For decades of pain have nailed it shut
Each heartbreak, each betrayal is represented by a nail driven so deep into
the wood of the window that it cracks.
Every tear shed is dripping like the morning dew slowly across the pane
The glass is thick yet fragile
The paint has all but faded away
To open it would take an army

A mass of males to move this mighty mountain
Yet you expect it to fly open so easily, with a gust of summer wind
For all the vulnerability left in me to be shed, open to all
Ripe for the picking
I wonder, is your window that easily opened, or is yours so guarded
that no one will ever even be able to view it or gaze into.

Over time you have been allowed to view the beauty and decay that exists on the other side.
Even got to slightly open for a moment
Do I even hope for the key to unlock it
To open it to the world
To open it to hurt
To seek the unknown ahead
I may never know, I may never be brave enough to even try

But its so sad to think, that it may have opened to you, and you alone
But fear made you flee
Never to see

At first a slow, meek wind begins to gently wisp through my hair
Caressing my skin, smoother than velvet, faster than light
Faster and wilder the wind begins to dance with the trees
Swaying to and fro
Lifting the leaves into a flowing sea of color
Clouds move in and blot out the sunlight
Darkness is moving freely into the land
Casting a cold shadow over all it passes
Lightning shoots through the shadow
Illuminating the world in a flash
Thunder shakes the ground
And opens the soul to a miracle of nature
Until finally a shower of cleansing rain pounds the earth
Rinsing away the dirt and sins of the day

Through the eyes of an artist the world is transformed into a magical place
Nothing is as it seems
The only limits are within a dream
But if their world becomes mundane, the darkness seeps in
Running like a hamster in a wheel
So fast, so hard but going nowhere
Every day chores start to cloud the mind
Mindless zombie moving through life
Reliving the same day over and over
The beauty and magic fades away
Work, Home, Sleep
Work, Home, Sleep
Stuck in the twilight zone of routine life
Slowly becoming blind to the mirage of wonder each place or experience may offer
Existing not Living
is a death sentence to an artist of any kind.

To the average eye or ear
The click clicking of my keyboard maybe dull or bland
But to a creative soul like mine it becomes a symphony.

As I sit and type
In my mind I am transported to a grand hall
Full of people and musicians
And as my hands glide gently over the keys
I become the composer

Fast and Slow
Loud and Soft
The sound echoes in my mind and through my heart

To find joy or even inspiration
In such a mundane task
Is truly the gift of writing and being
able to see small beautiful moments
in this world.

Woe is me.
Desperatley searching for a savior to rescue thee.
Patiently waiting for years upon years.
Days spent dreaming of who he may be.
Wandering aimlessly down empty streets.
Peeking around every corner hoping one day we shall meet.
Every stumble, every fall
My hand reaches up toward the heavens
Longing for a strong gentle hand to lift me from the hollow ground.
The tower in which my heart is locked away, reaches so high
no knight could possibly climb
My ballad of love falls on deaf ears
cursed by the evil queen desguised as hope
unable to wake
because true love's kiss
may not exist

At the end of a long dirt road
Hidden in a jungle of wild grass and weeds
There is a stone path encircling an ancient oak
Hugging and holding to her roots for dear life.

Forgotten stone that once held a purpose
Left to rot and decay
Once lead to a large regal home
Once lit by fireflies dancing in the warm summer breezes.

Walked on over the ages
By children, grandchildren, and friends
As time passed the home became abandoned and eventually burned to the ground.
But the stone path still remained.

A path to nowhere
So sad and lonely
All reason extinguished from present day
No longer useful
No longer pristine
No longer needed
Just existing
A part of a lost past, that will never be rebuilt

Thoughts, worries, dreams, and hopes
All running faster than lightning through her brain.
A constant stream down a raging river.
Twisting and turning, moving faster and faster
Every failure, every painful memory weighs so heavy it begins to crush what is left of her heart.
So many bricks she made over the years to build this wall around her true self.
The window to her soul has been nailed and painted shut.
Fear was the motivation
Fear of rejection, fear of loving without love in return
The fear if she became vulnerable or open that another heart break would **** her.
This internal struggle is her undoing
Compound with the worry of life, the pain to see the disappointment in her child's eyes.
The tears because she is too young to understand how cruel this world can be.
So helpless yet expected to be stronger than steel.
So in the light of day she hides the agony away.
Blocks the darkness of depression from her face
But in the solitude of the silent night, it bleeds through her skin, takes over her mind.
Until it consumes her soul, no rest, no easy escape
She wrestles through the hours of the evening
Only to wake over and over alone.

Funny how a building with four walls made of brick becomes a home.
Becomes almost like a member of your family
The memories seep deep into the paint
Hopes and dreams fill the air in every room
Every tear shed, every laugh shared, every scream in anger, every lonely evening, all bundled up and all that will remain
Now after almost 8 years my home is being taken away
After fighting for a hopeless marriage, surviving a ugly divorce, and the worry for this single mom, its all being snatched away.
I tried my best but no help was offered from this cold world, of banks and money and power.
Where I am only a number, not a person
They don't seem my struggles, they don't seem that I have spent my life trying to help my fellow man, regardless of the pain it may cause
All that is left are boxes of card board line the walls
Every photo removed
Every memory packed away
Every mark on the door showing how my little girl has grown
The driveway she rode a bike in for the first time.
The room I rocked her to sleep in
So sad to leave this old friend behind
So hopeless and frail are the now empty walls
So eerily quiet are the rooms once filled with love.
Once filled with lullabies and songs, laughter and fun.
Dancing in the kitchen
Making pallets and forts on the floor.
All gone.

Even at a tender age, I never seemed to fit in on this generation's page
Something deep inside sparked thoughts and visions of a life long ago.
Words of songs my ears have never heard flowed out like a prayer.
Without effort or consideration.
Always a love for antiques, objects with a past all their own
Seem like old familiar friends that this soul may have known
Always a struggle for this soul has felt far wiser that the age of the body in which it resides
Certain places, faces, and smells send me into flash backs of another life in time.
Not quite clear but non the less present
Drives me to wonder
Was there a purpose unfilled
A reason for one soul to live again and again
Until finally destiny is complete.

Strong comforting smell awakes my senses
Pulls me like a magnetic field
Out of my warm, soft alluring nest
Lead by the nostrils like a leash to the kitchen
Where this black gold has hypnotized my mind and body
Trickling down my throat
Filling this body with a gentle burning sensation
Awaking the soul

Silence is a gift
An escape from the constant noise of this tragic play
Removed from all technology and the constant exchange of information
No one tugging at my soul
No one breaking my spirit
No words of discouragement or condemnation
No static of electricity fogging up my mind

Alone in my reality
Free to ponder life's greatest mysteries, without fear of judgement or ridicule
Free to create and watch imagination flow
To live in a fantasy of my own
A world that only exists for me
A place where time no longer plays a part
Where money and material things hold no value.

Gentle, warm breeze caresses my cheek
Wind flows like fingers through my hair
For a moment my hand is flying on the breeze as it hangs out the window of my car.
Sunshine lands on my face and thaws a frozen heart
For that single solitary moment my soul is free
All the worries of the mind give way to each individual sense.
Amazed how simple pleasures can set us free
Remove all inhibition
Strip away the ugliness of this world
I imagine this is how heaven will be
A million simple pleasures that repeat over infinity
Our eyes will truly be opened and see the beauty of the small moments
See the magnitude of all that was taken for granted during our mortal life
Like the sweet song of birds as they wake to the rising sun
The chirp of crickets on a warm summer evening
The formation of clouds as they float by
The smell of a fire burning on a crisp autumn eve.
The glistening of fire flies through the trees
The comforting lullaby of a mother's voice
How lucky are we?
If only for a moment to experience how wonderful this world can be

First let me say:
No one is perfect
We all are unique
We all learn differently
We think seperatley
Our dreams and ambitions belong to our individual souls.
So why do yoy expect my daughter to be a cookie cutter image of a child at her age?
She is special and perfect in my eyes.
With a heart of pure innoscense and gold.
But all you see are the tears, the tantrums, and the fears.
You don't see the sweet little girl that cries herself to sleep because she never feels good enough.
You don't see the defeat and pain in her big brown eyes when a task is difficult or hard to understand.
The frustration because she doesn't know how to cope or why shes not like the rest.
The depth of exhaustion she experiences every day because her little body is not strong enough to master the challenges of the day.
You don't see the despiration to be accepted and loved.
Her mind and body communicate at the speed of light or at the pace of a tourtise.
So young she has no words to explain the torture that normal activities cause her pain.
You don't see the spatk of hope when praised for a job well done.
You don't hear her screams for help. A hand to guide her through this world.

You said you wanted a good woman.
But when one came knocking at your door
You changed your mind and decided to settle for a *****.
You don't want DRAMA
Well isn't that exactly what you're asking for?
A wolf in cheap spandex
Who may satisfy that primal urge
But she's not sleeping in her bed alone.
A robber of affection
She gets her kicks on other's rejection
No matter who she is
It won't last
Emptiness fills the void that once was her heart.
and it will consume your every part
She will not care for you or wish you the best.
She is a black widow just like the rest
Casual *** may be your fun
But only while your emotions are on the run.
One day you will see what could be
But then it may be too late.
For good girls hardly ever wait.
So forget this woman who would have given you her heart
And keep the girl who allows numbness to fill her parts.

Through the years many have come and went.
No one stays
Either life guides them away
Or death
I may not be like most
I may think to much and too hard
I may not be bubbly or happy all the time
But I am a loyal friend if you were mine
Someone to talk to
To discuss dreams and hopes
Visions and wishes
A shoulder to cry on
A buddy to watch movies with or
Write with or create with
My heart is overflowing with love
I need to give to share with you
Won't you be my friend til the end?

Left here ages ago
Imagination glides away
To a foreign land
A civil war battle field
Two lovers concealed in shade
Brave natives hunting
A million lifetimes ago

Notch in the oak tree
Has a limitless amount of possibilities
As to how it came to be.

Sharpe edge of an ax
The beaten point of an arrow head
Stabbing of a knife in anger
precise blade of a sword
mark of a bayonet that missed its target

Some thing that has been passed by with no notice
Becomes a new world a new life
to this creative mind
Close my eyes and I am transported to a demension all my own.
And the notch becomes my inpiration.

For:
A person once noticed in a crowd.
A confident young girl with the world at her feet.
A dreamer who believed she could save the world.
The free spirit who followed wherever the wind blew her.
The singer, who may not remember every note.
The rockstar in the bathroom mirror.
The lover of language.
The bleeding heart of a humanitarian.
The nieve teenager.
The believer of promises.
The innocense lost.
The future journalist.
The wife who never had a husband.
The vain reflextion in every shinning surface.
The painter of worlds.
The doodler of notes.
The princess of the apple trees
The tomboy covered in lace.
The brave captive of twisted words.
The enlightened empress
The solitude of a silent sister that brought peace.
The queen of correct
The fighter of the feable minded
The deep thinker lost in her darkness
The mother of happiness
The old soul trapped in this body
The sensative spirit that feels more than the eye can see.
The sleepless gaurd of our home.
The hostess of friendship
For all is me
For all you will see

Actions speak louder than words, unless your words and actions speak different languages.

As the night slips into day
Every bit of consciousness fades away
Flying and gliding into a realm of imagination and possibility
Deep down the rabbit whole I fall
Where perception becomes reality and anything can form
Infinity of choices, banquet of emotions flow freely as the expansion of the mind creates amazing atmospheres and glorious experiences.
My human body ceases to exist
The spirit has taken charge and the soul is exploring the vast abyss.
Dancing in the evening as a flame burning bright.
Lighting the darkness of this uncaring world.
Evolving into the warmth of a sunset, vibrant oranges and reds
As light and free as a cloud flowing through the open air
Drifting endlessly through the heavens.
Weightless
Transforming into a beam of light.
Reflecting every face, every motion of the sea
Bouncing from surface to surface
Innocent and buoyant as a child jumping carefree on a trampoline on a warm summer day
Breathing in the fresh cut grace and blooming daisies.
Basking in the sensation of the breeze washing over my skin.
Blanketed in the comfort and security
Like a fuzzy quilt of love on a gloomy rainy morning
Or the embrace of a mother to her small child.

I would endure an eternity of solitude for a moment encased in your embrace.
Freedom without fear
Fear of rejection
Fear of ridicule
Fear of embarrassment
Fear of being unworthy
Please take this gift of love , the most valuable possession I own
It is torn and tattered,
Worn from wear
Broken and shattered
Weak and at one time beyond repair
Until you appeared with hope to spare
You have stood by my side from the minute we met
Taken care of me in sickness and health
Always a gentleman, gracious and kind
Your actions show me day by day how much you care
No empty words or outrageous promises
Just you!
A friend, a lover, an amazing man
No gallant steed, no crown of glory, but you are my prince charming in a hoodie
After searching far and wide
When I least expected it you arrived
And every day you take me by surprise

Hey You! Yes you there reading this prose.
We could be best friends, who knows?
As you sit and read, you are getting to know a part of me.
I am serving up a slice of my soul for the world to taste.
We share our most intimate thoughts, our wildest dreams.
Our hopes and fears
Our views of the world and emotion
As if we are staring into a mirror instead of a computer screen.
I relate and see or feel as you felt at the time you put life into words.
Even though we have never met, I have shared in your pain,
I have felt love and happiness along side you.
How insane to say but you all are closer to being my soul mate than any other person today.
In my darkest hour,
My fellow poets were there with encouragement and praise
A community unlike any other in this reality.
Diverse and unique
Supportive and creative
Thank you for the inspiration, the faith in humanity that you have restored in me.

I sit and wonder, what does she see?
This amazing little person who is a huge part of me.
She lived close to my soul, our hearts once beat in the same body.
She knows me like no other on this earth.
Sometimes I think she is the only one who truly knows my worth.
Can she see the worry in my eyes?
Can she feel my heart race when she tries something new?
Does she sense the fear when we are apart?
Can she feel the tears that fill my eyes when I think of how her life should have been?
Does she see me hiding my pain? Trying to be strong and brave.
Knowing that I will definitely do so many things wrong
Does she know deep in her heart that I would gladly give my life for hers?
For her happiness, I will sacrifice
For her growth I will fight
For her smile I will give her the world
From the first moment she lived
I have and will give her all that I can give.

Eyes are covered
Hands are bound
Sound has been silenced
Numbness washes over every inch of skin and tissue
Sorrow has become my air
Self pity my fuel
Misery my only companion
Locked in my mind, a move replays over and over
Reliving every failure, every loss, every disappointment, every lie
Drowning in what if
Suffocating in the darkness of the past
The light of day brings no joy, only aggravation
The endless chatter of the world becomes a sting to my heart
A torture to endure.
A overwhelming tug at my heart strings
A feeling of future turmoil
The pit of my stomach physically hurts, Pain
Waiting for an impending doom
Lost without a shred of hope
Why has my faith betrayed me?
Why can't I shake this feeling?
Feels as if I am living in a nightmare never able to awake.

A moment of silence can free the tormented heart.
The world moves at the speed of light.
Time is flying by in the blink of an eye.
So much constant mental stimulation flowing throughout the day.
Technology is gradually stripping our humanity away.
Imagination inspired by the written word has transformed into zombie stares into a screen.
Conversations that once lead to new creations and thoughts that touched the heart and moved the soul, have been discarded like yesterday's trash and replaced with a unemotional, unfeeling text message.
The power of the pen is weakened into memory and replaced with keyboard strikes and lighted screen.
How uncommon it is to find a kindred spirit among the crowd.
Someone who can appreciate the ramblings of a sensitive heart, a wondering mind, an uneasy soul.
That only release of the cage of this society is to put ink to parchment.
Line after Line of the deepest, darkest, dimensions of the mind.

To my sweet daughter:
I may not be able to come to every field trip
Because mommy has to work
I may not be able to attend every class party
or every school holiday or every PTA meeting
I want you to know in my heart I am always with you
Even though this life has dealt us a complicated hand
I will do the best I can to be everything you need me to be.
Mom and Dad all in one, provider and parent
My heart breaks that I am not able to always be there
Not able to give you the world like I wanted to before you were
even born.
Know your love fills my heart, know I would lay down my life
to protect you.
Know that I would sacrifice every thing weather it be possessions or persons
For you.
At night I watch you sleep and wonder and pray
That one day you will understand, one day you will see
how much mommy worried for you, wished for you,
How hard mommy tried to be everything
I am sorry sweetie that some days I find myself so
exhausted that I barley have the energy to play
My mind constantly races all night long and all day
Making sure I did everything I needed to for you that day,
making sure I can save for school things like pictures, book fair,
summer camp, valentines. I never want you to go without, and I
promise I will do anything I have to so that you don't have to experience
that feeling.
And if you get a boo boo I will always be there to kiss it and make it better
And if someone breaks your heart I will be there to hug you and buy you
ice cream to make it better.
Seeing you smile lights up my life, is my reason for living
Even though its just mom
I promise that always and forever I will love you
Never dessert you

Excitement overtakes every inch of my body
Anticipation of your face, your smell your touch
No matter what length of time passes the feeling
never dissipates.

The constant feeling of joy like a kid on Christmas,
The overwhelming emotion that fills my heart and soul
at just the thought of you, the mention of your name.

Suddenly a smile has washed away all memory of the frown
that once resided permanently on my face.
The sorrow of loss, the torment of heart break has been replaced
by peace.
All the what ifs, the will I ever? The rambling of my mind that once
consumed me, left me sleepless to wonder through past and present
mistakes has been silenced.
Contentment, what a new and welcomed emotion.
Able to finally feel confident and comfortable in my own skin.
All because of you.
You ,who sees me the way I always wished I could
You, the voice that calmed the raging sea of my soul
You ,who when our eyes meet the world disappears.
You, whom I will never take for granted
Living, residing in each moment with you is all I will ever want or need.

She moves in the night spinning away
The reason for her being, her purpose in this world
Easy for her, able to work without a worry
This simple spinning begins to form a harmony
A song of beauty and joy
For her task reveals the miracle of one small creature

A painting, no two ever alike
A masterpiece usually never seen, never admired
Only in existence for one night then blown away
by the morning mist
Extraordinary the life of this small spider
And the wonder that she brings
Decorating the world, working for one thing

Watching her spin leaves me at awe
Wondering how such beauty can go to waste
Wondering why we can't see the simple miracles all around
Instead the human race is drowning in our own reflection, our own sound.

In the silence of my room
Deep in the night lost somewhere in a dream
The warmth of  your breath reaches my skin

Not sure what is reality and what is my imagination
I hear the low soothing sound of your voice
Whispering all the words I long to hear

I swear I feel the heat of your body pressed against mine
Taste the sweetness of your kiss
Every inch of my body tingles with anticipation

I fight not wanting to open my eyes
Scared that once I do, reality will set in
And you will be gone

So I lay there in the dark
Overcome by thoughts of you
Emotions you bring forth in me
Feelings never felt only imagined

Closer and closer our bodies collide in a fire of passion,
Pulled in tight wrapped completely in your embrace.
Our lips meet and the world stands still,
Gentle, sweet, moist, warm
Like silk sliding over my skin
All thought is erased in an instant
Enveloped in the moment
Heart pounding, body shaking
Our mouths join together in a dream of bliss until there becomes no beginning and no end
Rubbing, moving in a motion steady and strong
A kiss has removed all inhibitions
we speak in a language all our own
Opened the gates that guard my heart
Eyes shut tight, breath of two souls joined into one life giving emotion
Hands hold and caress my cheek as they run through my hair
What a beautiful experience
Transported to a era of time when a kiss ment so much more
A kiss was the beginning of a fairytale
A kiss of true love that was so powerful it could save a life
When a kiss as this moved boulders and changed the world.

A cool chill flows through my veins,
Warm breathe becomes a billow of smoke in the icy air.
Sharpe, Stinging breezes chap my cheeks and lips.
Old man winter has moved in, removed all heat from the earth and covered the ground with a blanket of white.
The silence of the morning fills all space like an abandoned ghost town
No living creature  utters a sound
Christmas lights shower the night with hope and happiness
Bringing the joy and innocence of childhood to every aging heart
The smell of pine brings back memories of family and fiends
Reminders of human kindness,
The core of what this life is ment to be
A full moon overhead watching over this world giving life to every shadow.

No man has ever touched me with such finesse such ease
As if I am the only woman he desires to please.
The soft caress of your hand on my face
I want to stop time and live in this place

Never have I been truly kissed, as if I am a lost treasure
A brief but breath taking sunset
Gentle, tender and soft
I feel as if I am a delicate flower, vulnerable, exposed
Held with such care such warmth
The dance of your lips against mine
More beautiful than ever imagined
Like rose petals smooth and supple against my skin
At the sound of your voice my heart is soothed
Most times leaves me speechless
Trapped in my head exploring the endless possibilities of us
Imagination running wild, untamed, primitive
Heart pounding so loud I feel as if the world can hear
Short of breathe for once in my life
Unable to see straight or see anything other than your smile

I would trade a million memories for a moment with you.
A lifetime of complacency for a second of bliss in your arms.
Eternity of heart break for a minute close to your soul.

I would wander the earth til the end of time,
lost and forgotten to experience one kiss from your lips.
Sacrifice every material treasure to just hear the sound of your voice.

Comb the world for centuries until my path intersected with yours.
The vastness of my heart can only be filled by you.
The magnitude of every emotion exceeds beyond my wildest fantasies.

Find myself tumbling into an intimacy like the world has never know.
Eyes closed plunging into the reality where only we exist.
Gravitating closer and closer until eventually our bodies connect and become one.

Currents of passion flow freely between our skin.
Every sense is heightened
Every emotion translated into touch, kiss, heat created by friction.

Scintillating, exciting, consuming ecstasy ripples through our bodies
Until the line between us no longer exists.
Light fills the room and every dark memory of the past is eliminated.

Like a paint brush to a canvas, you smoothly, gently stroke the colors of rapture
across every inch of my body.
Intoxicated by your gaze
I give every bit of my body and soul so easily to you.

My heart races and the ground begins to quake
Sparks fly and the eternal flame is ignited.
As your lips discover every line, every uncharted territory of my body
I slip into a euphoria
Tingling, soft chills fill my limbs
Taking me to a height of pleasure that radiates and washes over me.

Complete for the first time
Joined as a whole body connected on a much deeper level than the physical
I melt into you and surrender my existence to your will.

I've found solace in your arms.
Found my heart in the reflection of your eyes.
Found redemption in your kiss.

All my life I have prayed for you.
Imagined the sound of your voice, the shape of your face.

Knowing that the moment we met I would recognize you instantly
No doubt or question that you are my other half.

Sweet, soft, slow tingling sensation that fills my body and replaces the
blood pumping through my veins.

Hypnotized by your gaze,
I forget every heartache, every bit of pain I have ever felt.

Unable to resist your charm,
To control this smile that starts in my soul and radiates through my face.

So similar in spirit, we complete each other.
Predestined encounter has forever changed my life.

I knew your heart, your touch before we ever came face to face.
Two garments made from the same cloth
Our souls were joined before they every came into this world.
True Soul mates.

My hand fits perfectly into yours.
Like a lock and key
You have opened up a whole new world to me.

Endless possibilities, breathe taking moments, and grand adventures.
Abundant blessings shown to us with every new day.
Our future is being revealed page by page.
A true fairy tale.

Even though our physical bodies have yet to be introduced,
I feel as if our souls have known each other for eternity.

What a strange, rare indescribable feeling
Almost like deja vu, this familiar stranger
As if we met long ago in some far off dream
A alternative reality, where only the spirit lives

Your voice, so comforting, music to my ears
A gentle soul that resides on the same wave length as my own
Someone who can relate and sympathize with the demons of past experiences

So much time spent searching, waiting
for a companion, a true friend
Missing a person I've never met
Someone to take the time and effort to truly get know my heart.

Someone to see past this exterior body,
To look deep into my eyes and see the beauty of my soul.
To hear my thoughts, cherish my dreams and wash away the torment of my past.

Could that person be you?
The hope it brings renews my spirit
Lifts me so high, my feet are no longer touching the ground.

Hidden behind the makeup of society
Painted faces gaze as they tread through life like a zombie
Bright colors camouflage the emptiness behind their eyes.
Airbrushed smiles cover their faces that are emotionless underneath.

No substance, no depth of spirit
Fake kindness, rude and cruel compliments
The sweetest words pour out like poison
Puppets strung up by their own insecurities.

Sad and deformed clowns on this stage of reality
The play is so routine they perform without any cues
Drunk off attention only the audience can supply
Becoming so inebriated that no function of self control exist

Plastic dolls arranged in a row
Uniform and neat
No uniqueness, No imagination
Positioned and moved by riches and cold hard cash.

Cold and uncaring world outside of your skin
Frozen humanity, frigid stares, empty minds
Frostbit by the snow of this dying society
She runs, trips, leaps in desperate search for warmth

Before she succumbs to their tempting icy gaze
Sliding by each false reality, skating by vagrant dreamers
who have lost all hope of reprieve
Where is her salvation, her sun
The arms to wrap her in fire

In an instant she is melted by his feverish kiss
Passion ignites in her heart, he sets her soul ablaze
Lingering finger tips glide over her pale white skin
Soft, sensual, the steam rises from every part of her body
She basks in the glow of his heart, the sound of his voice
The smell of his skin, the gentleness of his embrace.

Flames burn in her eyes only for him
Uncontrollable, instant masterpiece of us
Layers of daydreams, inspiration floods her mind
Union of two opposite elements that create this new and unique unit
The beauty seen through his eyes, translates to the words
that leave her lips.

Together they are more vibrant than a burning star
Hand in hand in a reality all their own
Blind to the outside common world
Deaf to the sounds of ignorance
Transforming experience to art and words to images of rapture.

We all know the story of Romeo and Juliet
But this is the untold story of another fair, beautiful Capulet
Rosaline as you may come to know
Met her demise at the hands of a Montague

She was the first object of dear Romeo's affection
But for dainty Rosaline, Romeo was not her selection.

He desperately tried to win her gaze.
She would only give hints to her hearts twisting maze.
Faithful to her vows of chastity
Another Montague held her key.

Benvolio stole her heart and won her affection
From first glance she was swept away, a true connection
Like the gentle lullaby of a nightingale
Her soul composed a symphony on his instrument could play

Kissed like the petals of a rose by the morning dew
A simple touch of his hand created a overwhelming sensation only they knew
Secretly inseparable, hidden romance
Their houses would not understand, so they took a very risky chance.

Until the day of that faithful fray between Capulet and Montague
Rosaline was caught in the crossfire of the two
Trying to keep the peace she lunged ahead
And at the hand of her true love she was dead.

He had not even a heartbeat to react.
Blinded by hate, a moment he could never take back.
Plagued by loss and despair
As if his lungs had been drained of air.

As the life left her eyes
He died inside.
Tragedy washed over their houses.
And in the end,
Hate won the war,
Love was left mangled and destroyed.

Stone silent drifting in the moment between sleep and awake
That is where we meet again
Even though my eyes are closed I see you clearly
As if you were still here with me, holding me tight

I feel the soft velvet touch of your hand on my cheek
Lost in this ghostly dream
Floating to the ceiling from a simple memory
Your body may be here no longer
But your energy, part of your heart remains with me.

Why can't I let you rest in peace
Why do I dream of you so much
In my thoughts day and night
Enamored by your ghost, tortured by time

No painful high heels
No tennis shoes
No flats

Bare feet on the sand
Running through the grass
On the cold kitchen floor
Skipping down the drive way
Sliding down the hallway
Jumping on the bed
****** my tootsies
Soak in the pool
Don't restrict my freedom
Skin on skin
Touch is so under appreciated
Feel every sensation, new and untainted
Like lying in a bed of feathers

Hot summer evening in the deep south
Cool tender breeze blows through my hair
Birds chirping and crickets singing a song of innocence.

"Here comes the Sun"playing on the radio
Carefree, running, laughing
Inhaling the smells of fresh cut grass, and wild flowers
Bathing in the afternoon rain

Resting and reading under the shade tree
He has been a loyal friend through the years
Climbing and hanging upside down on his sturdy branches
Playing hide and seek behind his trunk
Carving our initials into the bark
First kissed under the stars, sheltered by this companion of ours.

Simplicity, pure joy
Warmth flowing into our hearts and against our skin
Days that seemed to last forever
From sun up to sun down
Under the shade tree is where I am found.

Inside my mind you will find a reality only ideal for me,
Intertwined with the desire of the heart a wonderland is formed
Long winding roads that lead to nowhere,
Breezes so crisp and cool, flowing through your skin,
Surrounding every moment, sending tingles up your spine.

A wild sensual freedom, of dancing in the rain.
Covered by the gentle drops of water, washing away all sins.
Washing away all wrong, all sadness, all pain.

Awakening of the soul, the taste of a first kiss.
Continuous sensation, moist, wet, sweet, as lips meet.
A warm embrace, lost in the company of strong loving arms
Safe and sound, never to be let down.

Colors of emotion surround every minute
Dark Blood Red passion
Pale ocean blue serenity
Bright blinding white light of hope
Glowing green of  generosity
Deepest night of black bitterness
Watch as the colors change  like a cameleon.

Mazes of experience will change perception
Reality of mine own, worlds created by the imagination
Lost in a ocean of thoughts, a sea of memories.

One second will be ecstasy, the next depression
Sickness of a tortured soul
Surrounded by the faith of a hopeless romantic
I am a lover of Love
Searching the world for one soul, to trap inside this reality
To see the world as I see
To become the defender of my dreams,
The soldier of my heart.

It's an irritating itch that I cannot reach.
A nightmare that replays over and over.
This undying urge to search for love.

Addicted to the high that comes with new and possible forever,
Constantly looking under every rock, afraid that it has already passed me by.
Blind to warnings, lies or danger.
Seeking comfort, affection, admiration from a stranger.

Obsessed with this ideal, this fairy tale that becomes a drug.
Drunk off the thoughts, the memories of a love.
Drowning in solitude, I gasp for the sweet air only he can give.

Always wearing my heart and every emotion on my sleeve.
Exposed, Naked in a crowd.
So many scars cover what's left of my soul.
They bleed and reopen, still I seek something to fill this whole.
Screaming at the top of my lungs but no one around to hear.
Never truly finding it is my greatest and only fear.

Stuck on this carousel of life
Unable to get free
Constantly going up
Or coming down
Round and Round we go

Makes me dizzy to look at the world as it spins
So fast that the scene of people becomes a blur
Constantly moving and changing shape

As a child it was awe inspiring
The magic the beauty of the colors
No worries of what is flying past
Just enjoying the ride
Smiling, laughing carefree and happy

The more we age, the more the fun begins to turn to worry
Instead of wanting to go faster
We wish we could slow down and enjoy every second
Freeze moments in time
Freeze emotions
Freeze memories

This broken carousel holds us hostage
To a world moving so fast we can't see
What beauty and joy lies directly in front of us
Until one day the gears will wear down
The paint will fade
and the music will stop forever.

Because I never got to say goodbye
This letter is all the reasons and feelings I kept inside.
I took for granted our youth and the promise of tomorrow.
Now every day I am drowning in this sorrow.
I thought you would always be there, always care, always listen, always be my shoulder to lean on.
I never imagined in the blink of an eye you would be gone.
This is the hardest letter I have ever had to write,
I just hope you know my heart even though you are no longer in my sight.
Every moment that became a memory is so very precious to me.
Even though our time together on this earth was short, I will cherish every laugh, every smile
every sweet word you gave to me.
The time we spent in Virginia was like heaven to me.
Walking hand in hand.
Laughing, talking, sharing, embracing, kissing
The rest of the world ceased to exist.
Or the walk through the park as you put your arms around me to keep me warm.
Or Sunday afternoon having coffee and conversing for hours.
You gave me hope and another way to view this cruel world.
You gave me strength to finally stand up for myself,
even though I never told you .
You brought out the best in me.
My world is so much darker without your light.
You had the kindest heart.
I will miss you always and I pray that I can hold the memories of you
like a movie in my mind to play over and over until we meet again.
Know that you took a piece of my heart with you.
I love you Jonathan. And I will hold that love in my heart until my days on this earth have ended.

In the flash of a memory I am transported back in time,
To the first time we ever met, seems like a eternity ago.
I remember up until that point boys had cooties, but
When we met that all changed.

I can still see that cute, sweet little boy who caught my attention.
Sitting in a desk in front of mine.
I remember waiting until recess to play and sing.
A sweet innocence of youth that we shared.

Then as the years passed by we went down different paths.
But even though you were not in my sight I often wondered
How you were, where you were, did you ever wonder about me too.

Then fate crossed how souls once more, over twenty years later.
When you walked in the room, all the memories flooded my heart.
I knew you face, would have recognized you anywhere.
The same beautiful smile, the same kind eyes.

Automatically we picked up right where we left off.
The connection between our souls remained, even after the miles
and years apart.
What a blessing to have you return to my life.

Conversations lasted for hours, glances burned into my brain.
You are forever impeded in my heart.
Friendship and love filled the empty void.

We keep in touch and you have been my shoulder to lean on
My confidant, my defender, my voice of reason.
Now once again this cruel world has separated our earthly bodies,
But you need to know, no matter what the situation, no matter how far,
no matter how hard the road ahead may be,
My heart is with you,
My soul speaks to yours in a language only we can understand.
I am here, and always will be.

Almost unbelievable how fast a human emotion can mutate
One minute is filled with visions of love and a future so wanted and deserved
The next is a nightmare of deceit, betrayal and heartbreak

Am I to shut off my humanity, become cold and calculated?
Guarded to any emotion good or bad
Self preservation, lock down what is left of my heart?

No one is to be trusted, selfish uncaring, heartless being
I was tangled up in the words you fed me, in your web of lies
Struggling to get free, unmovable in the thick substance bonded to my soul

How could I be so blind?
The best Casanova I have every encountered.
Too good to be true.

That’s ok, take your victory
For you have won the battle not the war
I will come out on top and be much stronger than before.

I want to live in the moment just before our lips meet,
Where one breathe is shared by two bodies.
Every time my eyes close, I want to be transported into the inferno of desire
Where each and every thought is only of you and the fire burning between us.
A place where only your touch is essential to my survival.
Needed and wanted more than air or water.
Where time stands still and the world around us evaporates.

I want to rest in the depth of your gaze.
Safe, and worshiped
Looking in your eyes I see my true reflection, something much deeper than the exterior
A true vision of my soul.

To taste nothing but the sweetness of your kiss
Moist and soft, warm and gentle
The taste of ecstasy.

To only hear the soothing sound of your voice.
Singing me a lullaby, whispering words of love softly saying my name.

To only inhale your scent, captivated by your cologne
A smell that lingers even when you are gone and reminds me of all the ways and reasons
I fall in love with you over and over again.
All my senses have been overcome by you and everything that you are.

Distance is my enemy
Space has imprisoned me
This void swallows me whole
Holding my heart in a vice until you are here to release it.

Miles of highway hold me hostage
Rope made of time binds my soul
My dreams are my only solace until you return to my arms.

Solitude is torture when there is someone you crave to be next to,
Loneliness starts to seep in, Covering my heart slowly until I feel as if I am drowning.
The breathe being pulled out of my lungs,
So painful, so intense, losing consciousness
Being here without you literally causing so much pain.

Unfair fate, you tease me
Allowing me to find my true love, my one and then not allow us to stay together.
Cruel Karma, is this your will?
To truly experience ecstasy
Only to have it snatched away from me.

To wander in the darkness
Knowing the position of my light
But never being able to contain it.
The time together seems to disappear in the blink of an eye
While the seconds become days without you.

Underneath her stone exterior
Far below the ground
Miles away from the great wall
She has built around her heart,

Lies a quiet, vulnerable little girl
Terrified of rejection
Scared to death to open up
To trust another once more

Always waiting, watching,
Afraid of betrayal
Her poor hear is so damaged,
So fragile, so weak

Once more heartbreak will be her demise
Apprehensive to see hope of new love and open her eyes.

Will she succumb to the safety of being alone?
Or will she leap off this cliff and free fall into the wide open air of love?

Her deepest desire is to find her other half, her true love,
The one god made just for her.

To find him she will have to truly let go of her past,
Erase the scars of decayed love.
Finally be free to open up to another soul and not hold back.

In the blink of an eye my whole existence has transformed.
With a simple hello my former reality disappeared.
Enveloped in your embrace my guard was demolished.

The melody of your heart serenades my soul.
The reflection of light in your eyes leaves me breathless.
The depth and sincerity of your character has captivated my spirit.

Every soft sweet kiss leaves me starving for more.
Every caress of my cheek makes me weak.
Every word that forms on your lips becomes my life giving air.
The anthem of my heart plays only for you.

All thoughts, all day dreams gravitate toward you.
The heat resonating from your body wraps me in flames of ecstasy and lust.
A chemistry like this I have never known.
I long to be in your presence
To feel your skin pressed against mine
The sensation of a thousand butterfly wings covering every inch of my body.

So blessed that your path crossed mine
Ready to experience new firsts that become lasts til the end of time.