He could deny himself the whiskey and coffee
the tango and foxtrot
the ruffles of red and purple
But never the sweet sting of Loss
No he let himself feel that
Swallowing the lead and charcoal
He sat in the yellow , burning ombres of Agony
And he cuddled with it every night
Woke upto the Face of Invisibility
And one evening
In a Parisian Bar
He said with a smile

"Water and Pain
I could never deny myself the pleasures of water and pain '

I dont know how to curse
i dont believe in karma
But they have my words
And i know my words
the nightmarish witches
They never obeyed me
My disobediant Proud children
they sow seeds of hate
plant an infecting thought
And watch it with a smirk
i never cursed
I never cared
but my words , my love , my words
You have them
and I warn you
They are Ruthless *******

she was salt
the mariners ally
flew before the mast of every big ship
treading carefully
caressing pennants , the flowing reds and pinks
and sometimes when the skies are blue
and the winds are shifting
carrying the scents of jasmine from a faraway land
that she could never visit ,
She would sit next to the figurehead
viewing the world before ,
the chaos , the love , the dance of disarray , the sad and happy tears
of everyone who ever lived .

She was salt
an escaped soul from the briny bed rocks that clinged to the memories of the deep
she was creation before creation
she was art before art
she was destruction before destruction,
Or so the many fables painted her as ...

And she fell asleep
a sleep so deep ,
neither light nor time reached the depths of the slumber ,
neither music nor poetry pierced the dormant armour ,
A sleep so deep , she forgot how  to breathe , to continue
to remember memories of the past
A rest so profound that creation ceased to exist
until the Night

The Girl was a nuisance
to the townspeople  , to the unsupple ideas that were music to most
She had plain air , unembellished eyes
A salty smell blew everytime she walked across the citadel
"a witch , she could be "
"chanting the unknown"
"preaches the unwanted "
"a curse "
"a wretched sorceress"
The whispers gained favours
found new strength from lands unknown .
"The Girl should Die "
And so it went

One Faithful night
when the air was warm and the moon was bright
Their voices grew strong and their hatred gained might
"The Girl was The Sacrifice
A means to end this Game of mice
Her blood shall Cleanse
Her flesh shall feed
A fated offering to the gods We plead "
the words of the leader rang loud and clear
And the confused soul heeded the Seer
Dressed in White with  Her hair bleeding to the night
The Girl stood , Dried salty tattoos coating her face
Wide eyed and trembling , She stood before the Seas
with the Seer , the sharp knives and the gravel behind her
She walked , hands tied , bloodied
To the seas , Wailing a silent song

THE CRY went pass the waters through time and light
through past and future
through the cries of up and below
Reaching the Deep

Shipwrecks
With empty pages
And a tattered quill
That never ages
Dry Air
Iced pain

As the ticks and ticks of my heart calmed down
Matching the silent lullaby of the brook

Through my ***** I felt a roar
To let loose to monster over

Guard me , oh witches of North South and East and I shall keep your light alight

The sun went down in a pinkish lake
And a strong wind blew my papers to the water

My poems my stories my history and my eulogy
All floated , away
Barefoot I walked
I danced to the Celtic lullabies
I could touch the sky now

Guard me witches of heart mind and body and I shall keep the lamps lit

It's a new beginning
And new beginnings are the souls of hope
A horizon each day with flowers , scent and music .
Guard me , witches of leaves bark and root
And I shall dance to the end
Ever so gracefully across the moor

Should they
Use a knife
And cut out your ego
Penetrate the cold eyes
And paint a pretty pink

Gashes of red will adorn your hands
Markings of trees and labrynthian words

Tattoo an oath of truth on to your temple
For the mirrors and eyes that graze you shamelessly

Amputation ...the quasi weightlessness
Tool of a foolish cleanser
The pear of anguish
And yes the world heard then
Your screams ...so musical that  she danced on top of your unmarked grave

A heart beat
A moment
A second
That's all it takes
A second
Your mind dresses up
In the prettiest clothes
In the darkest hues
And your body follows
Half witted
The trudge is hard ...
A second later
Your body sit still
In a porcelain bathtub
With the sweetest smelling salts
And pink bubbles
Different hues
But your mind is a sad hermit
Thought after thought
Permeates the line between sanity and sadness
The dam breaks
And your hand reaches
For a second
A second of breath
A second of solace
A moment of clarity

Karma may not exist
But Karma lives in our head
Painting pretty pictures
Sweet scented dandelions
And a calm head
A happy body and a beautiful memory

A second
So I enjoy it

Denudated souls
Degrading wood
Floats around
Noone to hold onto
Nothing to grasp at
Hunger to breathe
Greedy for air
I lay
Eyes open
Hair dancing on top of the blue waters
I sleep
Eyes open
And I watch myself sleep
With eyes open
The greens weren't far away
The trees were close by
But my eyes they last saw
The degraded histories
So many living and dead histories
I watched myself slowly sleep
With eyes open

Imbued with lies
Slain by songs
Stabbed by honesty
Conned by love
And still i am see
I can hear
I can sing
I can dance to the tunes of pain
I can watch the embers
Embers of memories
Of the last love i lived

Decades Ago
Years Ago
Days ago
A brief mention of time ago
I lost count
I lost count of my heart breaks
Maybe i forgot to count
I see the flow and i believe it's a mirage
I see the pain , pain is time
Or maybe time is pain

You watched me fade
As you loved her
You watched me melt
As you caressed her
You watched me burn
With memories of Us
As you held her hands so tight

And as I begged for air
You cried to be saved
And drowned me

It was a stupid decision
My idiotic innocence
I yearned to be liked
I Yearned to be loved by you
A love that was hope
That was what the poetry of stars were about
The love that was a journey
Rain storm hail summer and autumn
Spring
The holy spring
Flowers and birds
I yearned for the love
I wish I could travel back and laugh at myself

I knew i was a Loyal Soldier
Fought for you
Your kingdom your dreams
Did you think Twice
Before you executed me
As you watched a lifeless body cling to your ropes
Did you see my loyal scars

I want to hide behind the laugh
In the crests and falls of the chapped sound
I want to traverse through the mind
Silently swagger and order the havoc
Caress the restless heart
The brewing storms

And curl up around
The wild forest of your head

On his knees
Head bent low
Withered lips whispered to the
Shaking earth
Blood seeped out of his heart
To the wet roots

The foliage prepared a eulogy
For the lonely warrior
With bleeding eyes
As he sang the song fo his life to
The roots of the willow
Red and green and red and green

And the wind carried the scent of his
Story
To a heart full of wild lillies
Far way
Amidst the greens and reds

A million stories played in her head
Thousand poems swam in her eyes
It was as if a window opened in her heart
And hundreds of birds flew out
With her hands outstretched
She traced an oath

On the horizon
In green and red
Drizzled in history
A story grew
Silenced by years
Years and years
Of wings flapping
And footsteps flowing ...

There is a tattoo
Of a timid blue catterpillar
Curled around a crescent Moon
Slow strokes done to perfection
Astonishing fingers prayed over it

And one day amidst the
Bronze storm and Foggy dreams
Slowly she could see
Two ice blue wings embracing
The waning Moon

Miles Away
There is
Walking Breathing Dancing
Existing
And the Airs of mountains
Whisper around the sense of wholeness
As a soul calls out for mine
The way mine did last night

I hate that
In the rhythm of your ecstasy
In the rawness of your craving
I became powerless
To ignore the hunger
That your eyes fed mine

I will make an empire in your heart
And every day and every night
When you embrace me
In between your wild and delicate
Nips and kisses
I will croon in to your neck
Breathing the scent of dawn and dusk
I will create an empire in your heart
As your frantic steady fingers
Dance on my body

I close my eyes
To see your tired eyes
And slouched shoulders
The whites Greys and black hairs
Tickle my chest
I will hold you as long
As i can

Every day
You carve a bit more
You clasp a bit more
You grow more
You twine around
My lilies and dandelions

It's cobalt and cerulean
Over the horizon
In an abysmal shadowless cave
Swaddled in thoughts
Of  Dancing in Zion

It's the rusted pain
That'll wither away
Misted by the flame
Of bygone days

It's the erratic
Yet steady beat
Like the music
The trees dance to .

The need to claw into the yesterdays
And hold and breathe .

A faded picture
Of a swing set
On a lonely porch
Of two hands
Twined like vine

A waning sketch
Of imprints of feet in sand

And millions of words
Created in
Moonlight starlight and daylight

Millions of chuckles ,Smirks
Laughs and Hugs

Millions of Kisses
Blushes and Cold shivers

Memories living in skin and lips
I'll run my wrinkled hands over each of them

The scars on his body
They looked like verses
She was tempted
To draw branches
With her lips

Who could blame her
For everyone yearns
For a willow on their body
........................................
Head bent
Eyes shut
Hands on the earth
Cloudless night
We create
A single story

I see you transform
Slowly
Agonisingly slowly
To my warmest colours

Like the final chords of  guitar strings
Melting to the heart

A perpetual rain
Whispering your laughs

And toasting your name to the moon
I can listen to your sigh
Over and over , till i drown
In the deepest pools of time

Chrysanthemums
On yellow topaz tomb stones
Half eaten garlands with grey scents
Sprawled on the viridescent foliage

Silent piteous accolades
And boisterous tears

An ode to a faithful life lived

In the fog
As our breaths
Reach out and couple
With wind we moved
With wind we stayed still
Temptation breaking the silence
The long awakened song
Finds her way amidst the fervour

Eyes and mind , mind and eyes

The willow , she breaks and bends
Hands outstretched to the grey rainbows and melodies
She claws and grasps
Her roots drawing out the gravity
Past the masks and curtains
Past dialogues and mercenaries
She whispers into the night
Bloooms in to the moon
Looking past the outfall
She views her time
Ghosts of memories dancing around her

Amidst the sound of
The sound of metal chains dancing
Of vehicles prancing
Of time gracefully passing
Of the leaves falling
Of hearts Swaying
The light permeating
I heard , she said , your wings fluttering

I hear you , she whispered, amidst the chaos of the world
You have been here longer than me

It took a second
Thrashing of all my fears
Tired eyes wailed for the light

Restlessness
Ruffles of green and tulips and mauve
Chatters
Whispers of giggles and clinks
A forest of emotions

Tuxedos and gowns
And petunias

Wine and whiskey
And half eaten slices

Embossing art

The wind felt like a cold blade
But I refused to cover my face
Scents of fresh bread and sweet rolls
And day old perfumes and evenings

Took effort to catch my breath
I wasn't running I wasn't flying
I was swimming and sinking
In my thoughts , in the history of life
A kaleidoscope of memories
Flew by unaffected
Roping me in

Evening felt different

Everything felt different

Memories of each scent
Living in visions of past

You are magnetic
You are more than enough
You are moon and Sun

You can smile when you cry
You can cry when you smile
You can hug the pillow and count the tears
You can place your palm
Against your heart
And listen to your music

You can eat with your eyes
And speak with your mind
You can frown and run backwards
You can scream
You can be
You can learn and teach
You can count the scars and label them
You can drink water and whiskey
You can play with clouds

You can walk barefoot
You can preach to the trees
You can sell the treasure

You
You are more than enough
You can breathe
Longer and savour it everytime
You
You can smile

You can

She said she was jealous
How do the words
How do they fly out of you
She said I was lucky
Your mind is fruity and sour
Your hands are magic
Her eyes followed my words

She said I was lucky
A mind to love
A mind that cocoons the scars
She followed my words
She listened to my silence

And I
I always danced for my audience
A beautiful mind and a kind heart
A scratchy voice and a silent smile
My spectators

Once upon a time
I drew a circle
My eyes glided over it
Slowly  meandering
Ash on ash grey on grey
The circle became a world
There were spoken words
There was whispered poetry
There was broken art
There was passsion

A circle as transparent as
Sparkling illusions

Once upon a time
When I drew a circle
I saw an entire world awakening
To the sounds and lights

Was i too optimistic
Trusting my Falls and Wounds
Seeing  Mornings everywhere
I can see it all
On a golden screen
With hues of red and green

I was too optimistic
Swallowing every bit of agony
Seeing a rainbow through rainy eyes
I was too optimistic

Now I see
It's never what I see
It's never what I felt
It's always what it is
It's always being
It's just being

You burn brighter
You fall higher

It can be ended in a day
It can be crushed in a minute
It can be submerged
If it didn't have a history
If it didn't have a story
If it didnot bewitch me
in charms of promises and poetry
If I was unable to see
The dimensionless pit of
Words and whispers and lullabies
If I could
It could've been ended in a day

I always imagined
My future
My dreams
My Curses and Peace
My Falls and Wings
My tears both warm and cold
My smiles both cold and warm
My eyerolls and shrugs
My warm coffee and cold teas
I always imagined
Scenes of future and past
A river a rabbit and a tree
A carpet of grass and mewling river
An old yellow shrivelled leaf falling
Sun soaking my mind
I always imagined

There's always peace
In the heart of a storm
In the sky before a hurricane
In the gravel before the parade
In the eyes of a prey ,
In the movement of the predator
In the window sill beneath my elbows
In the heated cartridges
There's always Peace

Not Wrinkles
Not the scars of the past
Not frowns
Not the voice of yesterday
Not the darkness in my mirror
Not the charred grass I stand on
Not the faults ,the dreadful mistakes
Not the persistent ghosts of Failures

Only the lonely ripple
Calmly traversing
The cold river
Accepting the liberty
Embracing the solitude

Craving for the
Final chords of your guitar strings ,
For the loud whispers in the rain
Cold feet and warm hands

Heart secretly wanting the burn
The fire that's set by pain

My Love
Your Kindness is breaking Me
And all I ever wanted was to be Whole

Nights are stories
My granpa used to say
Look for them

Dragons, Fairies ,broken glasses ,
Tears , almond cookies , a single hand reached out , a Cheshire smile
You can see them all in the clouds
Look for them

Nights are stories
Live them when you are alive
Look up and see
My granpa used to say

HE SMIRKED AT HIS REFLECTION
IN THE TROPHIES AND THE CHEERS
                                    SHE SAID you're not the only one
                               SHE SIGHED you're not the first person
                                                         this will pass
      SHE LOOKED IN HIS EYES let it go


HE WEPT INTO HER CARDIGAN
BLURRED VISIONS OF BLACK AND GREY
FAINT MUSK OF DAISIES AND GRASS
                                SHE SAID you're not the only one
                               SHE SIGHED you're not the first person
                                                         this will pass
       SHE LOOKED IN HIS EYES  let it go