my sour stomach
my sweetheart

my nurturing heartache
and my revolting larvae wardrobed butterflies
lifeline impart

spiderweb lungs and a heartbeat which ticks
ticks
tricks

i skipped a beat for you
and i skipped every last one after you left

you left me free
because my past died when you perplexed

with a million to choose from
my sweetheart i'd always select

what's it like to be loved
to be the first person infatuated with in the morning
to be caressed
to be kissed
to be sweatered in kisses and blessings

what's it like to be loved
to be nurtured
to be the illuminating brightness of someone's day
10000001 lumens for you
to be the initial current which spins the motor of life

what's it like to be loved
to be loved
to be cared for
to be admired
to be listened to
to be ....to just be
to be accepted

i know what it's like to be loved
but these days it seems like a dust covered, degrading artifact of a long forgotten civilization
i'm just waiting for my archaeologist to come brush and restore what once was

to hold up a cinderella cloaked daisy
to tenderly sense its petals sandwhiched by your fingers
to watch it die in a undernourished watering vase
rain has not fallen here since sinatra's excusrsions to a gleamish, ruby light toned flapper club
as a flapper holds her poise , you hold the stem of this daisy
your grasp it only to suffocate its xylem, collapse its walls as a canyon has boulders barricade it's river, it's desideratum
watch the petals wear a dress of frailness
watch them lose their sheen
watch them circulate ailments
let them rest in a place deprivingly serene

to **** a daisy
watch its yellow sun centre
die
your pupils dilate
as you manically squeal with mouth shut joy
to **** a daisy
you can always just pick another one
and make it your scapegoat of a toy

you truly are the stupidest *****....nonono that would be too easy

******* ******* born with a mental brain deteriorating disease

a grashopper with no legs would be more competent than you with hopping through trees

trisomy of the 21st chromosome seems ordinary to you

you are pretty .....******* stupid hahah lol jk

you are beautiful but ******* grow some ***** and make some intelligent calls

so a ******* ****** prepubescent man child does not drive you up the wall

you're willing to get abused in a trade off so you do not cut him loose

every second you carry on you already lost

as every second cotinues to count you are a lost cause

heart born with freedom
blood flow through my ventricles late i supercede them
like a hailmary through my bool stream
blitz my arteries with cholesterol teams

face planted
cheek slanted
girlfriend panted
and my ******* neighbours ranted

how come when i go too numb
face hit **** floor
i got overthrown by a concrete ***
back in the alley with stuck up confetti messes of chewing gum
until i become so numb
until my heart sore

heart died with freedom
**** these ventricles i no longer need to redeem em

in you i see stars
i see rage brought upon by a banishing black hole

in you i see the milky way
the rings of saturn i propose to your fingers
and my asteroid belt which comes undone this evening
meteor showers i scatter upon your eyes

but you are the andromeda
a galaxy distant from mankind
one we study yet one which is pulled away from our eyesight
you are awaited discovery and display awe

i began to know you as red giant, free and strong
but now you become a white dwarf in my eyes
just awaiting to be pulverized into a heap of a meltdown
with the possibility
of lighting up and giving us the glimpse
of
andromeda

for some reason more than a little reason
today i feel at peace
for some emotion more than a devouring emotion
today i feel serene
for some feeling more than you i'm feeling
today i feel whole
for some devotion more than my self devoted
today i feel with you