Let me go
Where my skin touches ground
It's peeled off and falling now
I'm left with muscle and bone
Each taking penance as they bend down
I've dropped to my knees
Anger burns my eyes
Something left
From these burning wounds
The bones are collapsing
The cage will open soon
The beast growls
A reckoning is in it's snarl
I should fear it's primal call
But it beckons me
From bended knees and broken bow
I feel it's cold in my veins
Calling to me
One step closer now
The caged beast will make me complete
As I cast off this mortal shroud
Dancing wolves will answer me
Blackness of the void call to me
I hear your distant shout
Murmuring as I kneel upon the ground
I answer your call
Because it is the last sound
I have nothing more to give
No further to go
Skin has fallen and bones have cracked
I've burned the last of me
My offering is complete
Consume me
We'll be complete
The darkness is what we'll be
A monstrosity to all these light beings
A beauty to all who can see
I call to thee
Open the cage and set you free
**** the road to hell for all it seems
I've found eternity

Several years ago
Life led me to a fork that went both ways
One was known and everything I had been raised to be
The other was singular and marked with shame
The former was the only one I was supposed to take
A simple lie is all it would take
A sip of kool-aid to dull the pain
But I couldn't kneel before another's game
So I took the latter
Beginning a journey that belonged to me
I lost what childhood had given me,
I watched family and friends turn away
At eighteen that was a bitter thing
Deracinated from everything
It left me grasping to make sense of anything
As a child I had always been told about people like me
I had taken the red pill
The lies went away and I had to rebuild everything
I made home for myself
Not out there
Where the world spins without wait
But inside
Where my shadows dance and play
And I found my way
I still don't know where it leads
Or what I'll be along the way
But I've made peace with the pain that led me this way
And all the friends and family who have gone away,
Because I didn't see life their way
Now this path doesn't seem so lonely and the shame that marked the entrance was a lie to frighten me away.

I think failure must smell like old coffee
The kind that spills on a white dress shirt
Staining yellow as it turns cold
The once rich aroma turning bitter
An acidic stain that eventually dries
You frown and in embarassment try to hide it from those around
With a bitter laugh telling your mates that's what happens when you rush
You go home and try to scrub it out
If you know the tricks no one will ever see the stain
But you'll see the remnants in your eyes
Everytime you put on that white lie
An invisble ring of sickly yellow
Surely it's obvious, everyone will see.

I think failure feels like this sometimes
A stain we'd rather not see
The bitter aftertaste of something once warm and comforting
I wonder if the stains we hide,
Ever become beautiful?
A momento we once tried
And yeah got burned a few times
Maybe we should stop wearing white
Pretending the facade is true to life
Using magic markers to live up to a lie
Life is messy and anyone who says otherwise
Probably has more stains than you or I.

May my blood of this moon
Fall upon the stones
Creating life tonight
May the earth hear my cries
In the heat of night
I'll hand back with warriors might
Every grain and stars alight
Heal these wounds
Mother of the land and sky
Incantations of spirits on my side
May this blood flow bright
Down the stones to river beds and watery depths of absent light
Sky grant me one more breath tonight
I'll whisper my creation into life.

I saw the sun today
It asked me to stay
I said no thanks
I saw the moon today
It asked if I'd visit tonight
I said alright
I sat and watched my skin smoke
Silver wisps stretching up like snakes
Vapors of my breath turning cold
Gems have taken my eyes
And my heart gave way to stone
Burned away inside
I found what was left
A soul of gems and stones
Lit all on their own

The creek babbles just outside
Aspen leaves blow gently in the moonlight
Mice scurry for the snacks they think we've left behind
Despite the chill I'm warm tonight
You lay beside,
Breathing softly, asleep
It is the last night
Your arms wrap me tight
It's been a long time
But my empty feel persists
Knowing my thoughts betray what's inside,
Once again our ships are passing in the night
My thoughts scream
It wasn't meant to be
I ignore them for a taste of life
Just tonight
I know I'm free
A blend of pain and peace
Will it always be?
Let me sleep
Falling with nothing but the creek and trees
I hope they catch me before the scream is released.