I've said all this before
I can't breathe
I'm shaking
I'm terrified
But I lied
It's all for the drama, drama, drama
This is real
This is no lie
I'm actually scared for my life

I stare at the bro-k-k             earring on my desk
                                      e
                                            n
                         g
                    n
                      i
                r                                          
                e
           d
Consi  my last Pokemon battle
There's a NOISE outside
Thunder or trash can?
A beep, beep, beeping in the kitchen
Inane and e t  e   r    n     a      l
Cinnamon w           f             s  
                         a            t
Through the      w a y ,
                         h           s
                         c           w
                         r            e
                                       e
                         a            t
As *sugar

Don't tell me there are plenty of fish in the sea
When the silvery, slimy things hang from coral reefs
And are stuck in frayed netting
Not yet frayed to the point of breaking
When they drown in oil and choke on garbage
Scaly flesh peirced by razor blade teeth
Captured and smothered
And beaten and gutted
Frozen and thawed and chopped
Stewed and grilled and covered in salt and sauce
Tossed and sliced and torn and diced
Delivered to my table in a trice
Don't tell me that there are plenty of fish in the sea
Because one of those fish could be me

Feeling
Alone

Because I know

You won't see it


Until it's too late.

Face                     of MADNESS        , gather your twisted strength
Stench like sadness? (Do)n't                             confuse, its greatness
Sway through the fractures and disjointedness
      Disembodied                      manifestati­on, useless phenomenon
S(cul)p(ture)s hammered into DisFuRme/nt
Castrate salient pieces                     of that body
      Spew inhuman lexicon insinuating         i-n/co\here/nce
Slaughter the (harm)ony                   within cadence
Screech!         H     o      w      l!          Growl!
Rel(easing) murderous miseries within infected entr[ails]
      R A G E, count{less} bullets                              turning fl{ashes} of sanity to CAD(AVE)R(S)
De[generate] ripping throat of conscio(us)ness

Walking in screens

Continually posing

Posing in a play

Entertaining the haze

Suspended in the maze

Of purgatory

One door

Both ways

Fate

Chance

Altered states

Hate

Commands

From a beast

That states

His plans

Cans the cants

Demands a stance

Will not stand

Astray

Today

Do not

Count

The sand

Or risk

Sealing

Fate

My home is not a product
My room is not for sale
My stove is not a bakery
Nor my yard a barbecue
My country is invaded
These strangers in a strange land
Their horses stomp their hooves
As if they own the stables
Their prostitutes stomp
Their heels and ****
In the bed I make each morning
I continue ghosting on the porch
The sun is not my friend
Nor my enemy
He is a battle over my home

i slipped inside an atom to see what i was made of,
and i saw you there too.
hanging out with molecules,
we created as we went.
our dna collided,
neutralizing all that was,
evolving into something else.
we realized it was still us, and that
change was the essence of our creativity.
We stopped holding on,
and flew freely through every dimension.
and when we were done,
i went inside.

Sleeplessness
Brought to you by sparkling espresso in a can
I have underestimated you yet again, oh humble coffee bean
But back to work
Eight tabs open, going back and forth
It's nothing short of a miracle if any given task is given more than a minute of attention at a time
Muscle spasms, trembling, fascinating
Overwhelming urge to mindlessly flex the muscles I don't have
Fake machissimo brought about by exhauation?
Or the exhileration of having to complete 8 projects in a day
While simultaneously trying to grasp a breaking down of my mind which hasn't happened since...forever
Hmm
These are the prime conditions to breed a taxing marathon of productivity
Or a chain of costly impulsive decisions to perpetuate procrastination.
Signs that someone is going crazy range from ****** to inability to stick to a single topic to excessive use of run on sentences
"How meta, acknowledging your insanity deconstructs the very notion of it if you normalize it within yourself and just look as everyone else as crazy! Ha.ha."
That made no sense, i don't think.
I like using big words to make myself sound smart you can make anyone believe anything if you use big words also it scares those
Hippopotomonstroesquipedaliophobixlcs
Grumble grumble
Good night/morning/whatever