we were a big bang
a beginning
beautiful, prolific, thundering

the bang created matter
it created so much that mattered
but it also created space

as time went on
the space got larger, it expanded
as the noise got softer

the matter was still there,
just farther apart
still beautiful, just changing

our universe got so large
that it was foolish to cling to each other any more
you can’t fight gravity

since we let go
and let our orbits run their course
I feel so free, so strange

a great deal of space separates us now
and our orbits are uncharted
but we will always have come from that big bang

It was so nice to think
that things would have worked out
had we been dealt another hand

but I can see now
that that’s not true
and that that’s okay

Telling myself lies softened the blow then
but I am stronger now
strong enough to look the truth in the eye

You are not the one for me
We would never have worked
We are better off apart

Brighter loves are coming our way

I got too tired
of pushing against the grain

it just wasn’t worth it anymore

I don’t think that love
is supposed to have so much friction

Real, true friends
My evenings to spend as I please
Freedom from wondering when you’d call
Confidence in my desirability
The ability to make choices without explanation
An understanding of heartbreak
An appreciation for my strength
Liberation from guilt and obligation
Courtship and romance
Perspective on my wants and needs
Standards for what I deserve
Love for who I am

I don’t think about you so much anymore
And when I do
Everything feels softer

Other men have kissed my lips,
Touched my body

The first time I wasn’t ready for it
The second time I was

My current reality
was incomprehensible
to my (not so) past self


Time is a heck of a force
It plowed through our love,
our connection

It cut me dry;
it set me free

What do I want?

It wasn’t working with you
It couldn’t work with him
It’s not working with who it should

Maybe for now
I’ve just got to make it work
with me

This week I felt
the cool rush of air whipping past me
as I skated around the rink in Bryant Park
Hand in hand with my week-long somebody

I felt the sunshine pouring in through my window
then making me squint when I walked outside
warming up the cold air and waking up my sleepy eyes
illuminating the in-a-hurry 7:45am Upper East Siders

I peered into countless little worlds
on the street, in the airport, through windowpanes
each with its own sounds and smells
each so full of life

I heard a new song on the bus
I shared a drink with an old friend
I shared a kiss with a new one
I bustled
I paused
I lived.

I am going to be okay