I sit alone
In wild abandon
I see through walls
that aren’t there
Paint pictures of darkness
in my mind
I fear not the lonely streets
My heart hardened
by lifetimes of deceit
While birds chirp
outside the morning window
Rabid broken dreams
infect my every step
Sidewalks bow
before my feet
While christ bleeds
from a twisted cross
above my bed
Moons of suffering
Children of dread
hang from threads
And the minstrel at the gate
Says nothing at all
Some wounds never heal
Sometimes the healing never ends
And grey skies bend
down toward the sea

All the things i did in school
Alway made me look a fool
I no longer have the energy to go along
They try to teach you to believe
By always trying to deceive
Christ i got so tired of that song

So you head out on your own
Determined to make yourself a home
And surround yourself with people you hardly know
They’re just lonely for a friend
They won’t love you in the end
And pretty soon you find out this is so

The wolds is such a lonely place
The winds of change all in your face
The future a dark place beyond the dawn
Honey i’m comin home
But i’m not sure anymore where i come from
I'm not sure anymore where I come from

So I’m all alone tonight
creeks are rolling down my cheeks
And a heavy world of pain
Stacked up on my chest
Honey in a world without you
All i do is fall
I don’t think that i can do it
I don’t think that I can do it after all…

You can keep your Shelley's, Frost's and Eliot's
Your Tennysons and Chaucer’s too
You can even hold on to ole Willie
I'm sure you're certain I must be a fool
Sorry, but none of their beautiful poesy
Ever left its mark on me
I mean no disrespect
I just  don't connect
But do leave the wild ones, please!
Those whose every word screams
Turbulent wild and free
Free from shackles of confinement
Those who  shun government, god & sage
Who write whatever their fiery heart renders
Who really know how to make the pen rage
I have no time  for meticulously well written
And mathematically perfected rhyme
I crave to feast on fire & madness
As i ply my poor soul with wine
Lorca makes my blood boil
Pinero always leads  me to think
Micheline blows my mind
After Bukowski, I just need  a drink
Poe leaves me begging for more
Kerouac floods with me with wonder
Di Prima crushes me to bits
Plath breaks my heart, makes me cry
Carelessly tosses me  into the dark
Abandoned and screaming out why???
Kaufman sizzles my synapses
Corso torches my brain
Ginsberg provokes me to howl
Hirschman drives me insane
These, some of the poets & brave warriors
Who left only scorched earth in their wake
All the while wasting, nary a line
Outlaw Zen Master Poets
Out of whom shined
THE BEAUTY OF MIND!

I swim the staggering waters of excess
Tread pathways of vacuous intent
I lean into the winds of my desires
Dance through the consciousness of the Sages of old
Through the raging of sacred notes
That comprises the hallowed music of time
Forever in motion
Moving this way and that
For to move is to live,
To move Is to thrive
Even as the stillness maneuvers there is light
A light that unfurls the secrets of the darkest night
And i bask in this darkness
In the pleasure of its hidden treasures
Every nook and cranny bare wonder
In every wonder, delight
I sail forth on the energy of the unknown
To the edge of the precipice of mind
I welcome the depths of nothingness
As the wickedness of the infinite
Lashes the worlds of man
And rains words into expanse
i become undone
Merge with the sky and sun
Lose myself outside the lines
Stretch outward to the netherworld
To feast on the sweet nectar of the forbidden vine

Nightmare Headlight Grooves
Somnolent beady eyes
gaze nightmare headlight grooves
down mental jazz highways
Fifth gear madness cruise

Curtain call sidewinder
fuses free radical hubris
that seeps through narcan nausea
Bleaches turbine
***** needle mind brakes
graves of iron lung
coffin spliff lunch steaks

wino cement laden
propane chin checks
write mayhem ghost notes
of underbelly angst decks

restrained malice inflates
blood chalice sinew port wines
over stealth freak show marble bowled
macabre street gutter fried
all neon eyed and worm holed
fissures and seizures emit soul holes,

fresh flavors echo
of the pied piper piped plenty,
interconnected and infected
syphilis sideshows
rumble rock hard
phallus neon diatribes,
full force neo curdling
simonized currencies
dread cap space
wallows and madcap lies

thunder dread
into free base *******
****** stashed
ear whips hang heavy
over methamphetamine doorways
trick old school pop magic
boneyards and blood slaves
into pornographic wailings
and forked tongue ravings

mass detentions scroll herrings
morph into mambo shoes
heavy with dread and indolent eyes,
fanatic forays into iridescent causeways
silent toe tapping emphysemic love craze

battles backbeat lunch meat
sweets love box
with propped up
hand grenade doorknobs
parlayed hand to mouth paydays
wrapped up in
left coast screams and despair
shoot through
dimebag closets of fires
All wrapped up
in any fraud god you desire

The whole worlds gone crazy
It's mad and I'm tired of it
I'm tired of corrupt politicians
Lecturing to me about values
I'm tired of nuns, guns
Jesus freaks and new age messiahs
Here to expound on truth
And show us The Way
Bad faith blowhard risk frauds
Who condemn to death at least
700 good faith clients a day
I'm tired of performance theater churches
Stocked with well groomed, attractive preachers
Who sermonize peace and eternal salvation
to sadly misguided seekers for a price
And all those phony smiling
Narcissistic bent ***** *****'s
Who at the start present as so nice
I'm tired of Wall Street bankers
Government wankers
As far as I'm concerned
They're all full of ****
I'm tired of it
I’m tired of US federal govt hypocrisy
Their lock em up and commodify
slave wage labor for profit philosophy
I'm tired of our never ending war based economy
Propaganda disguised as education
An uninformed, distracted population
Elected officials bribed
By flim flam corporations
Fabricated news spread
By partisan hack organizations
I'm tired of flicking through the channels
And seeing ******* hucksters on my tv
All those good christian government officials
Spewing racist fictions about refugees
I'm tired of the 5 o'clock news
Adds about feminine freshness, dependable douches
And all that I can't believe it's a bra ****
Hell, I'm tired of eating fried eggs
I can't help but think
That's what my brain must look like.......

Market street
Bloopers in blue uniforms
Flat tops and red noses
Pontificate from soapboxes
To cantankerous clowns inciting protest
Bar brawling streets ignite a haversack generation
Of tattoos and hypocrites
That feast on double shots and cigarettes
Trying to control the uncontrollable
Nowhere man struts alone through Jonestown
Tripping over his tongue
While smoking his mind
Through yesterday's glass pipe of sorrows
Television, coffee bean synergy
Reluctant paraphernalia
Intravenous meat living to the beat
Of an empty drum
Raz a ma tazz
Reactive
Inactive
Suffering serene serfs
***** by the hunger of a lost youth
The sequencer of the sequential runs wild
The freedom bird flies
Sings songs for the senseless
The senseless sing along
Presidents and prisoners have *******
Equal in the void
The ******* queen whets her lips
Seven against Thebes
Rorschach tests refute Walt Whitman
Festivals for the oppressed
Youthful vigor gives way to Korsakoff’s syndrome
A diseased reality of horned rabbits
Whim wham whining
The universal ******* takes refuge
In the autonomy of the city
And I am the rangefinder
The random man
A teary eyed son of the Buddha lands
Looking for a cheap peep show

Once again sleep eludes me
my body refuses
its warm embrace
heads a little cloudy
awake 3 days
2am headcase mode
cats fight outside
their high pitch
ear splitting shrieks
massacre silence
could hear a pin drop, prior
a slice of light steals through
a tear in the curtain
hits the wall
like a swords edge
then darkness all around
henry passed today
i kept telling him
he was too old to
be doing that ****
bonnie found him
hanging in the closet
she’s in the hospital
says she cant breath
hell, none of us can

empty streets
echo of lost voices
bloated and reeling
sunlight drips from the heavens
retreats into the ether
darkness fills the air
the cold winds cruelly mock
a suffering of which I accept
a price I’m willing to pay
and all this simply put
the weighted cost of vice

All is turning cold and grey
I await the winds embrace
Yet, I cannot escape this darkness
Fear flows through me
Like shards of glass
Each piece sharper than the last
I sit in dank rooms
Stare at vacant whitewash walls
Through eyes as hollow as my soul
But there’s nothing there I care to see
Hands so unsteady
Heart pounds in my head
Can't stop the voices
They swirl like vacant dreams
But say nothing I want to hold onto
My requiem for madness
Spins a lonely tale
Of fractured moments
And empty spaces
The turning point of yesterday
Started years ago
Can’t pretend it’s not so anymore
It's hard to live
with deaths obsession
It waits silently
Out there in the night
Sometimes the water
Too wet for my essential face
Refuses my reflection
And sometimes
My absence frightens me

the night air is empty
silence ricochets off headlights
and dances down broken city streets
darkness haunts disgruntled alleyways
littered with beer bottles
bent spoons and needles
drunken slurs lash across puddles
left behind by crying clouds and angry skies
no one ever looks at anyone here
myriad eyes focus on shoelaces
stumbling  hands entrenched in pockets
mumbling cries of paranoia heave them forward
each to their own personal abyss
human cries like howling dogs
whimper in the distance
police sirens and lights dot the night
as a half moon rests atop boarded up houses
without a care in the world
soon the sun will rise
as i find my way to much needed slumber
comforted by noises of the city
in which i will die……..

I am revolution
a confluence of self propelled
protoplasmic revelation
the synthesis
of infinite cataclysmic events
my fingerprints bleed anarchy
i have no form in the void
i am an atomic convolution of rebellion
bound by space time
and wrought by the primordial ooze
out from which i crawled
i am a direct result of phenomena
completely beyond my control
my mind a battleground
for eons of evolution
i exist as a continuum of volition
that ebbs and flows
indiscriminately toward an oblivion
that precedes and succeeds all
i am a confabulation
of electrical impulses
a web of synergistic energy
that incessantly battles forward
toward an indeterminate horizon
meanwhile
universes postulate inside my skull
strumming the strings of my cranial guitar

The sun breaks through
the window like a thief
You sit and brush the night
from your tangled hair
I watch each movement
so familiar
I wonder at your beauty
and how it never grows old
As my my mind wanders
to the night before
The way you looked
As i walked through the door
So beautiful, so unaware
You are preparing for your day
You will kiss me goodbye
go get coffee, do hot yoga, and run
all before your day really begins
Once you leave i will shower
get the newspaper,
make myself comfortable
And brush the dogs coat
Later I’ll head to my
favorite watering hole
To pontificate life and death
with people i hardly know
The stories will be funny or sad
The little stork like lady
will tell the same story she always does
The stale scent of yesterday’s *****
still coursing out her every pore
I will put money in the jukebox
And laugh at all the same places
The usual crew of derelicts
will slide in just after noon
We’ll all shake hands
and do that manly hug thing
I’ll order the first round
from Zach the bartender
Who is never happy
and always lets you know
I’ll nod my head like i’m listening
We’ll play pool, darts
and drink our day away
I’ll look around and know
once we all had dreams
and if i try hard enough
i can taste the sorrow
But i’ll probably just grin
and daydream about your smile
I’ll head home in time
to beat you there
Grab some flowers
and your favorite meal
light the candle on the table
and chill your favorite wine
You’ll come home
and tell me all about you day
Sparkling with beauty
like always i will get lost in you
And follow your every word
And when i look into your eyes
I know that no one
In this whole world but you
Could ever wear their skin so well
And when you look into mine
Like you always do
You will know
just how much i adore you
That my love for you has no end
There are miles of tongue
in this lonely city
And so many shattered dreams
There’s so much sadness in the world
But this sadness I’ve never known
from the time that we first met
When you leaned in and whispered
What is it that you’re thinking of
And I looked at you and replied
You’re the most beautiful woman
I’ve ever seen
I hope your smile is not a trick
Baby I could look at you forever
Your the reason my heart sings
I pray this lasts a lifetime
Regardless what tomorrow brings

He sits alone
atop a stool
bolted to the etheric floor
of a barbed wire room
Stares at his haunted reflection
A particular and demonstrable gloom
bounces off a soul cracked mirror
into eyes not recognized by those eyes
sunk into and renting space on his
roadmap cracked face
Song on the radio howls and growls
“Blood on the rise, it’s following me”
peace frog dances deep cut gems
Blood flows out pockets
Bullet to brain innuendo
Hidden shadows fight
in darkened corners
calling for rockets on sight
For everyone to delight in

I sit in sad café’s
Slowly sip gin, sedate myself
Watch vacant whitewash walls
Raindrops drizzle through
The torn awning out front
Like lonely teardrops
I think of a girl I once knew
Identify with fingerprints in the hall
I scan the room for possibilities
That always seem to turn the other way
Long legged honeys, miles of tongue
And smiles that make my brain weep
All poured into a plastic cup
That rests on a table by a book
I’ll probably never read
People gather in small clusters
Drink their coffees, their mocha’s
And chat about their day
I sip from that plastic cup
Aching to forget about mine
There’s an empty seat across from me
Haunted by the ghosts of dead friends
I listen carefully for their voices
So distant now
And wonder if I ever really heard them at all

There is an emptiness
A cold dark place
Someday it will overtake me
But not today and not tonight
It lurks in the shadows of my mind
I can feel its lingering presence
As old as any memory
An overwhelming void
I’ve lived so hard to hide
I’ve drank and drugged
And ****** and thugged
And sold my very soul
But the darkness on my shoulder
Continues to whisper out my name
As it’s coldness rattles my weary bones
And in its shadow all life wanes
I know someday i’ll lose the battle
Can’t stop the fading of the light
Someday it will overtake me
But not today and not tonight

I dream in the essence of blue
Soar into the starry night
I Excise the phantasm of original sin
Move slowly to a beat
Laid down by the jazz gods
Torn from their sharpened bite
I float on heavy air
That cradles my being in waves of sound
Music rages through my body
As I slide down on the wings of angels
And Spin between notes blown in heavenly delight
I morph into space
Float gently by the sun
Lost in the love of all i see
And taste and smell and feel
Can this be real
I am a changeling
A songbird who blows his tune
And howls his madness to the moon
I feast on gentle staccato rhythms
And casually dance as the willows whine
So go ahead and bow before your God
Because i choose mine
Not so much a holy being
As a cosmic note played out in infinite time

the city is alive
on every street
on every corner
on every person's breath
from the ghettos to the graveyards
a host of martyred memories  pave the way
they’re getting high at the gates of city hall
the cannabis heroes
******* their way
through contagious clouds of euphoria
and grappa handshakes
the dream elite smatter down broadway
steeped in the radical
a sallow skinned man thumps his bible
while **** jesus rages from his forked tongue
long legged honeys in tight shirts
and short skirts
saunter down sidewalks
like cosmopolitan documentations of grace
busy walkways garrulous
with nicotine stains and hard-ons
engender a throng of philosophizing junkies
who spit a material language from rooftops
that echoes off an expanse
between austerity and madness
cosmic layers of protoplasm
and pornographic revelations
fashion gestalt ****** and love parades
a vast dream machinery
of wet pulsating components births
a jamboree of internecine warriors
who drip like mercury
through time and space
etching out their own evolution
poetry readings in coffee shops
tai chi masters and rock n roll slaves
punk rock chicks in fishnet stockings
and combat boots
hang out in doorways dancing like fools
a half-baked guitar player in a train station
screaming for a fix
a whole lost battalion of  nobody’s
sniffing through the gutters
eeking out their cause
and through it all
I sit watch groove and know
RIGHT NOW
WE ARE ALL ALIVE!