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Im insecure
Im scared and unsure
Of myself.
I don’t really play video games
Or read a lot of books.
Im not that smart
But I like to pretend I am in front of you.
And infront of you im one person,
With myself im another.
Ive made a lot of mistakes
That one day ready or not all have to face…
Im a fanatic about piano and I sing A LOT
Im sure it annoys a lot of people. But that’s okay.
Sometimes I don’t understand who I am or even know what to do next.
But I guess that’s when I put my faith in God and just rest.
Im just like you.
I hate being rejected,
I hate conflicts
And I have issues too…
I guess if you really think about it,
Im not that much different than you.
Give me this friendship you have offered me
But since you my best friend that lives right down the road
You seem not to care anymore.
So why do I give you that second chance you deserve.
I'm always the forgiving friend that you could have
The one that chooses not to fight
The one that keeps each other on track with our friendship
But since you keep deciding to try and ruin my happiness
I guess we can never have a true friendship.
But if you choose to let me have the happiness I want most.
Then yes I will forgive you
and I will continue to be your friend.
I wrote this about a year ago because one of my friends had almost ruined my happiness and friendship, so I gave him another chance and I told him to read my poem and he took this poem and sealed to his heart because he doesn't want to loose my friendship.
 Jun 2013 alan spivey
Mara Kennet
Questions
Only questions,
Silly stupid questions.
You know the answers.
I sold my love for nothing,
Got nothing in exchange.
Broken dreams,
Broken hearts,
Broken hopes.
I sold my love;
I am standing outside,
Rain slaps my face,
Yes it’s me
Behind your window,
Touching your shadows
Begging for a drink
I am always sick
And thirsty.
I sold my heart, my pride, my conscience
I tore off my desires,
But their pieces still disturb me
I should have sent roses
To the graves
When you cross my mind.
But.. I sold my mind as well.
 Jun 2013 alan spivey
AJ
When I was six I was in girlscouts.
One day I went to a jail
It was a fieldtrip that I did not enjoy.
They told us that when you were seven you could get arrested,
And they could spray things in your eyes.
I did not know you had to commit a crime first.
I wanted to be six forever.
On my seventh birthday I was very nervous.
I made myself sick and could not even enjoy my birthday pancakes,
Even though they had m'n'ms in them.
Who doesn't love m'n'ms?
I cried on and off all day,
And on our way to dinner I heard sirens.
My heart stopped for a good two seconds.
And that was the most scared I have ever been in my whole life.
 Jun 2013 alan spivey
AJ
Really?
 Jun 2013 alan spivey
AJ
I'll always be there to pick up the pieces, but I wish it didn't happen so often.
And every time you say it'll be different, but sweetie you've lost it.
Cause you just keep putting your hand in the fire, despite that you've been burned, you'll never learn.
And she won't change a **** thing, and it will just keep happening.
And you'll keep crying, and I'll be dying on the inside cause your tears burn me like acid rain, and I can feel the pain I don't want you to feel, and I know it will never change.
I didn't hear when you'll called last night, I fell asleep cause I was just to tired to handel it all.
And this happens all the time, now I'm here to catch you while you fall.
Get your hand away from the flame, and stop playing this game.
Cause every time you play it ends the same.
And she won't change a **** thing, and you will just keep losing.
And she'll keep winning, you didn't see it from the beginning when the cards were dealt, and it felt like nothing was there, just stop looking where some isn't hiding, because the game she plays isn't fair.
 Jun 2013 alan spivey
AJ
When I was eight I got very sick.
I got to eat mac n cheese on the couch,
and drink chocolate chip milkshakes.
Today I felt sick.
So I made some mac n cheese,
and I sat down on the couch.
I wanted the milkshake.
I didn't have any chocolate chip ice cream,
So I made strawberry.
Then I sat at the counter and looked at my mess.
The milk was out,
The ice cream was uncovered and melting
The blender was on its side.
It looked very sad.
Like it was a Roman village I had just conquered.
I killed all the strawberry milkshake children.
They had such bright futures until they drowned
In a puddle of one percent milk.
I discovered I don't like strawberry milkshakes that much.
And now I have a mess in the kitchen,
My car needs gas,
And I smell like cigarettes and self deprivation.
And everything is easier when you're eight and your mother cooks you your special sick person dinner.

— The End —