Somebody Nobody

Somebody Nobody Jul 2017

I'm that person who's always smiling.
I'm that person who's full of smiles and giggles.
I'm that person who's always willing to help.
I'm that person who thinks of others before all else.
I'm that person who's always excited.
I'm that person who sugarcoats everything.
I'm that person who always takes the worst **** that life throws out.
I'm that person who no one will ever take a second look at.

I'm also that person who's the loneliest.
I'm also that person who seems that they're hiding something.
I'm that person who has a false tone of happiness.
I'm also that person who's shed the most tears.
I'm that person who's the best liar.
I'm that person who's only called for help.

The most colorful are often the bleakest.

Somebody Nobody Jul 2017

The Illusion of Hope

I've been shattered
countless times,
each time cracking in a different way.
Every time I pick myself up,
every little piece of me,
I always pick up a little hope.
Hope that everything will turn out okay,
hope that I'd find someone
or something to save me.
It always comes crashing down.
I've hoped for so long, that I'm starting to lose it.
I'm losing hope
in getting out of this miserable state.
I then realized,
hope was an illusion.
A simple hallucination in my mind.
I've never had it,
and I'll never get it.

Somebody Nobody Jul 2017

Faking It

I've mastered an art, truly one of the most useful.
I've shaped an image of myself to others, but it's just an image.
I've mastered the art of lying.
I'm a fake.
But no one else can see it.
I hate doing this.
I hate wearing a mask everywhere I go.
I seem carefree on the outside.
People think I'm truly happy.
They don't know how wrong they are.

Somebody Nobody Jul 2017

Bleeding out

I'm bleeding out.
I've been shot countless times, with insults and glares.
I've been stabbed with rumors and lies,
I'm hiding everything through a mask that makes me seem carefree.
I act as if nothing's a big deal anymore.
Not one of them knows.
It feels painful to try to get up.
So I just lay here, waiting to die.

Somebody Nobody Jul 2017

The best days ever!

Having everyone around in the morning,
Everyone ridicules me without warning,
Love fills my day before it has begun,
People in my life shine brighter than the sun!
My desires have to be put aside for theirs,
E**very once in a while, they care!

Somebody Nobody Jun 2017

Nothing

People don't listen when I talk to them.
Their eyes, always looking for someone else.
Their arms, always limp and at their sides.
Their ears, always tired from listening.
Their breaths, exasperated sighs.
So I stopped talking.
Nobody really noticed.
I watched from afar.
I always wanted to be a part of the group, but I had no place at their table.
I was always alone.
No one came to talk to me, look at me, acknowledge me.
I was nothing.

Somebody Nobody Jun 2017

I can't sleep

I can't sleep anymore.
Last night, I just stared at the ceiling and thought.
I went with the negatives first, but they were all true.
I tried to think of the good next, but none were true about me.
I'm a pest.
I've tried so hard to keep hanging on, but I can't.
Not anymore.
I felt something wet on my face.
As I tried to wipe it away, more tears just came down.
I cried my heart out in a dimly lit room, alone, and not any one of the people who knows me will ever know.
I've already tried reaching out.
But I can't take it anymore.
The image I've set up for others is crumbling.
But no one bothers to look at me anyway.
I've got nothing to fear.
I can't sleep anymore.