My first love was you, Jesus
My loves was you
In the darkness where i stood,
the lights were off
my heart was dim
And as u got closer i pushed you away
But you never gave up
Because  you love me
and wanted me for you
And with your love and your mercy
you won me over form the world
And you gave a name and
you turned around
You gave a new destiny
I was destined for death
I was destined for misery
But gave me your life
And no am destined to eternity with you
I am destined to your purpose
And i will always love you
Because you loved first!

(Please read entirely)
Her life began to become the dark room she always ran away from
The memories in her mind were the reminder of who she was
The times she spend in the darkness of her room,
Were now the reminder of what she became
And the sparkle in eyes,
Were only captured in the pictures of a younger age.
She tried to hide it with a smile
With a nice compliment
With a positive attitude.
But there were times when she was alone,
when she couldn't and didn't,
want to think
or remember
and much the least,
she didn't want to let it become her present
But how could she find a way to erase it from her mind
How much must she do,
to let the memory die!
It might have taken many things:
Suicidal tries
Drugs
Alcohol
All types of pills
and anything
Superficial
like cutting
and self-hurt
it didn't matter how she tried
or who she was,
She let the memory become a daily nightmare
She let it become an obsession
Until she met someone
He wasn't like the others
He wasn't like anyone else
Because no one else did for her what he did
He was a king,
and became a peasant for her
He was the ruler,
and he excepted rule for her
He became hated,
and loved his enemies for her
She rejected him so many times,
Yet he put his life in for her
When she found him
She was too blind to see him
So he gave her sight
When in the water she was cleaned
And she wanted some to talk to
he gave her his spirit
so she could hear him
They talked together
In a language that only he could understand
In a language where her true feelings,
were the words that came out
She had no need for blades,
No need for pills,
No need for nothing else
She was free from the chains
Of lies
Thievery
Hypocrisy
Hatred
*******
and many more things!
He gave her everything and his name is Jesus
He is the father of those who need him
The son on those who want him
And the holy ghost for those who must hear him
He is the only things she needs

When they tell you
-let it go
Tell them
-have you tried it
When they tell you
-give them a secong chance
Ask them
-have you given it
When they answer no
Tell them
-that is.the next step
They will answer
-step for what?
You say
-to tell me what to do
Sometimes its hard
And people will tell u what they think
But they hvnt gone through the problem
But, there is someone who has!
God
Cuz if he let the problem be there
Its for a reason!
And he never send u a problem without
The solution...

Someone said
"Ask Jesus"
"He forgave those who put him on that cross"
Some else, said
"no sense"
"you can only forgive those who apologize"
and lastly they say
"HAHAHA"
"Justice in vengeance and vengeance is not forgiving anyone"
I wanted to believe "them"
But "someone else" had a point
"They" judge everyone without considering
the background
the past
or the situations
"Some one else" excludes those who never ask for forgiveness
Like the boy running away after stealing food
Or the girl who fought to defend her brother
Who to ask for forgiveness
the victim or someone else
"Someone" said everyone
But that is hard
Cuz you see, the thing is...
He hurt me,
She destroyed me
He embarrassed me
She humiliated me
He took away my innocence
How to forgive
"someone" says-
"They will respond to God"
"You will too"
"Why hurt you for what they did"
"If you don't forgive don't expect to be forgiven"
"They did wrong,
haven't you?"
A sin that's a sin is a sin
Little, small, big, or huge...
Upon the Lord they are still sins
Forgive, if he could why cant you?

Reality seems like a arch word...
It the difference between what you want and what is real.
Pretty ovious too.
Reality is the sword you have in your hand and you choose to mark yourself with.
It is similar to Pandora's box
You choose to open it
Taking that risk and continue figthing
Or leave it and just walk away
What are the possibilities?
Dissapointment, or releif
On the way to opening the box
Your imagination goes crazy
Thinking the worse so you dont get surprised
and the best hoping you wont get hurt
The truth is,
It is scary
To look back in to the darkness
and remember
Those times when your life was changed
Remeber the white in our clothing
slowly turning to a dark red
To later be the reminder of a lost fight.
The truth is, that it is going to hurt!
But staying back is not worth it!
Because yesterday is Yesterday

Why?
Why would I matter to someone like him
He has so many people following him
So many willingly there
So many people with a better past
A better point of view
Why me?
Who am I to see his glory.
I am his daughter.
The daughter of God!!!