I'm always within and always without
Nothing but an old soul drifting about
Without doubt I'm glad to be alive
But I feel like a zombie brain dead I can't even open my eyes  
I'm losing my mind in the depths of time
Every time my memory loops and gets stuck on rewind
It fills my head even more with doubt
That I'd ever have a loving wife that cooks and cleans house
My heart has been broke so many times
And some of those pieces I've chosen to leave behind
Trying to escape reality by putting mental blocks in my mind
All these feelings got me wanting
To go out and commit a crime
**** the time I got enough of it
My clocks stuck on rewind
I put all my ******* aside
Wiped my eyes but im to broke now
To even attempt to see the brighter side of things
Visions of halos and angle wings
Illuminate my brain with thoughts of flying soon
Not saying I want to die but I feel as if I won't live to see 42
I foresee all the fake people standing in the room
Morning the loss of someone they never  knew
But maybe they are crying because they lost their chance
But don't cry for me if you didn't even know my pain in advance
This is life and this is what it's like
To be a victim of a sick and twisted system
My body is shallow but my words are wisdom
And I share them with you hopping that  with whatever you are going through
You can stand and finally see the light too

Too often I'm locked in my mind
With nothing else to pass the time
I replay memories of me and you
Like no one else could possibly do
I remember it all, every little detail
And every single flaw
But deep down I still wish I had it all
And it makes me so sad
Because it's the life I know I'll never have
And that's a life with you
A dream that never will
Have the possibility to come true
Deep down I want to hate you
But yet I still thank you for
Making me smile
Every time I see you it's like
My depression takes a break for awhile
And even though I could never love you the same way again
You would be the one I would want to die with in the end