I dreamt the monotony of life as a single moment
and I in my infancy knew of nothing but to retch

Larvae burrow into the eyes of children but it's just part of his plan
if true hell is reserved for my kind where is it we now stand
divine beauty is cited while misery is conveniently excused
when making a case for your loving creator these words I choose
brother murders brother while both claim the blood of Abraham
yet the very worst of all his children is this thing that I am
a doubter, my questions unanswered and still I have many more
why should using god given reason be the thing he most abhors
the most vile part of this whole facade wrapped up in angel song
that mans limitless depravity, with god at his back is no longer wrong

There is a stillness here
though I would not say it's calm
there are only quiet things
and the beating of my heart
tiny little changes
and the turning of the clock
monochrome dreaming
and the repeating of routine
there is a stillness here
though it's not the kind I dreamt

The deep ones all drown in a sea of uncertainty
while in the shallow pools vapid ones quickly find dry land
all this from a difference I dont understand
These young ones who are born alongside epiphany
yet long to hear deeper tones from the throats of their peers
will count away months with empty ears
The true ones are few just a dying breed rarity
you'll know when you see them wondering eyes open wide
with minds always hungry and spirit satisfied

Oppress depress and rearrange
now disavowed and over strange
reflect object my own ribcage
conceal reveal and act my age
deny imply and storm the gate
repulse convulse I love your hate

She disregards regard for all those simple things he sees
he redundantly drones on about the things they'll never be
she stares out at the world wondering where it's been so long
he looks inside himself to see where everything went wrong
she wished he would get better for the better part of years
he who only stood there sinking, in a sea of all his fears
she gave all she was willing still nothing made him whole
he left too little took too much, her body mind and soul

With motley colors unbroken you rearrange
until words plain spoken grow and change
unbent by convention unbowed by kings
reinvent a connection with all living things
watch on the sidelines or stand up to shout
following guidelines is not what it's about
own the voice that sprouts from your lungs
it reverberates a choice from the center of one

This form of diet consists of nothing cause I'm trying to close the gap
between a place that's almost something and the place where nothing's at

Among the stillness unafraid, there all alone I found my fear
unannounced the burden laid, the form was wind inside my ear
amid the whispers and the doubt, I spoke to reassure the pith
a waste of time from seed to sprout, I gave my power to the myth
in doing so I claimed some strength, foreseeing failure in advance
selling short removing length, it seemed a safer route than chance
so I leave it to my better self, wherever at the strong wind blows
to see it clear in better health, a true prison's always self imposed

If your heart devoid of dogmas rests upon your will alone
yours is life it stands to reason yet you're more than bones
if your soul holds all the answers seek no master let them go
yours is love and human longing so spirit you shall know
if your mind is set on helping it matters not what you believe
yours are hands with aim behind them allow them to achieve
and if your body holds the wisdom do not see yourself as vexed
yours is sleep in need of dreaming, dream this world before the next

In pools as black as midnights gaze
I lost myself to fervent haze
a lady no, but through and through
ensnared was I in eyes of blue
she was fond of broken things
and I in search of words to sing
met her there upon the edge
of what is known and what is said
we as one to dance and play
at things that only grownups say
til time and life and all it seems
would overshadow childish dreams

If full of brackish our thoughts belie
soft spoken regret or indeed deny
remaking the gladden into slow dreams
and trading the truth for what may seem
while trees felled alone will make no sound
I would run nonetheless if I was still around

Coalesce in moonlight as the hour of the wolf passes, transcend it all at midnight her lithe body thrashes, transmuting daylight into fervent cries, and appropriating passion for the open skies, evoking the lover in hopes of knowing truth, though she's alone in a home with her dreams of youth

I see with my own eyes intensely, consumed and unaware.
though for brief moments I see with yours, and I stare

Corpses grind forgotten bones
to realign them all with homes
empty whispers in hollow ears
that funnel wind all through the years
a life of listening is wasted time
blind your eyes and close your mind

Dreams alone break bones with no intention
yours too is see through just like your reflection
crave new with blood blue you taste the season
make real lies you feel and renounce all reason
drink in these sins then forget times intrusion
latch tight to fresh life and command more illusion

The strong scent of the old gods still lingers here
they were many in the forests and the rivers clear
their spirits once held power we could not contain
now they're hardly more than shadows in mans domain
we conquered every corner in hopes we would thrive
though you see, without the wilds we can hardly survive

I am a shadow of a thing, mewling many years, to find the here and now
I wept and passed the days, until I took this form. set within a mold I never thought to make, but the months did soldier on, one upon the next
until nothing of that me, could sense he had been born. though I surely am and always was, this thing I call myself

Taking in this poison has become our daily lives
we're so caught up in living, we've forgotten to survive

Awaken if you will, to words you spoke in jest
in dreams you took your fill, and left me all the rest
hearken if you dare, to the wisdom you once knew
of swansongs and self care, both of which were true
archaic, sound the thoughts, but strings all seeming pure
your heart's been many things, though none of them are sure
awaken fore you burn, and then try and coax yourself
for the roads all twist and turn, on your journey out of hell

These memories echo in shades of perfection,
of which I'd know little, if you were still here

I unwittingly wander like a river to wind
not seeking a center just the piece of a mind
I unknowingly dabble in this thing and that
in attempt to make sense of the place I am at
I unassuredly stumble then walk on my own
from stone static past toward futures unknown

If by way of water I could see you where you sit
I'd take hold of the oars and commandeer a ship
if upon the open air I could hear the tears you cry
I'd leave the earth behind just to seek you in the sky
if beneath the mantle, your love had gone and died
I'd dare to delve the center and open you up wide

I always sell myself short
                             so I wont be short changed

I saw an aging man inside his meek and slender frame
and was reminded at a time that he and I were both the same
our arms each strong as any man's and voices always sure
though everyday walked farther from the children that we were
he carried on his face the look of half a million tears
yet also there were smiles I'm sure he'd found throughout the years
as I watched, I dreamt of loss and what it means to die
it was then he saw himself in me and the youth that passed him by

This skin is thicker for having been hurt
my body heals quicker from pain of words
our eyes see clearer when opened wide
keeping enemies near, to hear their side
I can learn of myself from those I despise
we must walk many paths to become wise

The words of broken hearted cherubs who've lost the want and will to live
fill these halls with sounds of sorrow, as if sad's the only song there is

Tell me a story or speak the truth, travel back to forgotten youth
awaken the innermost self and free, build an effigy cry your plea
plant some seeds, ponder growth, tear down walls or swear an oath
but stain the page that once was white, free your demons.......Write

In the dark of the nighttime, papyrus well lit
these embers of imagination are bright where I sit
by spark of the dreamer whose words I read
dead for many ages yet renewed is the seed
planted in the fertile reaches of my mind
wisdom handed down for posterity to find
I hear plainly these voices, deep as they are sage
and thirst for the knowledge contained in the page

Espoused to the moon was the lady in red
she who only kept secrets inside of her head
many have perished in search of the key
that would unlock the center they all hoped to see
deep in the forest at the heart of the glade
in water half frozen alone she would bathe
to battle her demons and test her will
her beauty entranced all who sauntered those hills
just echoing laughter on a sweet path they crossed
now they'll wander forever yet never be lost

I only hope to die slowly
shades of my former self
gathered around
smiling at time while it's
shifting before them
knowing that once lived
is better than gone

Emancipate yourself from all the questions of the mind
build a little box for all the ugly things you find
eviscerate all logic from equations that you write
and if the truth looks at you hard then hide it it plain sight
once you reach an impasse try ignoring all the signs
Emancipate yourself from all the questions of the mind

make a tithe of your body and I'll hold it in place
make a lie of your smile and I'll smile at your face
make an ounce of sweat, equal gallons of blood
make a mirror of my being, now I'm not who I was
make a whisper that echoes as my silence is still
make patterns of the chaos, or if you want, I will
make a trance that I'll live in, if I wake you can cry
make a box for misgivings, then I'll give you the sky

Wake up from slumber brother where is your mind
uncover rubble slumberer the truth you've yet to find
raise your voice up whisperer the serpents coil poised
they strangle at our throats, and we've yet to make a noise
smile knowingly devourer the earth is nearly reaped
wake up from slumber brother, lest it happen while you sleep

My name last uttered by stoic soldier pines
they watched me devoured from under lines
my breath last coaxed by a lady all in white
of beauty she would boast and toast my sight
my head last held by a willingness to burn
eyes closed slightly I could not discern, the lessons
I held tightly from the ones I truly learned

Bend a wave of light from the summer sun, and then smash it on the ground into tiny bits, a kaleidoscopic creature known as none, is gone and not one around you even stopped to notice it

Rain in moonlight harvest bright
wane at midnight fog and light
bent reflection comes in waves
spent directions hang in space
hide in shade lightning flashed
cried the glade for fire and ash
see the fir and sleeping pines
trees that were in blackened lines

I certainly adore, who I believe you to be, though I'm not half as sure, that you're for certain she

Awaken saints with tattered robes, do his work around the globe, I feel your presence even now, as sweat upon my furrowed brow, atone for birth and wretched life, but absolution has a price, so lead the flock I'd expect no less, though all must pay your wage in flesh

Waste your cheap whispers on hollow bones, and forget all the blisters that got you home, blacken the chimney with warm sin, by skill very nimbly conceal within, and when it's frigid in winter and snow drove, you will still be gathering splinters for your old stove

You bleed me and break me to lovingly remake me
you love me you hate me I wonder if you'll take me
you know me and get me but in a way you regret me
so you bend me and crease me just to release me

I love a bag of water she calls herself a queen
she gave me many daughters and wanders like a stream
I love a little puddle she feels she is so deep
she frowns upon the grass she's killed and sings herself to sleep
I love a muddy river I had hoped she'd take me home
but she thought a little talked a lot and cut me to the bone
so I love an empty bottle that catches morning dew
transparent as she seems, I'm still unable to see through

You would stand in the water just to muddy it up
such a terror to wade through if you're easily stuck
invent ways to view them, then tear down the stars
in the dead light of others you can see what you are
weaving delicate words arranged to attract sweet prey
but soon you snare yourself in webs and things you say
half of what you hear and speak has always been hot wind
still you with two glass houses see yourself without sin

Keep your body far from mind
the self at the center of all this
in case you ever chance to find
a thing you've tried so hard to miss
awareness always close at hand
but for fear of knowing all that's true
seek it blind misunderstand
shape the world and misconstrue

Dip your dark quill into a vast ink
draw forth anomalies to make me think
drink in the night just to spew it back
in a shape unfathomed by those that lack
those eyes which see and know to burn
and bring form to lessons aptly learned
come the dawn I'll wonder at deep words
if your voice in the dark was truly heard

There's nothing for them here, but years and hollow doubt
they've tied with lace and empty space, like ghosts to move about

I stand upon the ledge forever, but never stop to dredge up time
I'll jump the ledge of all endeavors just out of reach to leave my mind
to smoke and dance away my troubles, though doubly sure I hope you are
for amid the dusty din and rubble you'll see my remnants scattered far
though I tend to let my branches wither and shiver in the winter cold
yet never have I been so bitter except at thoughts of growing old
my empty eyes that dart and wander to squander love where they may go
then if distance makes the heart grow fonder, that's one more thing we'll never know

We smile lovingly at the faces that pass,
for humans care  little for things that last

You wove yourself a silver trap of shiny silken strands
so that once they'd turned their backs they'd play into your hands
and I've heard the night is blackest when trapped inside the loom
the air and water's brackish and there's hardly any room
who'd withstand such wondrous weaving's leaving naught to chance
so we all fall one by one into your deadly trance