yearning to be as fabulous like her.
Existing to her was obvious.
She took me in and that was enough to know I belonged to the family.
I still question why she chose me but wasn’t I lucky?
Existing in her eyes as family.

Abuela's eyes taught me so much,
She didn't have to say much just look at me.
She would often tell me tales that one day sounded like fantasy
and eventually turned into reality.
I froze at the age that many started to walk.

To unlearn what I once learned even if to others I was a "misfit".
Did not expect me to become the norm or what the entire world once predicted.

Her eyes were a piece of heaven that are no longer on earth.

Many knew her for her kind gestures but I knew her for her secret.
She felt like she could give to everyone and never noticed what I noticed most, her eyes.
so simple yet so mystic.