Just lay me down
In your bed of lies.
Look me deep into my bedroom eyes
and off the lights.
So I can wear my disguise.

The truth never comes out in the dark.
That's why we've chosen to be blind.
We're content,
paying no mind.

And we're not okay.
Okay?

Even if you don't exist.
The idea of you,
has kept me going.

Even if it's lackadaisical
with a heavy helping of delusion.
It's better than nothing.

If only you could love me.
The way,
I would love you.
I wouldn't be sitting here
surrounded by flower petals and false hope.
Alone in my thoughts, I've found the garden to be the loneliest of places.

I've carried your worry
for so long.
I'm starving for ambivalence.

In a dog eat dog world.
There are no winners.

Only cannibals.

My mind is a tornado.
Whipping through my thoughts,
on an endless loop.

Distorting memory and fantasy and blending them together.
In a warm drink of fuckery.

I'm smiling right through you.
With a thousand yard stare.
I'm doing fine.
Just a little manic.

Casually accepting
we're living in a dystopian nightmare.
We've been training for this moment.

Years of all this
chaos and fuckery has aged us.

When will we wake up
from this fever dream?
And at what cost?

There's no coming back from the cliff we've been pushed off.

We are the hive mind.
A collective of self depravity.
Wrapped up in Pandora's box.

Like ants climbing into their hill
Descending deeper and deeper into the hell they've created.

Are we any different?