Rain falling, it's really pouring.
People fighting inside the house.
I'm tired I didn't get much sleep, I'm surprised the rain usually makes me sleep.

Hasn't anyone ever told you that you can write?
Has no one ever said write me a new write?
Sad princess of emotion.
I was in your boat too.
I was an iceberg.
I was cold.
I was grey.
And I overcame.
You will too.
I promise you.
All that you have to do is look deep inside you.
I promise it didn't leave.
Don't beg..don't plead.
I know all there is to know about hot and cold.
It's inside my soul.
Follow me I will guide you.

-Jennifer DeAngelo
Copyrighted 2016

I stopped writing when I was 8, because my mom said I was no good.
Words are powerful, by her saying I was no good I stopped writing.
I never thought I would pick up another pen and write a poem again.
But I did write another poem again, I started writing again when I was 12.
I stopped again a year later when I was 13, the year I started self-harming.
I really thought I would never write again.
Until I was almost 14, a teacher I had encouraged me to write again.
I couldn’t imagine not writing now, I don’t know where I would be without it.

My body has bruises from you hitting me.
You should see my heart though; it’s broken because of you.
I don't know how much more I can take of this abuse.
You said you loved me, I believed you.

I witnessed a carousel of twinkling lights
Songs of nature filled the clear August night
Wet grass cooled each step
Two stars fell from the midnight Heaven , I made two wishes for Mary Ellen* .....

I once knew a girl that I couldn't take home
We shared the same likes , hopes and dreams -
but we were doomed from the start
Fell in love for a young lady from Alabama ,
then we kissed , smiled and broke each others hearts* ...

I had a bad night last night.
Texts from my mom saying grandma should raise me full time.
She said she will take me to probate court and sign away her rights as a mother.
Is she a mother? Could you really call her that?
My mom said it’s better this way for all involved.
It’s better for her if she wouldn’t have a daughter anymore?
My mom told me that my dad has missed me, he wanted to pick me up and bring me back.
My mother said I know you aren’t happy at our house.
You have lived with your grandma most of your life, of course she is going to make you happier.
Who’s fault is that? You sent me to grandma’s house when I was little because you didn’t want to deal with me.
My mother thinks I hate her, she acts like I haven’t made any effort to fix things.