Withering breath                Time slows down
Her eyes feel cold                  Not searching for reason
The curls in her hair uncoil               Once gold will soon be rusted
Her mouth quivers as I touch her cheek          One more kiss is all she wants.
Looking back into her eyes I see her final moments of beauty.
Pale skin shines under the silver moonlight.
A gentle breeze brushes by           She shakes        I hold her closer.
Soft beat of her heart wants to race next to mine but instead gets weaker.
She wants to cry but the tears refuse.
I lift her chin up towards mine. Eyes closed
She stopped breathing when our lips finally touched.



Epilogue:

I never felt so much blackness fill me before.
Even the silent chill of tonight couldn't reach me.
I was freezing in my own thoughts.
My breathing became a faint memory.
Sound disappeared along with her.
The tears were quiet.
I didn't bother to brush them off.. they left frozen trails along my face.
The bleakness was broken by a hard object cocking.
I looked down my hollow life, I held her steady
While looking forward into the distance.
The trees were naked and shivering;
They were so beautiful at night.
I leaned backwards as
Lighting struck down in front of me
My head landed on the iced earth
with a dull thud. I couldn't really feel anything after that.
But I did taste the metal... and the rust.
I lay there with her still wrapped in my arms.
Together to the end.

The tender swells carry me 
But never disturbs.
Kept afloat with the meager thoughts of existence
A wave collides against the back of my head.
I fall victim to a surge.
I plunge down, submerged, by the wrathful hands of Poseidon. 
Shooting hard into my throat 
Sea salt scrapes for something.
Choking I reach out and struggle
One eye sees in red same as the eyes staring back.

No point of reference I simply sink. Deeper.
Deeper. Down the depths. 

With what light that does pierce down this far I gaze
At the glorious expanse of unknown cities.
Hovering above a void, a wild spectacle distracts me.
Pillars holding statues. Bridges spanning miles.
Prairies full of green and red. And massive graveyards in honour of those of whom are worthy of such a burial.

There the void becomes something more.
Air has pushed through my eye sockets I have drifted down so deep.
I want to shake but the freezing water weighs down on me so much.
I am not blind from near death but from complete extinction of light.
I realize I wasn't swimming at all. 
A clutching hand has dug its nails into my now broken ankle. Delivering me
To a place I have always wanted. A home.
Here no one can evict me from what is rightfully mine. 

I am free
I am dead
I am gone
I am home

Why must I live in a world 
plastered with a facade of sincerity? 
The imitation of promise... 
is only a promise for a broken future. 

I keep my thoughts from spilling 
across pages and from others. 

But my actions cannot be withheld. 

Sleep has become more of a haven for me 
- where the nothing cannot touch me.
 
It never stops... the thought of who I am. 

Am I any different from the rest? 
Am I merely an empty vessel? 
If so the only difference between me 
and the rest is I am well aware of it. 

I stand hollow, but without noise.

Three years.....
That's how long it has been.
Three years ago I knew who you were.
Now, today, I look at you suppressing all the noise
Buried deep inside.
The joy, the pain, the confusion. The hatred.
You look just as beautiful as you ever have. Poised.
Everyone else just falls completely out of focus for me,
but no one knows that. Not even you.
You must think it was all long ago.
I still remember. Everything.
The last three years have been a vacant blur.

It amazes me how I keep it all in when you're here in front of me. Smiling.
I don't know where it is coming from. Or how to take it..
Is it effortless sincerity or a polished and innocuous procedure?
I don't dare ask.

It's not until you walk away after turning back once more for a goodbye
Do I let my eyes flood over.
Do you have any idea? Anything remaining?
Why do I still? That's three years of my life I will never have back.

It amazes me to find I am still standing after what I have done.
This whole time.. I realize I am the one who hurt me the most.

Grains of sand still fall the same as they always have.

What is there left for me? My loved ones are gone. Happy. Dreaming.
I am still here. Spinning. Grieving.

Is this some act of god? If so, when will this punishment end?
When can I look in the mirror and see a familiar face?

Fingers carefully pressed against the lips
A sign to be still and quiet
She has something in mind
Can't be bothered with your words

Skin tightens when she searches with her
Hands running down and her teeth sinking in.
Eyes rolling back to the top, no matter
How hard you try to look down; you just can't.

Chest rising, falling
Rising, falling
Never can catch your breath when she
Goes on top and takes control.

She holds you down in satisfaction as you
Beg for more. Finally have a chance to
Open your eyes. She is nowhere near
Done with you, the night hasn't even started.

Don't lose yourself.. until she says so.

Unknown, "It sounds like the end of the world, but in a completely peaceful way."

Me*, "When that moment comes...
even through all the noise or lack there of...
it will be peaceful.

I don't think we will even remember it."