i met my seventh lover
seven months and
seven days
ago.
seven years
will pass
before his scent
sheds from my
skin
and seven lives
will have been lived
before i love
again.

I realized it was not your job to keep me afloat, so I stopped looking for places in conversation where you said something shallow and I tried to add depth. I stopped saving the text messages you sent past 3 AM because those words were not formed with love for me to cling on to, no, they were baited lines waiting for me to bite. Hook, line, and sinker I surfaced gasping for breathe in unfamiliar air. Writhing around in my discomfort, hoping you would throw me back into the water rather than watch me struggle. They never tell you how many fish in the sea are actually sharks waiting to sink their teeth.

I've tried to write a hundred poems
since the day you left.
I've tried metaphors and spoken word,
But it seems that all I have
Is books filled with i miss you's
And a title i feel sad
How do you put in words
The empty feeling of this bed
Has there been named a word
For craving something that's not mine
I don't know what the fase is called
Between ****** up and fine
I know it's not depression
Humiliation, suffer, rage
The poem to describe this
Would just be an empty page

Dark and full of doom
Yet miracle prone.

Everyday in the office
I fix broken bones.

I piece back together
What gets carelessly torn.

Precisely placed sutures,
So skin is reborn.

Racing against a clock
Trying to never lose.

Feelings aren't relevant,
They scientifically can't bruise.

Each day a new patient.
Each day a new story.
Each day a new surgery
That most would find gory.

But when you've shut out feelings
For the most part of your life
It's easy to patch up others
Whose bodies have seen strife.

Fixing broken bones
The curer of a heart.

Fixing others while I'm broken

Is a complicated art.

Are you happy now,
that I've figured out I was just a victim,
in a game of lies and lustful tension?**

My love, try to understand me when I say you torture me.
Your lips they beg for me to get you alone.
I want you to know it's the sway of your hips.
You taste so sweet cruel temptress.
I'm at your feet.
I can tell by the way you move that you want me to want you.

Are you happy now that I've figured out I was just a victim?!
In a game of lies and lustful tension?

Your lips they beg for me to get you alone.
I want you to know it's the sway of your hips.
You taste so sweet, cruel temptress.
I'm at your feet.
I can tell by the way you move that your want me to want you.

Are you happy now that I've figure out that I was just a victim?!
In a game of lies and lustful tension?

I can't believe I fell for you!
I was wrong, I am so confused.
A foolish mistake!

I gaze across the chasm that divides me from her, my prize.
And drink in her beauty.
I let the heady aroma of perfume riding on the hot wind saturate me.
I train my ears to the creaking of the bridge spamming the gap to her.
I throw caution into that wind of passion and continue down the path.
The path to the unknown.

I'm losing control and I want all of you.
I ache to swallow you.
I'm losing control, you're body screams for me, it's destroying me!

I can not resist the temptress of the night!
I'm coming for you!, I want you, I need you!
As the earth quakes I will deflower you!
Oh how my head swims, oh how my heart yearns!
I'm coming for you!
Our flesh will become one and we'll never speak of what we've become!
It's what you want. I'm gone! I'm gone! I'm gone!

So it seems that we were nothing.
I'm giving up!

Are you happy now that I've figured out that I was just a victim?!
In a game of lies and lustful tension?
I can't believe I fell for you!
I was wrong, I am so confused.
A foolish mistake.