Talk to me,
for I am alone.

Take my hand,
for I am lonely.

Promise me,
for I am scared.

Hold me,
for I am fading.

Bury me,
for I have gone cold.

This night,
again unchanged,
I am alone.

With mind and brain
speeding,
speeding,
light-speeding.

My eyes probe the night sky.

Listening ever so intently,
for all the truthful lies they whisper.

All those tiny dots.

All those forgotten wishes of old.

One by one,
they fall back to earth.

To be shattered by the mountains.

Or to be drowned by the oceans.

What was once bright,
is now dead and broken.

There once was a man
who often ran
from all his life,
for it was filled with strife.

One day,
with mind astray,
he stumbled and broke a leg
on an uneven protruding peg.

Down and down he fell,
upon a bed of eggshell.

Bleeding out his heart,
hoping that it would turn to art.

Instead,
it turned to lead.

So he did
what he had done as a kid.

Squeezing his brain,
causing himself to go insane.
And in a last resort,
maybe possibly to abort,
he bent his knees
and begged his pleas
to the entirety of his soul,
Asking only for a loophole.

Up and out of this hell.

I tell you...

I love your laugh,
and the twinkle in your eyes.

I love your hips,
and the way they sway.

I love your smiles,
and the dimples they leave behind.

I love your hair,
and the way it flows down your back.

I love your voice,
and how it soothes my mind.

I love your eyes,
and all the subtle colors within.

I love everything about you,
and anything that you could ever be.

I tell you...

I love you
and all that you are.

I continue to write.

To spill.

To bleed.

In hopes that you will read,
and absorb,
and comprehend,
what I desperately try
to tell you.

To cry out to you.

To shout to you.

What I want you to see...

What I hope that you will see...

What I need you to see!

But deep down,
deep within,
I know that my voice is silent.
I know that it is futile.

Just as is
my time on this planet.

Just as is
My love for you.

Just as is
This breath in my lungs.

Just as is
the need to speak these words
that I wish to tell you.

I remember when
we used to play pretend.

Running around the house
was our time.
For us, and no one else.

Often we would play "War,"
with guns,
and tanks,
and planes.

One of us would pretend to die,
one of us would pretend to win.

The victor would stand over the body of the other.
Arms would be raised in triumph.

But on this day,
I stand over your body once again.

Not in triumph,
But in turmoil and misery.

I am not the winner of a pretend game...

Instead,
I am the loser of this reality.

A pawn to this sick existence.

I realize now,
that this is for real.

I cannot bring you back with tickles and laughs.

Not this time.

You are gone,
and I would give anything
to have you at my side
one more time.

I need an ally
to help me fight this war.

This war that I face alone.

Stay away!

You have hurt me.

More than I thought possible.
More than words can describe.

The wounds you inflict
are not the kind that leave scars.

Worse...

They leave memories.