I'm dead,
Exploded bits with action potential sticking around
Always dreaming of some stallion that I'll never be
What do I do for humanity?
Nothing.

I'm pulling at straws

She lays on the floor of her little apartment
And asks me to rub her back.

Her mom isn't home right now.

Out of our mouths come happy bubbles of conversation
But they came out of her poisoned past.

We get to messing around,
Now I've got things to brag about
And I'm almost ready when she asks:

If she wasn't already trying to fix things with her man,
Would I date her?

Do I love her? Do I love her like that?

I tell her the truth.

The truth about where I am in life right now.

The truth about what I've learned.

And I tell her
That I'm her friend, and that I care.

And she is sad,
But I am proud of myself.

I don't think you know which direction,
Surrounded on every side
Sides that bleed whenever you take a step
Sides that blame one another for being sides.

Sides that are ultimately delusion,
Sides that come together as a whole.

But I just don't think you know which direction,
Doesn't anyone understand what I mean?
When you exist as an array and a spectrum,
Which direction should you try?

Should I go ahead test God?
But it's arrogant!
Should I let myself be odd?
Do you dare me to?
Should I try to live straight, avoid sin?
Oh you're so far above me now, with a path I was never able to follow.
Or you're an intersection of reflections of my own life which I can remotely access in the present moment.
Should I listen to The Starting Line?

I am what is apparent,
And I am resolute.

I wish you'd step aside and let me shine,
I wish I could do what you do.

And how could you even do that?
You said you did something different.

I just don't know
And I'll never have proof.

someone tell her she's pretty
because she doesn't think she's pretty--
a linguistic sin deep enough to cause lacerations,
so stop tearing angel skin.

but my inert heart has been far from heaven
for some happenstance kiss to take
and yours was searching for a place
to plant a garden,
well i made it hard to.

and you got red in the face
when the squash came up blighted
when the weeds conspired to strangle the hydrangeas to death
when i sold strawberries the insects
and i was inside, just scrolling on my phone

and when i told you i was quitting
you turned over the turnips
dirt was flying everywhere
you're gonna make me regret it

but you should know
all these years i fancied myself i gardener
i think i might be more
of a *******

These eyes have changed from
Boyish circles
To triangles with their backs to each other

The impossible must become the simple,
Infinity must meet economy.

Give yourself to yourself
And set free
All the innocent prisoners in your soul
Because the world has enough of them.

You have spun nothing to glory
Do it again and again til the wheels stop turning.

The expanding universe brings death, but also doctors:
Moments in time where transcendence takes hold
Secured by love
Yet it's bought and sold

A standard that was never gold alone.

I've had to carry weights and let them go.

I've been making love to a world
That holds a knife in my brain.
She says "change"
And gives me the love of death.

When you're crazy
Those ideas
Seem pretty
Important to you.

we don't need it
we can't use it
it's
JUNK

we don't like it
we don't want it
it's
JUNK

so how is she gonna live like this
when she didn't ask for all this
JUNK?

if you're anything like me,
please,
do us all a favor and
calm the **** down

about ****. about everything,
just in general.

you need to calm down.

chill out. idk. something

I am going to the temple to bleed.
I am raw. I am set to the mark.
I do not apologize for being me.
I will not let death happen to me.

I am going to the temple to bleed.
I will announce my love for you there.
I don't know what it means,
But it's all that I have.
I am heavy as I make my way there.

The spirits around
Make unsettling sounds
But the wavering's never me.

The one that I love
Gazes back into me,
Whom I came to the temple to see.

i have stained my skin
it's rosy red
collecting slow, the pool of blood
come dip your proboscis in

but save a little,
just for me
so i can ******* morning tea
so i can dance to one more song
so i can say i love you wrong

sarcos, sarcos
come and play

but don't you ever break a bone

This radio static is like a thousand tiny kisses on my ear drums,
A memory is just a tool,
A romance is a dream come true
And I am allowed to eat today.

Some truths hold the mind hostage
Holding their gun of an empty infinity
And asserting themselves to the universe,
Despite its constant ignorance.

Like a smooth black pebble in a garden
Giving undeniable accents,
Playing music that was surely heard.

You twinkle black, like me
And I like that.
I'll drop your black song on my black tongue
Like a black throat lozenge.

Plagued by self interest
A resentment complex
Well my universe is autistic
With stimming stars, and

Can you go the distance
To realize self interest
Is quite all around us?
You're such an investment

But I do, I know the thing.
I must reach out from me
Narcissistic and mean
Yes I know that escape

But you swear you are saner
My own little world
My own little world
Don't show up on my threshold
With these things
I almost learned!

Unless you mean well.

Twilight man
Follows and leads
Thinks and is thought
Fights and is fought

He's wrestling demons
They come in waves

Sunlight came
And went down the drain
But he's fixing the hole
And it's making him smile

The silver ball sits serene by chance
The same size as the sun
What an interesting dance
Twilight man.
Takes strength from his stance
And he's saving his age with grace

im tired already
i cant initiate things well
i shat all over myself
i feel
it's time
to go back to bed

Verse i

It's strange how we were forced to be a man.

I know you only change because you can.

But...
Relinquish me,
I know life's not what it seems,
You said it best:

It almost feels
Like I've been here once before

Relinquish me
I know this is all a dream,
Let me go--

My ****** forehead
From pounding at the Door

... (break)

I'll just wait for time to spell my fate.

"We're made of nothing,
And everything's the same."

He noticed I was naked and ashamed.

I see them wearing clothing,
I find them very strange.

But I'm still looking for another way
Oh, I'm still looking for another way

Chorus

Relinquish.
It was the first time that I ran out of your blood.
And the scraping will get worse...
So relinquish.
It was the last time that I took a stand for you.
Now I have to take a fall

If you say you don't love me at all

If you say you don't love me at all,

Relinquish.

Verse ii

She don't wear makeup,
She likes girls

Check yesterday,
When she was my world

When manifested,
Love feels right

But something's wrong
In paradise

Now I'm thinking of the...
Crown of brown hair
And the callous on your finger.
All the wilderness in you,
Pray the taste of it may linger

If love feels right, then it's good, and I'll accept it
He's not carrying the light,
She's not taking no exceptions.

No

She wakes up early
Cigarettes

She grinds too hard, man
She's a threat

Her salty skin will
Leave you blue

Cause boy, you never
Had a clue

Now I'm thinking of her
Crown of brown hair
And the callous on your finger
All the wilderness in you
Pray the taste of it may linger

If love feels right, guess it answers any question
He's not carrying the light
She is vested in resentment.

You,

I understand why you hate me.

You,

I do.

You,

I understand why you hate me.

You

I do, i do

And I'm thinking of the
Crown of brown hair
And the callous on your finger
All the wilderness in you
Hope the taste of it may linger

If hearts have hands, we could conquer any moment
If I lost my way
Maybe someday you could show me

Crown of brown hair
Callous on your finger
All the wilderness in you
That the taste of it may linger

If love feels right,
Then it's good, I will accept it
I'm not carrying the light
She's not taking

Exceptions

My veins slowed down
My mind drained out

My guts are still
In working order.

Around the trunks
Of eldest trees
I'll stretch them out like streamers

And gladly throw one kidney to a lake not even looking

The other to a pack of dogs
Man i'm not even kidding

All over Earth i'll throw my guts,
An alabaster basket

And maybe yes i've lost my mind,
But it goes well with brisket.

Let's get illumination curves.

I don't wanna bear witness to this whole scene
Without a taste of the real thing.

I fell asleep in the wasted west
The sun welled up in its present and disparate springs
And revealed a current form.

I'm at the finger-twisting river's middle
Never mind the sweat on my brow
As I fret that I do nothing but roughly contemplate some path of action
Waiting to strike out, how?

Never mind that now,
Gotta find a way,
A better way out.

The first step i took was a step,
It wasn't nothing
And i made the most of it

You said it was good and i took your word for it.

Now i'm thinking the good things are bad
So take my confusion and set it on fire--
I broke your heart and the only way back
Is to take
That first step
Again.

You are bounding music spilling over into chaos
You are noir petals unfolding beneath my skin

You are the guiding hand of a storied man
And a baby nestled in the warm crescent of a mother's arm

We have become our own insanity,
Built up walls of denial are wearing away as we blow the wind

The distance between us is shrinking and expanding
Time and space tore themselves apart, just for us

Godless wretches swinging through the cosmos
We feed ourselves a good story
But even good stories aren't free
But maybe it depends on your perspective.

Trying makes it harder to let go.

And this letting go, it
becomes important.

But you say it's not time to call it quits.

I guess I should just get over it.

...

And make a stab... in the same back
But please don't look at it like that
That bears the cross I constructed
Are you adopted or abducted?

Are we intelligent or stunted?
A changing truth within a moment.

But if I have to try, I really should
I guess that good can beget good.
And triumph over every evil
I don't really feel betrayal
You warned me about everything

If I have to try, I guess I could
I'll write a song, you'll say it's good
And then we will turn inside out
But I don't care, it's worth it now
You warned me about everything

Now everything is warning you.

My love makes it harder to say 'love.'

We're fighting for a perfect tense.

I feel like it's time to call it quits.

You cannot stop my freezing core.

So make a stab, you can have that
Cause I'm leaving and not coming back
My ego's gone, and I hate it
Now I'm feeling like an old computer

You could come a little sooner
But you won't, of course it's fleeting

But if I have to try, I really should
I guess that good can beget good.
And triumph over every evil
I don't really feel betrayal
You warned me about everything

If I have to try, I guess I could
I'll write a song, you'll say it's good
And then we will turn inside out
But I don't care, it's worth it now
You warned me about everything

Now everything is warning you.

I'm not stable
The tide is coming
I can feel us dying
It was perfect timing

And you said it better
No I don't deserve you
Baby, happy birthday
I'll be here on your worst day

And if I have to try, I'll try to let this go

So I'll cling to paranoia;
I'm already thinking twice

//

Demons do affect an innocent soul

//

I feel like the sweatiest egg

//

Come on,
Think of all the people you've betrayed!

//

My name is monster food
Or just "monster" for short.

That's what I see in a rose, anyway.

i'd like to apologize to anything i've ever said i loved,
for the more horrid form of suicide which i have committed,
and am committing right this very moment,
and that is letting yourself go.

now my love means something strange
and for each diluting moment it spends in purgatory,
it feels more half-assed.

can you tell when we're chilling and smoking after the party,
and my eyes stay furrowed the whole time,
never rising to a round and even conclusion?
i think god's got me on a string
and it's attached right between my eyes,
i'm always worried about something
trying not too list too hard to the side
trying to engaging,
fun.

i'll do better next time.

Gaiety's a sin
We like it in the iron maiden
Anything, at any point
From some angle
Draws the ire

On that point we're more solid
You know, I'll always be your girlfriend
just technically speaking
But any future jabs you make
Seem false. Yes, I seek impunity.

I feel I may be overreacting--
Maybe a dose of paranoia?
Because if I'm just slowly melting
Maybe offense has dissolved also

But maybe I should be committed,
Or, maybe I should be committed
Give my tongue to the cat
Unless--
She's dead and solenoidal

In my idle state
Evils percolate
Irritations at the waking
This is hell in the making

I bystand as serpents charge the throne
The subject who stood by
And no one knows why
But he froze

The flickering characters of my life
Flying up and down my halls of my sight
And now the tape is running faster
And now the world means less to me--
Objectively and subjectively.

Too fast, too fast
Operator's drool drips overhead
He wants to smash the silly toy

Something that you know is good,
But the layers peeled away
Stripped down to her very naked purity
She bears herself,
Infinite,
Reflexive,
Eternally widowed and made to re-marry
She breaks you down
She makes you a man

She ruins you

A sour soup of chemicals
Makes life acidic, astringent
To the bilious mind of an addict.

The half-witted steps were stolen,
Stolen from the floorboards!
But not without a great moan--

They never asked to be involved in any of this.

My lord, my lord
I don't want to be king
A peasant, a peasant
A peasant I'll be!

I'll live in the swamp.
I'll live under a log
And try not to bother a soul.

But under my log
Would be very clean
And you'd be quite surprised
I have all I need!

To run my own kingdom
Of me, and just me
But lord, oh lord
I don't want to be king.

The stress of running
Everything
I judge to be too much for me
I'll help along your Majesty
But lord, oh lord
I don't want to be king.

Why run so much of the world through me?
I shan't be trusted, fuckey old me
I'm dumb, I'm crass, and just... **** me

Lord,
THANK YOU Lord
That I'm no king.

My brain is rocked.

I feel it listing,
But it's mad confusing
With so many sides in the sea that float
And take on water.

And take in beers,
My motivation crouched inside
Trembling with fear.

When life makes me angry,
I want to rip a hole in my jugular
In the center of my hometown.

I watched the wind pull gossamer threads apart.
Something deep inside me shifted uncomfortably,
But for the most part I just stood and stared.

I don't want her hair ******* up my mornings
I don't want her kindness to make me sweat anymore
I wish I could pull all your memories of me
From your mind
On a string

The wind blows seeds and leaves
And yeasts and plastic shopping bags...
What winds will I dance with before it's all over?
A different wind from lovers lost--
But for the most part I just stood and stared.

whatever fell between your fingers
falls to nothing, just like you
remember before you were born?
had you any hope or truth?

any wisdom, sharp and useful
built for man, and to what end?
on and on the something, something
not a lover,
nor your friend.

Wheels are spinning that I don't want
Whirring, parts are wheezing
Lubricate this, chuck that
Tinkering all day long...

But when my fingers touch music
I become human
I am composing
Something wonderful

Won't you be my lover?
We are vibrating that fifth dimensional string
Deep beneath
We are something
That wants to be felt
So dearly

Strings of crazy words
Match my messy bedroom
Will I ever get my **** together

discord, i want to reach in the ***** mirror and tear your guts out
i want to hack apart your face with the axe of righteousness
the axe that would be someone else's life
someone else's time
you've gone astray
there is no fixing you today
i want to end my reflection
i want to waste away

Do I mean that?
Are you me?
Did i give myself layers I have yet to attain?

please leave me Angel
unfold your sun
deconstruct my body
in a world that's never done

knives do caress me
and they shine brightly, Love
always does its best to see
the seed through the blood

we reverberate insanity,
simplify this
once united with black
i am pregnant with this

so we're more than a man
but i heard you're enraged
well he's all we can be
and the ending is strange.

please leave me Angel
my desire is pain
and the Life that's inside me
is heavy again

(solipsist,
recurring
but i lost my receipt
so they say we're psychotic.
wow, that's pretty neat!)

Your only love is a lie,
Lost, weary, dejected
A broken toy

Your only time is a waste
Black, stupid, dull, depressing
Watching fake pixies flying by

Tripping *****
Balling fists
We were not great
You were great.

Your only choice is the axe
Hack out your flowers,
Furrowed brow

The only things you want
Are the things you're not allowed.

We were selfish
That's what we always said.

We are divorced now,
And never meant to live
On the inside
Of anyone's poor head.

how could i spend time wisely
but stars come whole and never in fractions
they burst all at once
and never suffer loss because
what they are is just a chain reaction

and yet i feel shame
to suggest I shouldn't is to find something to blame
to behold a daisy is to prefer it
and to prefer it
is to destroy it

And the beholder's eye sacrifices its own artisthood
to receive full credit in the form of false witness
the barren wasteland of the soul opens up
and yawns to swallow it

or yawns to yawn
and turn another page, the book is bound in my spine

My cape
Is tangled round my neck
What the hell are you doing
In those tights?

You're a freak
But I kind of like your style
Let's meet up tonight
On the edge of town

Oh some things go down better if
You got a sense of humor
Tell that Joker I've been waiting
To get my punchline in

Some things just don't need an explanation
Yeah, fall out boy and I
We got it figured out

Some things call for heavy celebration
After we save the city
Let's just burn it down

Some things just don't need an explanation
Yeah, fall out boy and I
We got it figured out

Some things call for heavy celebration
After we save the city
Let's just burn it down

Well after all
I'm just talking to myself
They never took this kind of fight
To Superman

But it's alright
I locked the devil in us up tonight
I guess technically
I'm dancing with him, yeah

Oh some things go down better if
You got a sense of humor
Tell that Joker I've been waiting
To get my punchline in

Some things just don't need an explanation
Yeah, fall out boy and I
We got it figured out

Some things call for heavy celebration
After we save the city
Let's just burn it down

Some things just don't need an explanation
Yeah, fall out boy and I
We got it figured out

Some things call for heavy celebration
After we save the city
Let's just burn it down

I got you
You got me
Let's let loose
On the scene

There's no looking back
When you're living for a moment!

I got you
You got me
Watch my drink
I need to ***

There's no looking back
Oh yeah, you're really cool

Some things just don't need an explanation
Yeah, fall out boy and I
We got it figured out

Some things call for heavy celebration
After we save the city
Let's just burn it down

Some things just don't need an explanation
Yeah, fall out boy and I
We got it figured out

Some things call for heavy celebration
After we save the city
Let's just burn it down

your cackle echoes through a troubled mind,
long shadows touch each other's corruption.

I'll turn you off
So it doesn't hurt-hurt
Hurt you as much
To, to turn the lights off
Lookin' for grace, i

Will turn you off
So that it doesn't hurt you
Hurt you so much
To turn the lights off.

I have spent my whole life thinking and wondering
Never really living.

I don't know if you can be trusted
To have children.

But I'm here and I'm queer
I'm not leaving til it's over
Lucky me, I'm all crimson and clover

Take me there, take me down and berate me
Twist my arm, hold me down and just hate me

I am not the reason.

I'll turn you off
So it doesn't hurt-hurt
Hurt you as much
To, to turn the lights off
Lookin' for grace, i

Will turn you off
So that it doesn't hurt you
Hurt you so much
To turn the lights off.

Don't be such a ******* now,
You've got a nasty attitude
Don't you tell me you don't have a choice
We said you do

So you go off on your crazy rants
I don't care, not in the mood
Well I'm the one who wears the pants now
Babe, we're both getting *******

And I am not the reason

I'll turn you off
So it doesn't hurt-hurt
Hurt you as much
To, to turn the lights off
Lookin' for grace, i

Will turn you off
So that it doesn't hurt you
Hurt you so much
To turn the lights off.

You're so whiny
Hey you're so whiny!
You're too sensitive
Well you're the reason!
You're a loser
No you're a loser
I'll take you out of this world!

I'll turn you off
So it doesn't hurt-hurt
Hurt you as much (if I hurt you, baby)
To, to turn the lights off
Lookin' for grace, i

Will turn you off (well I said I'm sorry)
So that it doesn't hurt you
Hurt you so much (we're both sorry, baby)
To turn the lights off. (Now i'm SORRY)

I've skittered off the race's side
At least in part,
Submitting scribbles to the sea

"Won't you commit to me?"

And yet, a lamp I held alight
Will guide us through this whirling night
The stars, my eyes, and tested strength
The art of life, and cough
Time well spent

Day's decline on the leaves,
Gilded hairs on the eaves
Of your eyes, facing west
How you break on the crest.

On the edge, on the edge
Streams wind to me
All the love that you gave
The mind as a haven.

Day declines all the leaves
Heavy eve breaking eyes
And the house falls apart,
It collapses my heart.

On the edge, oh the edge...!
Streams are winding from me
All the hurt that you sell...
The mind as a cell.

The amazing art you do
The amazing art you do
I could make some art me too
I could make some art
I could try real hard
Me too

Lucky rhodopsin
Here comes October
They didn't need to be fiery
It's a happy accident

Lactic acid--
For all the right reasons
Churning and burning
Through all four seasons.

Notice all our forms
Passing through
They're sure and they're sharp
And they all stand true

The sumac's proud cones
The retreating turtle
The dew on our shoes
And a nice crape myrtle

And if my hands get cold
I'll just warm them up
Thanks for the soup--
I'll put it
To good use!

I bear the child of ****.
I only want what you can't give me
The fissure grows in my wombless corpse
I am a man who is a cursed woman
Male genitalia are just selfish weapons

I bear the child of ****
It is not an ordinary child
It an evil thing that should not exist
When you are all perfect
My child and I are mistakes
Bearing a kind of impossible stigma

You always have your reasons but it's always unbased
The power you wield over me is out of place
Stop boasting, stop acting like you're stooping to treat me nice

I bear the child of ****
God's act of kindness was a selfish thought
I never wanted everything I got
I bear the child of ****
I bear the child of ****
I bear the child of ****

some days my head feels
like a loose baby molar.

don't rock, don't, but
rock it with your tongue.

IF it feels good, take it on!
THE joy of life is waiting
BRAKEMAN, come creative, please. With
TURNS of consolation.

MY heart will find its bedrock
WAY down, where we forget.

BY the way, she's beautiful, and
BRIGHT, with smiling

EYES.