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4.1k · Feb 2018
Write
Skyler M Feb 2018
Write
Simple,
I tell myself,
Write
Poetic,
I force myself,
Write
Beauty,
I convince myself,
Write
Imagery,
I encourage myself,
Write
with purpose,
I plead myself.
Skyler M Sep 2018
do you know,
what it's like,
to hate yourself,
but not just your face,
your entire body.
you look at your skin and it's much too pale,
you look at your chest and it makes your eyes bleed,
you'd gladly rip those out, pain and all,
I've considered it before,
to **** myself up so that they can be gone.

when your face doesn't match,
the way you wish,
then your voice interrupts your speech,
and you hate it so much,
you hate it so much.

you hate it so much.

you hate it so much.
you'd gladly go mute,
to make sure no one knows what you sound like.
if I'm lucky I might get them all gone
but I don't know how one can stay sane with all these flaws.

My chest hurts,
it hurts so much.
my body hurts,
it hurts so much.
My chest hurts,
it hurts so much.
my body hurts,
it hurts so much.
because of these,
alien things on top of me,
get rid of them for me,
won't you please?

dysphoria
days nights and years
dysphoria
days nights and years
days nights and years
631 · Oct 2017
For You
Skyler M Oct 2017
We've reached the end of the earth,
Where the ground has dug up by centuries,
I'm taking your broken wings and hanging them up by the door,
When the lights fade,
And you're by my side,
I'll be hold you up,
as I drown in the dirt.

There's nothing like it now,
The feeling,
Of knowing you have my eyes,
You're guiding me home,
From the black forest.

Can you feel the midnight?
Creep into your veins,
I'm keeping them from red to blue,

For you.
615 · Jan 2018
Just One Question
Skyler M Jan 2018
The question I have for tonight,
Is a simple one at that,
It's aimed for my head,
And the thoughts locked inside,
I picked the words carefully,
Like threading through a needle,
They are quiet,
Barely heard,
"Will I be alive tomorrow?"

Cause I battle every night,
Knowing that I just might not,
Make it through the inspection,
I do on my brain,
It repeats until I don't have a conscious left,
I can't breath.
Help me.

The battle between one side and another,
The demons and the angels,
Every night it gets darker,
Until my hand isn't being controlled by me,
It reaches for things I never want to see,
It skins things that I had hoped to save.
It repeats until I don't have a conscious left,
I can't breath,
Help me.

One more time,
I inspect my brain,
Write the words over and over,
Think of something better to say,
But there's nothing so I put it simply,
"Will I be alive tomorrow?"
Skyler M Feb 27
Nearly over,
Nearly defeated,
Nearly there,
Or nearly here.

Almost gone,
Almost broken,
Almost shown,
Or almost grown.

Bordering time,
Bordering death,
Bordering blood,
Or bordering ledges.

Now alive,
Now ready,
Now built up,
And now looking up.


The past builds to the present.
509 · Apr 1
That Special Miller
Skyler M Apr 1
You can bet I've broken so many metaphorical bones,
You can bet I've collected so many cursed tokens,
You can bet I've been selected to get my head shacked, she said depression,
I said repression,
Cause denying makes the truth all the more shady,
And then I've shaken to fading on the daily,
I'm a killer of a very special Miller,
Or perhaps that was the killer of me.

Now I'm a special boy,
Taken and shaken around like a toy,
You can confirm my death with many people,
Those who build steeples and feasible sentences,
I'm a prototype of a man,
Just watch as I ran to the sand underneath the sparkling grand moon man.

Take me up into the wind,
Bring me to the sinners den,
I will take his rusted hand,
And escape without a stand.

You can bet I've murdered so many beasts,
You can bet I've ruined so many well-lit feasts,
You can bet that I've introspected, to the point where I've retrospected into the infected past,
I keep on regretting going fast,
You're stuck in my head now get out before I pluck you out,
Tuck and roll to **** at everything that I lay eyes on.

Cause denying makes the truth all the more shady,
And then I've shaken to fading on the daily,
I'm a killer of a very special Miller,
Or perhaps that was the killer of me.

Cause denying makes the truth all the more shady,
And then I've shaken to fading on the daily,
I'm a killer of a very special Miller,
Or perhaps that was the killer of me.
A message to that ***** up I called a father.
447 · Oct 2018
Clay Creations Hold Onto Me
Skyler M Oct 2018
My friend gave me her pottery creation,
A beautiful rainbow cup to hold all my fantastical paradises,
Only so long until I realized that it held all my nightmares,
And the cup was designed to cut my lips as I sipped it's contents,
I was too young to understand, too young to know.

When years later all my walls came crumbling down,
Then the river flooded my town,
My imagination,
My creativity,
My will to fight,
And all my emotions I had hoped to keep,
Washed away within years of living alone inside her home.

I promised myself that I'd never let myself go that deep,
At this point when all my emotions get washed away,
If I had someone like her- I'd break myself back down,
I was strong then and then there's now, where I'm more so,
There was no rules or pay to fly back then but I never understood that,
Not in her grasp.

When years later all my walls came crumbling down,
Then the river flooded my town,
My imagination,
My creativity,
My will to fight,
And all my emotions I had hoped to keep,
Washed away within years of living alone inside her home.

The cup kept on cutting my lips,
Even after the aftermath of devastation she wrought onto me,
Colorful clay crumbling into razor blades,
Stop this now, please stop this now,
Nightly fights to stay home and brood into red stained papers,
I was too young, much too young to understand the capacity of my anger.

But I'm here now,
I see her time and time again,
Her eyes are brighter and she seems better,
I don't hate her but I most certainly should,
When my bones shiver in the past,
I become 10 years old once again,
Fearing for myself and the cold,
Scared beyond belief,
I don't trust anyone not even the ones closest to me,
I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I keep pushing you away,
Bleed into my home and heal me again.

When years later all my walls came crumbling down,
Then the river flooded my town,
My imagination,
My creativity,
My will to fight,
And all my emotions I had hoped to keep,
Washed away within years of living alone inside her home.
435 · Oct 2017
Got to Sleep
Skyler M Oct 2017
Go to sleep
please.
I've got to sleep
please.

The messages in my brain
won't stop ringing and ringing and ringing
but I cannot pick up the phone
cause my hands are shackled to my sides.

Go to sleep
please.
I've got to sleep
please.

The cold war,
just replays and replays and replays
but I cannot push pause
cause the button is gone.

Go to sleep
please.
I've got to sleep
please.
337 · Sep 2018
Go Home, Please
Skyler M Sep 2018
Leaning over kitchen sinks,
Bubbles up my arm turn pink,
I'm pretty sure I'm dreaming,
Thankfully so,
I don't ever want to leave this dream world.
The only realm where my dreams come true,
I'm so sick and tired of waking up with nothing,
The feeling in the pit of me is why I'd like to die.

Don't take my words lightly,
I'm a stupid, teenage dreamer,
I sent myself into the stars but reality is catching up,
I'm not enough and never strong,
So believe me when I say,
Go home.
Go home.

Stumbling over the bulging pavement,
Roots burst through and grab my legs,
I know now that I am dreaming,
Don't stop dreaming please.
Cause when I leave this world,
My demons come after me,
They tell me that I will never make it,
When I'm 18 I know I'm not living anymore.
I'm not ready to build my home yet.

Don't take my words lightly,
I'm a stupid, teenage dreamer,
I sent myself into the stars but reality is catching up,
I'm not enough and never strong,
So believe me when I say,
Go home,
Go home.
321 · Nov 2018
stories
Skyler M Nov 2018
arms and legs
spell untimely stories
just as eyes
are the windows to souls
the scars on foreheads
and the bruises on hands
take home
the stories you dont want told
"you don't know my brain. the way you know my name" -Anathema by twenty one pilots
317 · Oct 2017
Fell For You
Skyler M Oct 2017
I can't stop thinking about that dream,
I know instantly what it means,
You in my arms in paradise,
But do I act upon it?

Or should I let you be the one that got away?
Should I let you play with that boy?
It really hurts my heart to know that I am scared,
of saying the words to you.

I don't have the courage to walk up to you,
Tell me otherwise what I should do,
Should I have another dream to fulfill my means?

I fell for you way long ago but I never told you,
Cause I know the answer above all else,
Maybe you'll see this poem,
And regret talking to me.

I don't have the courage to walk up to you,
Tell me otherwise what I should do,
Should I have another dream to fulfill my means?

I know I lied to you,
about everything feeling that I have,
I just didn't want to lose you,
You're the only one that I got.

I don't have the courage to walk up to you,
Tell me otherwise what I should do,
Should I have another dream to fulfill my means?

I've walked myself into a hole,
Your love has lost himself,
Can't stop talking about the other girl,
That he separated from.

I don't have the courage to walk up to you,
Tell me otherwise what I should do,
Should I have another dream to fulfill my means?

Now I want to fulfill you,
Make you happy again,
Give you something that you deserve,
Even if I can't be with you.
Even if I can't be with you.
310 · Dec 2017
Misty Lakes
Skyler M Dec 2017
A misty lake,
The cold air,
And my cold feet,
Gentle eyes defeat all the demons,
That shadow my lids.

They walk through the lake,
I can't see nor reach them,
But I can feel their breath on my skin,
Ripping and tearing.

I can see the other side,
The green trees,
peacefully standing,
Almost tauntingly.

I can feel my knees hit the dock,
The rusty nails digging into my flesh,
As the tide washes over my burdened back,
I slip away into the waves.

A still heart,
Polluted with suicide,
Darkened from all the infected scars,
I'll be ****** if I say anything.

Perhaps it'll help if I close my mouth,
Don't speak my mind,
Otherwise it'll burn my lungs,
They don't like it when I speak.

The misty lake,
Tugs at my rusted knees,
But the pain from the nails,
Hold me there.
300 · Sep 2018
Keep Me Company
Skyler M Sep 2018
Who’s next?
In this long line of losing people,
It’s going to happen sometime now,
I’m not in denial,
I just want some justification as to why they go.

Look at all the sunsets,
She’s not here with me,
So just keep me company,
Won’t you please?

Sappy morning dew and fog,
Writes out my story on the window,
Let’s leave now it’s time to find more people to lose,
I don’t regret you or your ocean-like eyes,
Cherish every time I fell asleep with you,
Monsters climb out from under the bed,
I really don’t want to lose all these friends.

Look at all these sunsets,
Burning fire like the one inside my heart,
I don’t mind that she’s not here,
Just as long as someone is at all.
Skyler M Sep 2018
::
It feels weird to be alone,
With nobody else in my home,
Can you see the scarecrows,
Lining up to take my gold,
Their greedy, beady little eyes stare through me,
And into the treasure behind me.
With every ounce of my being,
I know I cannot let them get to the pile,
Of all the things I cherish,
I cherish the gold the most,
So don't doubt me when I say that you mean so, so much to me.
::
::
The scarecrows taunt me,
Saying that things will always go wrong,
I can't trust anything that enters my head,
Even my own voice,
So I'm sorry if those scarecrows start to scare you,
Cause they scare me too,
And I don't want to lose you to their vice-like grips,
When the sun begins to set,
The shadows in the corners of my room grow,
Then their eyes begin to glow and teeth grow long,
Somehow they sneak past me as I'm paralyzed in fear,
The voices sink into my treasure,
Tearing it apart one by one,
What do I do?
My eyes have fallen out of my sockets,
I'm doubting everyone I've ever known,
I remember there's a gun in the room next to mine.
::
::
The sun rises and I'm awake again,
Shadows gone along with the scarecrows,
My treasure is intact, but where did my head go?
I don't miss you and I don't care,
This isn't right,
And I realize that the scarecrows never touched the treasure,
but ripped through my body like fresh meat,
Eating through my core while hissing doubts into my veins,
I'm sorry, God I'm so sorry.
Find me and I'll love you again.
::
291 · Dec 2017
Save
Skyler M Dec 2017
Suddenly,
In a momentary flash,
I reach for the sink as it slips away,
I'm on the floor,
Sinking into the molding tiles.

My arms become weak,
trying to hold onto the rope that loops the noose,
I curse and scream,
as my legs give away,
the failing motion of a singular boy.

Disapproving eyes that remember me from yesterday,
they like to yell and tell how useless I am,
how selfish I am,
spinning into nothingness,
A knife in hand.

I hate me, myself, and I,
It's enough to reopen the scars that remain on top of my arm,
they sting but I know I deserve it,
common sense fades away,
I'm left with my pillar of suicidal thoughts.

In front of their door,
they turn their back,
I'm on my own,
Once again.

Maybe,
I'm just meant to be,
killed off and torn away from paradise,
wash me,
drown me,
maybe I'll be saved tonight,
my hands in control of my mind,
new blood without a tear shed from my thoughts.

Who I am,
Is who I never want to be,
and what I want to be,
will be a mask,
a disguise for tough days,
with no God,
I'm alone.
288 · Mar 2018
Ak-47
Skyler M Mar 2018
I saw him at the gates,
Wondered why he would forsake,
Time slows down and I'm running,
Running for my life.
He's climbing over,
Gun in hand.
God, oh why God have you forsaken us?

Bang Bang, down goes my friends,
Bang Bang, down goes the educators,
Bang Bang, down at my feet.

Is this where my life ends?
I'm just only seventeen,
Where will I go when I die?
He's coming for us all,
Ak-47 in his hands.
God, oh why God have you forsaken us?

Bang Bang, down goes my friends,
Bang Bang, down goes the educators,
Bang Bang, down at my feet.

He's at the door.
Am I no more?
I can't see my own two hands.
Tears on my face.
.
.
.
God?
I think it's pretty clear what this is trying to portray. As someone who is a year younger than the character, I can tell you that this is a huge fear when I walk to school everyday. I could die. It's a fact...but...what I'm scared of is the gun. not the man.
284 · Sep 2018
Dreamers
Skyler M Sep 2018
How does the sun shine so bright when your smile shines brighter,
The days are longer again but all for the right reasons,
I don't know how all the things we say end up being the same,
I'm not one to fall in love so soon but I guess I'm just another one of those fools,
How do you understand me so well?

Let's both dream, shall we?
On a couch- in a room with no roof,
Got a view of the stars and there's rockets flying overhead,
That's where we could be, you just gotta believe me.

How does the moon fly so high when you fly higher,
We laugh and keep on walking while the colors keep changing,
Well, I really hope that you're still here,
When I'm alone at night and the shadows grow longer,
And pieces of my skull start falling out,
You're my hope and my dream,
So I'll never leave you alone.

Let's both dream shall we?
On a couch, in a room with no roof,
Got a view of the stars and there's rockets flying overhead,
That's where we could be, you just gotta believe me.

The eyes I need to see are like sapphire stones,
I don't know where they came from,
But they captivated me,
My own soul shivered and put it's hands together in prayer,
Hoping that you'd stay by me for as long as you like,
I don't mind, no, I don't mind at all.

I'll keep you safe inside our burning homes, tonight.

Let's both dream, shall we?
On a couch- in a room with no roof,
Got a view of the stars and there's rockets flying overhead,
That's where we could be, you just gotta believe me.
267 · Sep 2017
Can't Hold Back
Skyler M Sep 2017
Detonate the fuse
Gonna start a ruse
We are gonna lose
Now it's time to break the cues

Can't hold back
Can't hold back

They just wanna live in war times
Never in time to the chimes
They're gonna live sometime
Can't hold back full-time

Can't hold back
Can't hold back

Detonate the crowd
Feeling so endowed
Yelling out loud
Taking a bow

Can't hold back
Can't hold back

They just wanna live in wartimes
Never in time to the chimes
They're gonna live sometime
Can't hold back

Can't hold back
Can't hold back

Detonate the main street
Underneath our feet
Well it's gonna reek
I can't hear any heartbeat

Can't hold back
Can't hold back

Father up above
Sent me a dove
A message of love

Can't hold back
Can't hold back
251 · Feb 2018
The Van
Skyler M Feb 2018
I'm in the back of a white van,
Don't ask me how I know,
I just do.

I think I've driven this van before,
The driver is inches away from the cliff edge,
I ask if he'll drive it off,
he responds, "That's up to you."
I don't understand what he means,
But the cliff seems to enticing to pass up,
The bottom is a mystery to be unfolded,
Even if there's nothing.

I'm in the back of a spray-painted black van,
Why don't you ask me how I know?
I spray-painted the van myself.

I know I've touched the steering wheel before,
The forest at the bottom of the cliff obstructs the end,
I order him to drive off the cliff,
he responds, "That's up to me."
I understand why he said what he said,
The end is something to stumble upon,
Not forced,
Even if there's nothing there.
244 · Oct 2017
One. Two.
Skyler M Oct 2017
Taken two steps,

One.

Two.

Carved two blades,

One.

Two.

Killed two men,

One.

And two.

Two drops of blood on the floor,

One.

Two.

Two eyes pop almost silently onto the wood,

One.

Two.

Two screams, too many.

One.

Two.

Then my vision is blue and red.
240 · Apr 2018
Quiet Nights
Skyler M Apr 2018
If I could be with you tonight,
I'd hold you close and talk you to sleep,
Make sure your light never fades into black,
Cause I know you've already gone,
Yet I can't help but imagine you here.

If I could be with you tonight,
I would walk with you all the way home,
Take my time and listen to your struggles,
Keep my hand in yours until night fades to morning,
Cause I know you've already gone,
Yet I can't help but imagine you here.

If I could be here with you tonight,
We would take flight and away,
Into quiet nights when you were here,
Now it's all torn down and I say,
"Yet, I can't help but imagine you here."
236 · Nov 2017
Lovely
Skyler M Nov 2017
Can't you see,
You are lovely,
Lighting up my day,
No matter what you say.

A heart of gold,
That cannot be sold,
Take my hand and more,
We will be able to soar.

Can't you see,
You are lovely,
Your hands are wrapped in roses,
Warming up the coldest of noses.

You won't forgive yourself,
Leaving all your hate on the bookshelf,
Why won't you believe me?

Can't you see,
You are lovely,
The clouds are a shade of pink,
But still you rethink.
For my best friend who doesn't believe she is worthy.
222 · Feb 2018
I've Made up my Mind
Skyler M Feb 2018
I've made up my mind,
And there's nothing that you or my mind can do to stop me,
You may slow me down,
You may **** my lights,
But I will continue with the same passion as I feel now.

I've made up my mind,
To do something better than now,
Staying up until the early morning,
To dream of better years and nostalgic memories.

I've made up my mind,
I want to play keyboard,
And get up onto the stage,
To pour my words into the speakers,
Just to let people know that they are not alone.

I've made up my mind,
Even if I crash and burn,
No matter how much sludge,
I won't be a slave in a non-profit job,
I won't be stuck inside my own head,
I'll explore the world and see new things.

I've made up my mind,
I hope you're coming with me.
Let it be remembered...that on my 16th birthday

I told myself I'd do something more in this world.

I told myself that I'd ignore all the adults and their doubts.

I told myself that I can be better than this depressed head.

I told myself that I can make a change for the better, for myself and this world, even if it's minuscule.

I hope that when I'm 30 years old...I can see this again and smile,
because I was successful...
Just maybe...
But we'll just have to see, hm?
214 · Sep 2017
Consider Me Gone
Skyler M Sep 2017
I set a fire
The time was dire
My mind will expire
The night goes haywire

I'm wide awake
Feeling the heartache
I can feel you forsake
Sitting by Mr. Lake

Tell me I gotta be one way
Drain my soul and turn me gray
Like your filthy ashtray
I cannot stay

Consider me gone
Consider me gone
211 · Oct 2018
Alternative Thoughts
Skyler M Oct 2018
Vertical, horizontal,
Pen that escapes my mind,
Bring back bones that I meant to burn,
Bring back the energy that kept me alive,
Where will they go from me.

Alternative thoughts mold into a voice,
Chasms call for a parents help,
When all they ever do is deny,
Their kid needs to be perfect and perfect they'll be,
If the time changes and your brain shifts them slowly.

If purpose if all I look for is my mind really trying to find it?
It's hard to think that when the water is black when it's supposed to be blue,
I promised that I'd be happier, that I'd live for them,
But I can't when I'm trying to figure myself and my own voice out,
Easy to call me selfish cause It's all you can really see,
Then take a look into my poison cups and see,
What I've been introspecting and inspecting inside of my head.

Alternative thoughts mold into a voice,
Chasms call for a parents help,
When all they ever do is deny,
Their kid needs to be perfect and perfect they'll be,
If the time changes and your brain shifts them slowly.
205 · Dec 2017
1:56
Skyler M Dec 2017
It's almost 2 and I'm looping my thoughts,
Repeated, Reiterated, Reoccurred, Dilated.
Sunken through air and ethereal steel,
I'm pleading for a meal,
To satiate my hunger,
For my eternal grave.

It's 2:00 and I'm finding no answers,
Within my brain,
Scanned, Manned, Retrospectively planned.
And I can't see myself reaping the weak,
yet I imagine myself holding a gun up to my head.
I'm pleading for His touch,
As an unbeliever, heretic, a deceiver,
Strike me down, God, now.
Send me down to my eternal slumber.

It's 3:00 and I'm back at this again,
Racking my brain,
My fretting, betting, setting off,
bomb-like migraines,
Reheat it again and I can see through the forestry greens,
I'm dead, I was already from the start.
So what's the point of lifting my head and making a sound?
I'm on trial as it stands,
Strike me down, God, now.
Send me down to my eternal grave.
204 · Oct 2017
Captured Me.
Skyler M Oct 2017
When I see you turn your head,
I remember the dread,
That ripped through my bed,
Now it's sitting in the shed.
Your eyes had captured me.

As the crow leaves home,
With nowhere to roam,
Better watch my tone,
He's scared of the phone.
Your hands had captured me.

When the sea rises,
Listing all the demises,
Handing in the crisis,
Fighting for no causes.
Your soul had captured me.

Don't let me be.
Gone.
199 · Nov 2018
Battles
Skyler M Nov 2018
I've won,
Flown over the gates,
But still not out of the city,
I've won,
I'm far from home,
But I'm not alone,
I've won,
Skies are bright,
But I'm still fighting in rain,
I've won,
But I've still got battles to fight.
198 · Jan 2018
The Fire In My Bathroom
Skyler M Jan 2018
The fires in my bathroom won't go out,
I blow and blow but they continue to grow,
My heart is inside the sink,
and my lungs are crawling towards the fire,
My wrist are pouring blood,
I can't escape the demons that chew at my ears,
I feel my stomach rotting away.

The fire continues to flow through the bathroom,
It devours my heart,
Flames my lungs,
Burns over my wrists,
Chases away the demons,
and stops the rotting in my stomach.

I realize now that the fire was never my enemy.
191 · Feb 2018
We Write These Poems
Skyler M Feb 2018
I write these poems,
In hope that others see my message and agree,
I write these poems,
With thought and dig deep so that everyone can find meaning,
I write these poems,
Yet all I see continue to trend are the simple, love, and twisted.
I write these poems,
But I get discouraged as I see others like me, who breath words like oxygen and pour it out onto the page,
I write theses poems,
They do it well yet all they have is one like and a look.
We write these poems.
189 · Apr 2
N o t D o n e
Skyler M Apr 2
s l e e p  o n  a  s u n n y  d a y,

r o c k i n g  t h e  c h i l d h o o d  a w a y,

I'm not done yet, not even close.

l a y  d o w n  t o  s i n k  f u r t h e r,

y o u  a r e  s u c h  a  c o w a r d,

I'm not done yet, not even close.

f i n d  G o d  i n  d e a t h  n o t  l i f e,

b e a t  y o u r s e l f  f o r  y o u r  s t r i f e.
188 · Oct 2017
Blame Me
Skyler M Oct 2017
Blame me,
For the knife stuck in your throat.

Blame me,
For the moths blocking the light.

Blame me ,
For the drugs in your system.

Blame me,
For the grave you dug.
186 · Dec 2017
Guns
Skyler M Dec 2017
Heed life's call,
It calls for your beating heart,
That's all,
**** your mind,
**** your guns.

You use your guns to blow out,
Creativity and imagination,
Dare to dream,
and dare to scream.

It belongs inside the furnace,
Now burn it,
The black revolver,
It sits by your bedside.

Terrifying as it may be,
There's a pretender to replace your gun,
Beneath sheets you plead,
Your life on the line,
because your mind won't be silenced.

You use your guns to blow out,
Creativity and imagination,
Dare to dream,
and dare to scream.
184 · Apr 2018
Parachute
Skyler M Apr 2018
When the windows make me blind,
I don't know what life is mine,
Cause I've pretended so many times,
Just keep walking and pretending,
In this body I have to act like I'm not me.

Parachute, save me.
I know you're also just a lost soul,
Parachute, save me.
You got the sun in your eyes and it's pulling me.
Parachute, save me.

Sometimes I wish I could fly away,
I'm stuck on the ground,
Rooted by my history and who I was born to never be,
I just want to get rid of the baggage,
Something no one wants gone.

Parachute, save me.
I know you're also just a lost soul,
Parachute, save me.
You got the sun in your eyes and it's pulling me.
Parachute, save me.
178 · Apr 2018
Ink-stained Forests
Skyler M Apr 2018
The trees seemed to close in on me as I laid in the middle of a clearing, my eyes staring up at the star-filled sky above. My breathing ragged from running to this secluded spot in the woods.
I felt the prickly pine cones under my back, letting silent tears run down my ink-stained face.
I had fought too hard, I wrote everything that I could have possibly done.

“Sing me down from the sky,” I sang to the sky, “All the way from death’s ledge. ” My chest felt heavy, whether it was my asthma or my anxiety didn’t matter anymore. I felt the scars on my wrist itch again, underneath my skin in a way I couldn’t relieve.
The trees were shadows, I could consider them demons but they really aren’t, they’re my home.
The only place I can feel satisfied with who I am.

I spent so many nights lingering in this forest, thinking the cure would be here. A mission for a purpose that would be found inside my head. Of course, I sometimes forget that my head is the most dangerous place to be.
I sat up and pulled my notebook out of the ground, along with a glowing pen. A symbol of my pent up creativity.

Maybe by writing a few poems, I’ll feel better about myself. I know that it won’t work, I need more. I need to have a name for myself, even if it’s just a few people. I want to sing to the forest and watch it sway in joy instead of pity.

I imagine myself on a stage made of bent over trees, the bark is slippery but I’m able to stand.
The people surround me, they are calling all our names. So, the ground holds me up, as I sing my heart out onto the makeshift microphone. My voice echoes and bounces through the greens, I’m finally outside my head, I’ve made it through every night and stood in a place I thought I never would.

Unfortunately, that’s not how life works. I wake up, my eyes once again looking towards the sky.
Again, words begin to spill out of my mouth in a tune, “I talk to myself and the dark grey sky beyond…”
Nothing answers, as per usual. It’s okay, I reassure myself, I don’t need a voice.
I wrap my hands in leaves and pretend that it’s a disguise.

Suddenly- I am home. My ceiling fan above me, whirring softly. My pen and paper laying on my chest. The night was sinking in and I am just as scared as I was the last night...
169 · Oct 2017
Mr. Lake's Wooden Box
Skyler M Oct 2017
He's been haunting me since dusk,
Never left my window still,
I can see his shadow out of the corner of my eyes,
And I will try with all my might to push him off.

"Mr. Lake, will you please?" I ask with eyes full of sorrow
"Boy, you gotta try a little harder than that, cause I got tricks up my sleeve and they will break you down into pieces tonight."
Such a cruel grin he sports.

The night turns it's back on me,
He comes clambering through,
In his hand a box of hands with guns,
"Pick one."

I stare longingly into the guns,
Tempting, it is, but I got my path ***** on straight.
So I won't throw it away.

The night releases it's grip, patting me on the back.
I'm still wide awake,
Mr. Lake is asleep in the chair across from my bed.
Another night down and a million more to go.
169 · Oct 2017
Fun With Rhymes(rap)
Skyler M Oct 2017
I'm bound by the sound
Of my own beating heart, let's start.
Not a battle, but a way to drop and rattle.
It's taking me back up to the top, now, explain everything from the beginning, stop.
Dropped all the pieces in this room, a makeshift tomb.
Twisting names and games.
Through no shame, you gain.
The inevitable urges to tip yourself over all of your verges.
Naming rhymes and taking the climb.
To the undifferentiated child, we can go wild.
164 · Feb 2018
Tonight
Skyler M Feb 2018
Your eyes were so cold, unenamored by your world that was cascading into the sky.
I tried my best to give you what you wanted but I was just a small child.
You were falling so fast and I was watching it all go down.
Behind broken mirrors I could see you hated yourself and everyone who dared to call you family.
Never close enough to hold you but enough to see you were broken,
The drugs and the alcohol starving your system of love and care.
A shell of apathy, a sheep's ghost among wolves.

Now, I ask of you to, let me into your head to take that pain.
You're my friend and that won't ever change as long as you don't push me away.
Now, I ask of you to, let me hold you tight tonight.
Tonight.
161 · Oct 22
Appreciate.
Skyler M Oct 22
Appreciate,
The letters behind your eyes,
Which scribe each and every line,
That you lean on all the time.

Appreciate,
Whatever you've got left,
That's got you smiling,
If if it's got you living another day.

Appreciate,
Your every bite of food,
Which keeps you content,
Even if it's never enough.

Appreciate,
Your life is equivalent to mine and the rest of the human race,
Pretending the smile might be the way,
But I promise that you can live another day.
160 · Oct 2018
Untitled
Skyler M Oct 2018
im asleep on this sunny day,
everything could be going right,
but it's all wrong in my head,
if im to be honest,
im ready to die.
160 · Jan 2018
The Water In My Palm
Skyler M Jan 2018
There's water in my palm,
It's reassuring and keeps me warm,
Even so,
I find myself falling,
Falling into a hole,
I had promised myself long ago,
not to get myself trapped into.

The water tempts me forward to see the rest of the sea,
But I can't take my eyes off of the water in my palm,
Why won't it hurt me?
I'm just as greedy as the rest,
I need the water in my hand,
To feel whole again,
The water has my back and I have it's.

Then again the sand, pulls it back again,
So maybe I can see the ocean from the water,
But my eyes are drawn back,
To the water in my palm and I sigh,
Giving up on regretting the feeling,
It's only hurting the water in my palm.

There's water in my palm,
It's keeping me safe and sound,
Even so,
I find myself falling into it's puddle,
Falling into a hole,
I had promised myself long ago,
not to get myself trapped into.
160 · Dec 2017
Other Side of the Wall
Skyler M Dec 2017
I hear my world run cold,
as everything falls out of reach,
Then I breath my last retort,
My fate now closer than yesterday

Every time I throw the spear,
It harpoons into a brick wall,
Where I can't punch to continue though,
So I cradle my gun,
Hoping it saves me.

The wraith around my neck,
Tugs at the veins,
I'll crack open my face,
To see things the way they want me to,
But I can't and I'm forced back into the water,
Ashamed of who I am.

Every time I toss the rock,
It lodges into the brick wall,
Where I can't peek through to the other side,
So I cradle my scars,
Hoping I make it another day.
157 · Dec 2017
Urge
Skyler M Dec 2017
Eating away,
An urge,
Re-surge my forge,
Enemies ensure,
That I stay inside the tomb I dug.

Fighting away,
An urge,
Faltering words,
Vitally addicted,
To the blades in the wind.

Wiping away,
An urge,
Victims merge,
Inside my head,
And I'm gone.
156 · Dec 2017
Friend
Skyler M Dec 2017
I saw your face the other day,
Fighting the darkness,
Capturing more light.
I talked to you, listened to you breakdown,
Myself in shock, I've never seen you falling down,
So, I'll hold you tight tonight.

Suddenly the night fades away,
You're no longer in my grasp,
You've faded away into the misty air,
My light, my only friend.
Gone.

Scouring my only mind,
For your voice, for your hands.
But I cannot reach the other side,
As I cannot see your flickering torch.
No more.

Suddenly the night fades away,
You're no longer in my grasp,
You've faded away into the misty air,
My light, my only friend.
Gone.

So I hold you in my memory,
Taking it back and rewinding all the sounds,
That you made when you weren't done.
I take that and place it in a friend,
Who I wanna save once again.

Suddenly the night fades away,
You're no longer in my grasp,
You've faded away into the misty air,
My light, my only friend.
Gone.
155 · Oct 2017
Be Concerned
Skyler M Oct 2017
The woods just keep getting darker,
As I am ever so starker than the invincible Mr. Lake,
And I'll the climb to the top of the branches,
So the moon can shine a little light,
On what is left of my life.

Be concerned,
I might have crossed the line,
I will be disappointing to you.

Get myself together,
Twist the vines as I make my way down,
Back to the wood's underbrush,
And the demons make the ground rumble.

Be concerned,
They will be here for me,
My soul will be theirs.
155 · May 2018
-Imagine-
Skyler M May 2018
Right here, in this place,
I will see the things I have to face,
Signing off my lungs to breath deep,
With pen in hand my thoughts will seep,
Forgetting that a cloud will take what I made,
Facing the feeling I feel under the shade.

Is it too late to say that I'd walk you home on a late autumn night,
When the moon is the only light,
Hand in yours so you don't feel so afraid,
Maybe sing you things I made.

Regret crosses my mind,
You're so far yet so near and I can't rewind,
Can't see if there's another way,
I'm just so afraid of what you'll say.

Walk up to your porch and hug you goodbye,
The words at my tongue seem to multiply,
I just want to be truthful but I can't with you here,
I can't let you overhear.

Laying in the warmth of my bed,
Imagining these images with dread,
Am I bad for feeling so down about nothing?
154 · Oct 2017
Hope
Skyler M Oct 2017
Imagine a light,
coming from the end of the tunnel.
That's hope

Imagine your pet,
getting up after being hit by a car.
That's hope

Imagine a child,
their smile from seeing a little candy in your hand.
That's hope

Imagine Darkness,
and you holding hands with her.
That's hope
146 · Oct 2017
Can't You See?
Skyler M Oct 2017
Her eyes are a dying fire,
Losing wars and hunting shores,
I can visualize her breath on the stained glass,
Then I hear the voice inside her head,
Harshly whispering how she's better off dead.

Crumbling into the bed of roses at her feet,
Falling into the emotions and broken bones,
Shouting out from somewhere below,
The crows have her arms now,
They're moving on to her feet.

Where did the time go when you were young?
The viper suddenly struck you down,
Under the stars above.
The midnight dove.
144 · Oct 2018
Approval(?)
Skyler M Oct 2018
I can't hide this much longer,
Can't hold back a lie of a hobby,
I deny something more than that,
When a song inspires me to survive,
I know I must continue to make that song,
Whether I die making it,
Or I show the world what I'm introspecting about.

I hope she won't put me down,
I hope she won't stay silent,
But I don't know what she could say,
I hope she does her best to tell me that I can do it.
But that's the biggest question that hangs in the air,
Can I do it?

Sing into, my heart feels full and I've done something,
All I can do is give myself this,
At this point things are dropping so fast,
I can't tell whether or not I'll be gone,
Without the lyrics moving my mouth into song,
I know I can't continue on.

I hope she won't put me down,
I hope she won't stay silent,
But I don't know what she could say,
I hope she does her best to tell me that I can do it.
But that's the biggest question that hangs in the air,
Can I do it?
139 · Dec 2017
Apathy
Skyler M Dec 2017
Fields of apathy,
In which I'm living in.
A grass of faded red,
My soles walk onto.

Everything feels so fake,
My eyes get bored of this.
Reaching for the counterfeit,
Sitting across the table from me.

Threatening my seclusion,
he doesn't move his mouth.
His eyes are painted red,
A symbol of my reimagination.

It rushes onto,
Onto the carved door.
On the floor.
In front of the animals,
That ravaged my,
own wrists.

**** it,
Rock it back and forth,
Maybe I'll get out of this earth.
**** it,
Rock myself back and forth,
on the floor again.

I can't see myself in the mirror,
I'm drowning in conclusions.
I have made, for myself,
An unconscious lie.
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