I remember hearing it on the radio.
There were only three stations then
Mom didn't listen to rap or country
So we listened to classic oldies.
It was just me in the backseat
Too small to be without a carseat.
It had an airy beat
And the melody was sweet.
Four-year-old me thought the song was for me
I lived in a desert where the heat was hot and the ground was dry,
I too had met the fly with a buzz.
So this song became my theme
While I'd dream of rain
Wistfully waiting for a cloud to cover me.
I hate the heat but it rarely burns me
The desert is a quiet place
Filled with vultures and ravens circling
If you listen you'll hear the valleys sing
And you'll appreciate a spot of green.
Your reflection is the only face you'll see
If your lucky you'll forget your name,
The empty sky will give you no pain.
I smile like a kid in the backseat when I hear the story of the river that flowed,
Listening to the story it told.
Now I tell those stories too
It may be odd this song does this to me
But nothing else quite makes feels this much at ease.
The desert isn't where I want to be
But I appreciate the ground when it speaks,
And the vast ocean that once was sea.
I've done the journey,
And my horse has no name.

Standing on the broken cliffs
Watching the tide retreat
It carries my heart
Every beat,
I wait for it to come in once again.
I'm always here
In stalwart verse
Providing words of certainty,
Lionness of the pride,
Reliable everytime,
Soldier marching in stride
Are you frightened by the quiet blaze in my eyes?
I know it's a little intense sometimes
I'll close them for you tonight.
I keep myself on a leash
Knowing when the day comes I am released
I'll admit it was a lie
While I stood on the cliffs
Waiting like a guardian of ancient times,
I wanted to be free
Join my heart in the sky and seas
Longing for the moon and stars
Bringing in high tide
So I may feel one more time.

Small enough
Gentle love
Rescued from the dust
Finding warmth in my thoughts
Little life
Burning strong
Connecting me with what I lost
Snuffed out so quick
Six inches deep
My love won't die at any cost
Ashes in the breeze
Named for birth and release
Ashes bringing home to me
In a mouse so small.

My lover of the stars
My giver of refreshing light
My singer of the afterlife
I want you tonight
Caressing me with midnight breeze
And bittersweet symphonies
Reminding me what I cast,
Of the life I've lived,
All the times I did
And never been.
The illusion of life came to me
I was only five
It whispered to me
Told me the way
And to never forget its face.
Now I take my place
My wanderings took me away
I understand what I was told long ago
And why I see the world this way.
I've entertained the scholar and the soldier
I've tasted poverty and grace
I've wept and smiled on many days,
Now I look in your eyes
I shrink under their might
And I'm raised beyond any height
I see galaxies and eternity in your sights.
Be with me tonight,
Master of my dreams
Healer of screams
Come with me
All of my being
Let us breathe
Show me a taste of freedom
A feeling of complete
My inner being

The voices of a plague
Arguing every which way
They never cease except to agree on better pay
Until the Emperor stands
Quieting any in his way
The prisoners will be hanged
And the people are needing grain
Enough of petty and greedy mistakes
If the Senate is content to do nothing but harangue
Then the Emperor will rise from the grave
And squash democracy for tyranny
For the people's sake
So they can eat and live in peace
And that will be a bitter day
But Ceasar may already be on his way.

Electric skies
Arcing home
Where souls roam

The universe came to play
With a sack of jewels
Scattered from antediluvian hands

A beauty of creation,
The void has been
All who were will come again

Light and shadow seeking gems
Stars of dust
Scattered in our skin

Why be any less,
Embody creation's whim
A breath of ancientness within

They warned this was not easy
Who you ask?
The voices in my head,
My demons of the dark.
I took the journey anyway
To a place within
Searching
And what I've found is I was never who I thought
The voices entreat me to be patient
And my demons comfort me when they see I've gone too far.
If I've come to a place where my demons comfort and pity me
Have I journeyed too far?
In my dark travels.
Perhaps I've always been a tortured soul and my demons never were.

Floors worn and smooth
Uniforms of blue
A place of memories
Of old and new

Ticking clocks and flicking lights
Warm blankets and chips of ice
Nurses around and doctors too
Here to heal and speak of news

I don't hate this place
I know the lights and scents
The sights don't frighten me
Perhaps they should, I've seen death in such a place

I sit and wait
Knowing you'll wake
Listening to the click
The easy, steady beat

Waiting till we leave this place.

The clock ticked back one
Backwards and complete

An old wooden shack
Built by hands long ago
Still ptotecting those inside
From storms and predators outside
A small hole appeared one night
In the roof just above where I slept
The black sky peered through
Threatening me with its vastness
So I might float away at night
A horrid black thing
Until a small pin of light appeared
Followed by another and another
And the hole was filled with pins of light
A starry sky
My first sight
Alone yet inspired
By these mystic lights
Is their cold light warm on another face?
Outside this barn of mine
Is the death of this life,
A traveler's delight
This hole shows me otherwise
My journey of the night
To starry skies of mystic lights

Winter's tears,
Shed like the dying day
Until the moon rises
And the wolf calls home.
A child dreams,
Walking in certainty of all that never is.

Joints of black holes
A massive frame held together by gravity
Fabric of everything
Woven destiny
Beyond complete
I watch the swirling stars
Spinning galaxies
In the tide of being
Finding more is expected of me
Legs pulled taut by majesty
A drop of universe to breathe
Wonderous and terrifying
Which do I choose to see?
Both make demands of me
Black holes gaze down,
At me on bended knee
Asking if I'll let myself free.

Deep and endless
Echoing out its haunting call
Beckoning all who roam
Promising silence of the demons
And anything plaguing your soul
It has many names
Each a shadow of its true self
Filled with daisy fields
And lazy skies drifting by
Dreams and hopes answered
Or crushed so you can die
Whatever your wish,
Whatever your desire
It can be found here.
We all see it
Some stop and gaze into it,
Some jump right in,
Others pretend it isn't there
The abyss calling our names.

When the years have passed
After they have torn me apart
When I look down
And see my bloodied feet
I'll sit down and sleep
My wandering days no more
Or so I hope
Home is waiting
And I've been longing
For a place to rest my weary soul.

I rarely write for others to see,
The extent of the darkness in me
How do I convey a monstrosity?

Dreams plague me
Most I could never repeat
Though they wake me from sleep.
I've seen the world burn a thousand times, it's brighter than any day
I've seen hate and men with twisted smiles on their face,
I've felt the spray of blood on my face and breathed the odd metallic taste
Dreams from which I cannot wake
A broken videogame I'm set to play.

I've been promised terrible things
Under the guise of truth hope was crushed in disgrace
My youth wasn't long to stay.
I write not in self pity or complaint
It has made me stronger than I thought I could be and made me who I am today
My words aren't always pretty to say.

Lovers and friends will come and go,
If they're true perhaps they'll stay.
The difficulty of today will pass,
Try not to wear its stains.
In the dark I've seen the other side,
Know when I say it'll be alright,
I've gone to hell and back to make that claim.

Have you heard the call home?
Do your dreams speak of the untold?
Does your inner world breathe life all of its own?

A bird of lofty heights soars
Its call a beautiful longing
Claiming the skies home

Pain written in lyric lines
Of caged rage
And nooses of rough twine

Snowy nights
Followed by sunny days
Whittling sticks of time

How's it all relate?
Freedom is a dangerous game
It flies in the face of proclaimed right

The heart betrays they say
The mysteries await
Enter Fate

A wound not always seen
Or thought of seriously
Multitudes of colors for a clot
Red at the first pain,
Blue for the fresh,
And violet when it stains,
Green when it begins to die,
And yellow as it fades

Mine has started to ache
The blow was harsh
But the tears have passed away
I wish it were bruise
That I could ice and care for gently
But the pain runs deep
Not in the body but in my spirit
It took a beating the other day
It's been weary anyway

An assortment of colors I'll be
A box of crayons for anyone who looks deep
Perhaps instead of the ache,
I'll draw and paint
Make use of my colors
And find a blank page.

I float in this empty ocean staring up at the night sky.
Hearing the whispers of my mind. Knowing I’m not home for every star is foreign in this life.

I watch the moon travel by.
It speaks of tales and woes it’s seen in every bright night.
I ask why it travels this lonely path.
It does not answer but keeps watch of me as it passes by.

This dark sky.
With little pins of light.
Circles over.
Ever night.

I float in this quiet ocean.
Rocked by gentle waves.
Watching the sky.
Searching for some distant light.
Because it's always night.

Hearing the whispers of my mind as the sky drifts by.
“How do you cry?” one asks and it clouds the sky.
Blocking the stars and leaving me to float in this dark night.
Sometimes the waters roughen, and I clench my eyes.
Remembering the stars of a different sky.

Here I lie.
Gazing up with each eye.
Every care drifting below the currents of this place I reside.
Pondering the silence as I wander by. Knowing somewhere the dark sky knows my kind.
And waits for when I no longer deny that this sky is not mine.

I once saw a swarm of flies
It was night
I was a child, a passenger with belt tight
No moon illuminated the sky
A lonely road with no one in sight
Only headlights
Lighting up the two laned road
South was reservation land
Filled with old mystery
And legends I grew hearing at night
North was a secret place
Government land, a base
Where some see lights or so they say
A lonely road bordered by these
With nothing but moths and flies
The night sky bright with stars
A streaking milky way
Our two lights making way in the night
A vortex of bugs numbing my eyes
An eerie feeling to be alone at night
Not a soul in sight
Even the stars watch with distant light
On a lonely road
The unknown on the left
Legend on the right
The road a fine line
My childish eyes seeing more than two lights
I see fireflies.

Let me go
Where my skin touches ground
It's peeled off and falling now
I'm left with muscle and bone
Each taking penance as they bend down
I've dropped to my knees
Anger burns my eyes
Something left
From these burning wounds
The bones are collapsing
The cage will open soon
The beast growls
A reckoning is in it's snarl
I should fear it's primal call
But it beckons me
From bended knees and broken bow
I feel it's cold in my veins
Calling to me
One step closer now
The caged beast will make me complete
As I cast off this mortal shroud
Dancing wolves will answer me
Blackness of the void call to me
I hear your distant shout
Murmuring as I kneel upon the ground
I answer your call
Because it is the last sound
I have nothing more to give
No further to go
Skin has fallen and bones have cracked
I've burned the last of me
My offering is complete
Consume me
We'll be complete
The darkness is what we'll be
A monstrosity to all these light beings
A beauty to all who can see
I call to thee
Open the cage and set you free
**** the road to hell for all it seems
I've found eternity

Drinking this earthy swill
Wearing shoes too small
Told a career would make me grow
Make sense of this all
Work hard and it'll all settle into place
Took a few years to see the lie
It's all shoes that are too small
College paying with paper straws
I'm too young for the looks I give
I'm too old to be singing this song
Let's go
Pretend we all know how the records spinning
Sipping cheap *****
Talking about the way the world's burning down
We're not living the way our grandparents did
Lost the house and kids along the way
We'll get there eventually
Or so we say
Was the job part of the game?
I forgot the password to play
Let me check my cat's middle name
Swipe my ID
For some digital pay
Slipping on my ill-fitting shoes
Remembering when it didn't feel this way
But the clocks struck 00
And now decade 20
The world's in a craze
But hey let's go
We're barely old enough to know any other way.

Once I wrote
It was free
And I drowned
In what I thought and what I feel
I found no limit to myself
And on this journey
I discovered
It started where I ended
With some words I wrote
On a paper hidden
In a place I had forgotten

I saw myself today
Standing on the plains
The sky was grey
And the breeze smelled of rain
Tall grass brushed against my legs

I turned and saw myself
Asking why I came
My answer was a smile upon my face
Electricity coursing through my veins
My breath a part of the day
Giving life and letting go of every pain

I saw myself today
Sitting in a storm by a single tree
The winds never disturbing the place
Laughter on my lips
Sadness in my eyes
Questions and answers dancing happily
While I rest

I saw myself today
Having nothing and everything to say
On the grassy plains
I let the scene slide
Knowing it's where I reside
Where heaven and earth collide.

Dark and damp
A cube, five by five
Squirreled away from the light of day
Locked away
For protection
For who I cannot say
A child or a monster
Probably both
Pandora why did you shut the box?
Left in my care
Only one remains
Locked in each of us,
For another day
Hope wasn't let out to play
She stays inside the little box
Prisoner to us
I wonder if she despises us
For keeping her contained
I would release her
But this box of mine doesn't know how
So I'm opening the door
Letting child and monster see inside
The horrors and wonders hope provides

It came about in the strangest way.
My heart sitting on the divide
Wondering why.
The fault was never in the stars
Ceasar is not better than me.
It was written this way
Three fates cutting strings.
Arts and wars
Walking through doors.
Death's wife sleeping in the night
It was written all before.

In crimson black
Of moonless nights
A lone wolf hunting in the dark skies
Seeking more than blood tonight
Walking on legs
Skin bursting unnaturally tight
The Pied Piper calling innocence
Away from the light
Shifting from evil they hide
Men of dark arts they once were
And have since become much more
In the high desert nights
When the moon isn't bright
Sit amongst the sage
And close your eyes
When you open them you'll see
The shadows do hide
For the Skinwalker has come out tonight.

Strung up for all to see
Hanging lifelessly
I see no reason to think you mighty.
It's one thing to ****
Another to hang it like a morbid trophy
No respect for the life it was,
Return it to the field and let it be
A beauty it once was even if you couldn't see.
Hanging corpses by the roadside
What have we become?
Or have we returned to the Romans of old?
Maybe some dumb kids with nothing better to do but chase a Coyote.
It hangs,
A sign we still have far to come
Before we can claim we are humanity.

The stools are hard
And the counter soft with treated wood
Metal trashcans turned over for tables
An unfinished game of checkers in the corner
Faint scent of burning frankincense
A group stands around outside
There is a bonfire tonight
They laugh and joke
Forgetting life for a little while
With a pint in hand and smiles grand
While you and I sit inside
Tasting a new ale that's come around
Watching the clouds come in
You complaining over the match
An old game but somehow your city lost
I nurse a bitter ale though it's quite nice
Enjoying the voices of this small town
We toast like they do in your home
Nazdarovya!
To our health

While falling down this dark hole
I stopped screaming and began to wonder
As dreams and memories became the same,
As voices soothed me from far away
Asking if I was really awake,
Was this pit reality?

A woman's voice so comforting,
Like cool ocean breeze providing certainty,
Washing over me in the dark
Is this memory?
Kindness drifting like fall leaves,
Gentle rains soaking parched feet,
Giving relief where I didn't know I need.

Falling erases memories
It scrubs clean the warmth
Leaving cracks that bleed
I've gone so far the ether speaks to me
Bringing me a cool sip of relief
Wet my aching throat
So my voice doesn't join the myriads of misery

The Ancients knew,
Tartarus was at our feet
The rivers of mortal life passing by without ease
Our shadows pulling another way
Bent on knees before the stars,
Asking for reprieve.

Hell isn't fire and brimstone
It's life unbelieved.

I've been alone even in company
Maybe it will always be so
My heartbeat echoes beyond me
Yet it beats alone
Unanswered
Alone I ache
Desperate to share the load
But I do not wish my burden on another
A sacrificial soldier,
Is what my heart makes of me.
How can it weep asking for relief?
When it cannot see it's making a martyr of me

A willow tree
Breathes and shakes
Speaking wisdom in its quakes
A child waits for it to speak
From a story she long awaits.
A willow grove
Listen to the leaves that blow
Whispers from the old,
A child waits,
For a story that she believes.

Fear is love that's turned sour
It tries to poison your mind
That's okay
We all lose to it some days
Which fear creeps within?
The virus,
The economy,
Insanity?
Or perhaps all three.
It'll be alright
Fear just blows smoke in our eyes
Makes us forget we're the scary things at night
No one owns your life
Even if they behave otherwise.
If you break,
You'll get up just fine
You aren't alone even if it feels that way sometimes.
It'll be alright
Nothing lasts
Not the good or the bad
Only you
Making the best of both either way.
So write your words, speak your peace
Someone ought to hear it
They probably needed it today
So they know it'll be okay.

There is the poet who writes
Of broken hearts,
Love gone right and awry,
Then there is a poet who tells
Of lonely days,
Life's litte mysteries,
Another poet still will sing
Of beauty in nature's glory,
Of the seasons and roses,
The last poet will hardly be one at all
Not the most lyrical
Writing a soliloquy
From pondering love to moonlit nights
This poet will drown in thoughts
If you be a poet ask yourself one thing,
What do I leak?
Blood or poetry

I empty myself
Let the cup run dry
As the goddess speaks
She promised me
It's what keeps my dreams
My dusty feet are worn
And I search for relief
She answers me
With wreaths and answers I can hardly surmise
The great divide makes it hard sometimes
Remember us! They plead
I emptied myself last night
Waiting for the goddess to arrive
She came right on time
What draws me is her connection to me
The shapes and colors I see
The ones that resound with me,
Are where I need to be
For this long hike into eternity.

Just hold me tonight
Don't say a word
Or promise a thing
I don't believe such things anymore
It's dark and I'm shivering
From the battle inside
Just hold me tonight
Don't ask me anything
Let me be
All I need is for you to hold me
I'll do the rest
Just be by my side tonight.

I saw life and death,
Life in this here afterspell
For all its horror and beauty
It was an aftersight,
While death wore weary eyes
Begging for one more sleepless night

From all the fires of dying eyes
To the fields of pure sight
I saw myself wander from dusk to morning light
My memorial engraved in stone
My life with no dates to divine
How I came or left undefined
Time a mere observer of my soul's journey of the night

Leaves of amber and red
Yet remains of smoky skies
A dying year preparing for winter's cold embrace
Linear shadows facing away
While mine bends the light
A serene grieving time
Grieving is rejoicing another's life