I feel the reason
why we grasp
onto the now
so tightly
is because we’re afraid of it fading away
as if it were a dream
The old looking back on their life
at a way one
adores a picasso from afar
Moonlit eyes
dreamy with tired vibes
Looking back we see
time going by unoticeably like
cloudy skies
and then
all at once
they’re gone
and all we have left is
words to spill from
our doughy lips
Remembering when the clouds were here
freshly bloomed
cottony waves painting our ceilings

I realized i was
in love
with her
when i started noticing
pieces of her
in others
Her smile, her laugh
the way she traced my hands
while we talked
Her eyes would soften
and her lips like tulip petals
frenched words with
her tongue when she spoke
I knew
when i first saw her
that she'd change me
I'd let her break my heart
a thousand times
If i knew the love
her and i obtained
tasted like this

My soul
a paperweight in my body
A tired sack
of dried pebbles and stones
weighing me down
in earthy waters
of moss and soil

How sad it must be
to not feel your body change like
flowers do in spring
Oh how the young lay alseep
one foot in the grave
Wishing to kiss death
on its cold lips

How sad it must be
not to feel happiness
To not bask in its colors
of yellows and greens
To let the leaves
engulf me while i sing

And how sad it must be
to not have you with me
To hear your heart beat
and your ocean blue eyes gleam

How sad
I know that sadness all too well
that dark heavy cloak
that leaves me shivering at night
How sad
My days and nights a rollercoaster
of emotions
dipped in lavendar
and cobwebs
My sweet and bitter days
mixed together like
green tea

How to heal?
Im not sure
But i know to relish in the sweetness
of my yellow days and to swim in the blues
Let it carry me
not consume me