I want to spend summer with you
to learn how your touch feels
and to know the origin of your scars

I want to make you smile
to wipe your tears
and be the only thing you miss

I want to watch all your favorite movies on repeat
to listen to your heartbeat
and to play with your hair

I am tired all the time
and want to just lay on my bed
with nothing meaningful in my head
but then I think of you

and my eyes
are wet
again

On the bedside table
I find just a an empty tissue box
beneath the bed hidden pair of used socks
so I just stare at the ceiling

trying to figure out
What the hell is this feeling
trying to remembe the last time
life actually had a meaning

If I just stay like that
maybe the bed will swallow me
definitely the easier option
than again trying to be

Is there without you
any
me?