My soul is trapped.
My ghost is lurking, floating like a lost cause.
A curse only I know, a curse that destroys every minute of my waking life.
I have yet nothing more to do, to become, to complete.
I am cold, shattered glass withered into the dark abyss where the lonely serpent sleeps.
Eternity has no name for the darkest of times I recall as to what I have lived.
Living an immortal life, I want to be gone.
I want nothing in a human form.
The night sky energizes me.
I gaze upon and dance crudely.
The airy breeze in the dark wind.
Like the spirits wavering around floating with me.
I see nothing but the darkness it all brings.
As black as night, as black as death.
She works in the shadows, haunts you as you do her.
Sees you and watches you.
If you onto her, she's way onto you.
Her presence of hopeless sad cries.
A lonely star, of death and cold air
A black heart, wild and can't be tamed.
She's screams, in silence.
Nightmares lurking beneath.
You see me, but I don't see me.
I don't know me.
An energy of dark forces, working with the ones who bring agony to life.
Frozen inside, without a trace, without a fortude of light.
I have become my worst nightmare.
The goddess of death.
Paint it black, as black as the night, as black as death.

Lost
Lonely
Angry
Bored
Depressed
Not myself
Deprecated
Longing for love
Caved in
Scared
Exhausted
Frustrated
Anxious
Paranoid
Confused

I wish I had someone.
I wish I had you.
I wish I had love.
I wish I had someone who embraced and understood my darkness.
I wish I had someone who saw through it.
I wish I had someone who really cared.
I wish I had someone who wanted to be there.
I wish I had a soul who connects with me spiritually and wants me for more than what I seem.
I wish I had fire in the wind.
I wish I had a voice to speak to.
I wish I had a face that guided me.
I wish I had that person that uplifted me.
I wish I was happy.
I wish I was not alone.
I wish I had my partner in crime.
I wish I had my ride, and my die.
I wish I had you.
This is way over due.

I am covered, hidden and locked away.
Exposed but not exposed.
Secretive, but open and saying too much.
Alone, misery seems to love my company.
Projecting hatred on those I stay distant from.
Not trusting, not needing to, because the motives and character screams louder than the physical disposition of who they seem to display.
I see the cracks beneath, yet, I have no remorse.
I have become so angry and miserable, that those I hate beckon to cause destructive anxiety when I hear them speak because they all seem to talk about me, and only me.
Like I am the main topic of the town.
These jealous petty cowards, soulless peasants, are nothing to me.
Yet their voices, their presence, angers the pits of my hell.
I am a dark presence, unknown.
A mysterious force, an energy I cannot recall.
She takes over me.
She now has full control.
The girl I once hated in the mirror, is now me.
She is my own reflection of darkness.
Lost and lonely...
My own reign of the throne I harness

You got a fire inside, but your hearts so cold.
I tried to wash you away, but you just won't leave.
I know you're gonna keep on haunting...
Until I leave, until you can't have me.
Until I become spineless, and immoral, like you.
Maybe I subconsciously called upon you.
Maybe my desperate cries for help brought upon you.
Something I can't seem to let go of.
What is my emptiness without you.
What am I without you?
What am I ever to become!!!??
****** eating in the rummaging chaos of this reckless mind.
Do not come near...
Or maybe I do...
But my darkness, my loneliness, it called you.
I do not know what you are, and how you are helping me in any way.
But I feel you, and feel your presence.
Your dark truth eating away at my lies.
No one else can hear me, everyone else fears me.
Maybe I am possessed by you.
Maybe I am nothing without your deadly being.
Maybe I am you, and you are me.
You followed me for a reason.
I begging you, to keep haunting.
They cried out, "please stop, you're scaring me''
I can't help this toxic energy.
**** right, you should be scared...
Who is in control?

Senses filling up inside of me.
Sensations of bruised mortality.
Jittery explosions.
***** thoughts eating at my brain.
Do I say what is not to be explained.
A shadow overcast, I dare not to speak.
As I see your eyes, your stare, stalking me.
Watching my every motive.
My mind is dared not to be reached.
Darkness, and light, endowered as I reach beyond what I think I could explore, but cannot.
Can I be touched and felt, heard.
For once.
This brick wall, made of stainless steel and cold iron...
But a bleeding heart ripped apart perceiving a dark shadow of a lonely part.
A part of the within, the sorrow.
As she cries, whimpers, drowning in deprecation.
Wounded, still standing with cracks and scars.
Covered in red, of strength and courage.
Awaiting another day in her battlefield of conviction, disruption, and voiceless whispers.
Touch my thighs, lurk within.
Conflicted emotions and wars fighting to begin.
Where is the end?
Where is the peace?
Where is the silk curtain of velour chairs and a room of candle lights and dim...
Where is the light?
I have seen to be astounded.
Pounding every ****** day in the doors in my unrested mind.
The warrior, I lose, then I win.
Yet, I am not to be seen.
Hated for all that I am.
Not to expose what I am fighting for.
My secrets; dark, deadly, and too terrifying to even ****** swim.
Yet, they know me, or they think they do.
They know of what I am showing, not of why I am dying.
Bleeding nostrils, the clocks strikes it's time.
May I only cry to myself.
Not be seen.
Starving, she's unhinged.

I stand as alone, as eternal to what life seems to be.
To be it not.
For I am no longer me