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  Nov 2014 Aditya
betterdays
i am made of...
thought...
ink and pen and paper... and so much more.
scribbled phrases on diner napkins.
post it notes stuck to walls.
scrawled doggerel in bathroom pens.
phrased ideology in lined notebooks.
spinnered words on lazerprinted A4.
scraps of inklings, on ripped butcher's bags and wrappings.
condolences in funeral books.
ideas capital lettered on cards,
pinned to cork boards.
epitaphs stonemasoned
into granite blocks.
fury arranged just so,
on parchment.
newsprinted with loose blurry, black ink on broadsheets
scribed by pointed stick on
firm wet sand.
notes on heavy cards, of love
and light bright shiny stuff.
discarded sentence startings, left crumpled, lost in a bin.
loss, written with red wine on white table cloth.
art, etched on vellum anciently old, suprisingly relevent.
tapped into tablets both stone
and techview.
blue and red markers squeaked onto white boards.
daubed on canvas with a fine sable brush.
tatttoo-ed upon ones flesh.
carved into wooden school desks.
pressed into moist clay by delicate fingernails.
marked so deeply upon a soul.
chalked to cement,
to stay for...
but a short season.
written for some very, (un)important reason.
courage to speak, sing, whisper, shout, cry, laugh, observe and ponder.
this is me....
i am a word written down.. any word, any word.
i am undeniable, desirable often incomplete
always open  always waiting
for some one...
......just like you ...
to open your heart let me in
to recognize a new start
to have a play, a scribble,
doodle, pen jive. to become
alive.... to thrive,
just begin with a single letter.....then another,
go on be brave...
..........grant me liberty....
  Oct 2014 Aditya
Helen
Dear World

I'm no *Aphrodite

I have not the powers
of Zeus
I might be closer
to Hades
but I'm not so
obtuse
I can't handle separation
just like Persephone
or handle rejection
like Narcissus
I'm not built like that
you see?
I don't dance like Callisto
nor frolic like Nereid
I would like think
I'm not so frivolous
as *that

I'm not one to look upon
a perfectly formed vista
and pronounce myself
Queen of all
but in a small voice
in the dark of night
I whisper

I'm not  Atlas  *either
I'm so tired of having to hold up my world :(
Aditya Aug 2014
Life is cruel and sick
People may say
But had my own fight with it
Again and again
Sometimes I would lose
Sometimes win
But in those battles I realized
That life never gave up on me
I see others and I realize
That they gave up on life
Not the other way round
So now I see life as a man
Who never gives up on his child
A mother never tries to get rid of her daughter
And a friend who never lets u down
It’s always you who lets life down
So why blame life when it’s all your fault
Why blame situations
When in every situation it u who decides what to do
And what not to do
Why blame people around when u can control your own self
And most of all why blame god when he is not even there
In reality u are the master of your fate
As your the master of your mind
And your the master of your life.
  Aug 2014 Aditya
L
I can't let myself think about you anymore
Or your hands
Or where you put your hands
Or the way it felt when you put your hands on me
Or the gentle sighs I exhaled because it felt so good
Oops
I'm thinking about how it felt
And That's Not Allowed
I can't think about that day at the amusement park
Or us getting lost
Or why we got lost
Because I put the map in my back pocket
And told you if you wanted it you had to get it
I can't think about the photo booth there
Or the reason it took us twenty minutes to take one picture
Such a bad picture of such a good day
Oops
I'm thinking about it again
And That's Not Allowed
I can't think about the car ride home
I can't think about when we stopped for dinner and your parents went inside to order
We stayed in the car
I can't think about that
I can't think about the countless movies we pretended to watch while our eyes were too busy getting lost in the moment
Or how it felt to have your lips pressed against my neck
The stubble on your chin tickled in a good way
Your neck tasted good
I hope mine did
I can't think about you telling me to be careful
Don't leave a mark
And me ignoring you
I wanted to leave a mark
I wanted a piece of myself with you
I can't think about the long hugs when your hands wandered down from my waist to my hips
And sometimes (every time) even farther
Or the way you pulled me closer
And closer
And c l o s e r
Until I could feel you
Really feel you
For the first time
I can't think about the first time I fell asleep on you
You were explaining the origin of your last name
Your stupid last name that I thought would be mine someday
Oops
I'm thinking about it
And That's Not Allowed
I remember where I was sitting when you told me you liked me
I remember what I was wearing when you said I was your favorite
I remember it
But I'm not allowed to think about it
I can't think about the way you smelled--
Like sweat and febreeze and something spicy I could never place
Or how soft your hair was
Or how rough your hands were
Or how I got lost in your eyes
Those big brown eyes
I loved them
But ******* I can't think about them
That's Not Allowed
I can't think about your voice
It was my favorite lullaby
Or the goofy side your never let anyone see
Anyone except me
Why me
Why did you need to break me?
I miss you
I love you
But I can't think about you anymore
That's Not Allowed.
Aditya Aug 2014
Some say I come fast
Some say I watch and decide
But I just cross-by rending you from the illusion of the world being one
I am the savior
I believe, I am who show u true light
And says u been in darkness for a long time
I am the one who is god messenger whereas
Life is just a prison where you spend your days in grief and misery
But still I see men women alike praying that I never come
Praying I leave them in misery
Praying for me to die
Whereas they embrace life like there friend, partner and guardian
And then at those miserable times
I think why am I being blamed for what I am not
For what I never do
For what I never become
What I never was
They say death is a punishment for their sins
They say I, I am heartless
But never have they seen the world from my view
Where it’s just an illusion
It is just a cloud
Waiting to be removed
From your eyes
And let u see
your own self
THAT IS DEATH.

— The End —