of worlds, distorted and tinted with lies and memories by perspective .  the layers alternate between true and false, but no one knows which is which.  all they know is that each is stranger than the last.

(what if all of them are false?)

(what if all of them are true?)

(what each layer is neither, but a muddle of self and circumstances and fog?)

each layer is a labyrinth of time that tunnels in and out of itself like a knot.  people wander through blind and dazed, carving years of verse and murals into the walls in layers, layers and layers of words and swirling scribbled sketches. that's all we are and all we leave - graffiti.  everyone dies in the labyrinth. no exit exists, just another labyrinth with new graffiti. there's no getting lost, at least, when the path you choose is your path and therefore right.

5/18/16
14 days -
"empty love" is a boarded up home flooded in
and drowned out taking all of the things that
makes a home a sanctuary. it wilted the rose
petals, it left the house barren and heavy.

5/19/16
13 days -*
i'm as sober as i've ever been, but the
line still is blurred for me. my toes are
pushing the limits, touching the line,
daunting, taunting, flaunting, *wanting.

5/20/16
12 days -
what terrifies me is that you don't make
me feel like all the lights inside of me are
turned off. something in me comes to life.
it's the whiskey burning my throat, it's the
burning in my heart that collapses the days.

5/21/16
11 days -
something is ripping apart inside of myself,
it is the collapse of everything i've ever built
carefully placed up a house of cards only to
watch myself fall. i am not a good person.

5/22/16
10 days -
i hear the police sirens every time i catch a glimpse
of the white light of euphoria. it is actually the
lights of the oncoming train. it is death.

5/23/16
9 days -
human hands are always covered with bloodshed,
from hearts they've ripped and torn. we don't see
it because it's washed down the drain in the morning.

5/24/16
8 days -
sixty days since we talked. at seventy one days, we
will finally meet for the first time. you will see my
skeletons, the secrets hidden in my ribcage. i love
you so much that it lights my veins on fire.

5/25/16
7 days -
we are large demons hiding inside tiny bodies.
this rib cage is much too small to hide all of my
secrets. all of my deceit lies here rotting, growing
until the stench of curiosity becomes unbearable.

5/26/16
6 days -
this dense ache is becoming so heavy, but i would
still chase the sun even though all i can do is feel
her shine through parts of me every night.

5/27/16
5 days -
on the fifth day in our favorite game, a severe storm
happened. today, a severe storm happened. this is
only the beginning of the storm on north carolina.

5/28/16
4 days -
dare i say i will let you pull the switch and
drop the guillotine, because i trust you that
much more with letting me die. frankly, i
have no intention to continue to live.

5/29/16
3 days -
this might be the occasion that my lust will
burn at it's peak. somehow, i am trying to
find ways of smothering that smoke signal
that many people can't see from miles away.

5/30/16
2 days -
where the light is at, that's where i've always
pictured you. where the darkness exists, i'm
neck deep but still trying to swim towards
that light. everything seems to shrink lately.

5/31/16
1 day -
there is floundering in floral and foreplay, and
a beautiful disaster in the eyes of shakespeare
and hamlet, we are two created equals with
the idea that burning will keep us both safe.

6/1/16
0 days -
these thorns are tearing through my skin,
emptying out every single secret hidden
in my bloodstream. hopefully, none of
those secrets have your name on it.

- kra

in circles trying to figure out centaur spines. thinking about bleeding in the cold green sea as waves crash and collapse against each other like lovers hungrily falling into each other's embrace. listening to old songs I've heard many times before. reading old books I've read many more times before. waiting for summer. not suntan-watermelon-bikini-beachfront summer. mountain-heatwaves-at-home-forest summer. I want to pretend it lasts for ever and then ends. I'm bored, so kiss me goodbye before I leave.

The world is a string of bubbles. Each bubble is a smaller world and within each one is another world until all you have is a tiny spherical sheer shiny egg-bubble holding a person, separate yet connected to the rest of the world. Mostly separate. When a bubble pops another bubble already has encased its contents. When you look through the layers of filmy greasy dream-colored skin of bubble within bubble within bubble within bubble within bubble, reality gets blurred, filtered, distorted by perspective. This is why you can't see my pained grimace when you laugh forcedly and loudly, why I can't see why you're so cold at times. This is why isolation is inescapable.

We try to force out the right words,  past our tongues and out our mouths but they get caught in our throats and we never say anything, silently choking.
Other people always leave you behind and hit you too hard.
I am Salieri to
the cosmos' Mozart.
I guess by now it does not
matter
what I say. You've
probably stopped reading by now.
I don't mind if you have.
I mind why though.
Anyway since you're not here
I'll say whatever. Bubble. Lasers.
Viruses aren't alive, but they ain't dead.
I pretend to be a shark sometimes.
I'm a thief. Don't **** me.

I don't want to be alone