Skyler M

Skyler M Dec 2021

I’m just a product
Of all the trauma,
You raised me this way,
Carry some blame,
Cause I’m holding the shame.

Messy rooms,
Unmade beds,
Dry showers,
Crusted plates.

I’m just romanticized,
You can fix me, I’ll be a prize,
And you’ll hug me and love me,
Till the next time I die.

Messy rooms,
Unmade beds,
Dry showers,
Crusted plates.

I can’t see my floor, anymore,
My room is becoming my tomb,
Just wait I’ll be out soon,
And you’ll see my rat’s nest,
Of disgrace and unrest.

#depression

Skyler M Dec 2021

Looping

I don’t know how to sing,
But it’s all I want to do,
And the floors give way,
To a whole new song,
I just can’t sing along,
Cause I was right the first time,
My voice still sounds so wrong.

Meshing together in a single spiral,
A passion-driven thought,
That’ll wrestle with logic,
I’m hooked to the fight,
A looping paradox.

Skyler M Dec 2021

Exposure

Captured lights steaks of these cars,
Post them up all over the highway chain-link,
Asking 'Which one of these blurry angels would save me now?'
But I know, if they love me as much as they love themselves,
Tell Lucifer I’m on my way.

Skyler M Dec 2021

Saving Face

I’m splitting into two,
Two halves of a whole mess,
Breaking fast to the cliff edge,
Shouting back to save face,
But I’m losing it, I’m losing face.

I’m a terrifying beast,
No more than 4’
Weigh less than paper,
Fighting against the wind.

I don’t feel like myself,
I invite this sudden change as a victory,
Cause I’m saving my grace,
By moving away without a place,
To stay.

He’s haunting me and he loves it,
He’s taunting me and he loves it.

Skyler M Dec 2021

Liability

Now I’m no genius,
Just barely passed high school,
Couldn’t get through college,
And I can’t keep a **** job,
Maybe I’m being dramatic,
Or maybe you’re a ******* ****.

“You’re not disabled, you’re just a lazy ****”
Burned into my head,
“You’re not a man, you’re just manipulating us”
Burned into my head,
“You’re not suicidal, you’re just selfish.”
Burned into my head.

I’m whatever you say I am,
I don’t own anything when I’m here,
Can’t handle your ****-eating grin,
Want to knock your teeth right out,
But I’m too weak,
I’m burned out,
And I’m a ******* freak.

Good luck, bringing me home.
Cause you won’t see me anymore.
My seat will be empty for the holidays,
I know that you won’t care but…
Everyone else will.

Skyler M Nov 2021

mom's drunk and I'm ******

It's late this night,
We're not in bed,
And we're lit by the fairy lights,
You're in date clothes,
And I'm in my pajamas.
Speaker's turned too high,
It's okay though.

I just hate to see you this way,
You're swaying but not for the music,
And the light in your eyes is dulled,
Cause the toxin is in your system.

I'm getting tired,
You're telling me things,
I can't understand what you're saying,
So it's goodnight,
Cause it hurts to see you,
The thumps upstairs are scaring me.

I think I hate drunk people,
I really hate when you're drunk,
You said you'd never get drunk again.

-

Skyler M Nov 2021

To The Past

I can't go back to that ****,
Maybe I'll forget the time,
Cherish the worst of it,
Looking up at the pine.

I take a ride again,
Deep through the forest,
Ghosts scream in vain,
Well, I guess here's a toast,
To all those who died in pain.

Time always passes me by,
As I'm caught in the trap,
I can't help but begin to cry,
No guide to trust with this crap,
Only could say goodbye.

I take a ride again,
Deep through the forest,
Ghosts scream in vain,
Well, I guess here's a toast,
To all those who died in pain.