The pain i feel is overwhelming.
Ludacris amount of partials parting away from me slowly
Like an art piece delicately painted
Every detail presented flowing into the sky yet tainted
Shattered crown that im bound to in this sacred temple
Made out of water and clay to sing
A voice thats unheard-of which is circling
Spirals of memories thats forbidden to b discussed bc im accused of it being a bunch of fuss
Wanting the light at the end of the tunnel to be brighter bc im sick an tired of being a fighter.
Wanting better bc I deserve it like anyone else
Yet they place me back on the shelf with the other broken frames
That has no names considering, the artist is the master and we are their game.
Love is suppose to have no limits
If thats the case then why am I sitting here with tears, throwing massive fits? Dreaming and wishing for it to one day stop.  Live the life to where I dont need to hop.
Over all the holes that run deep into the ground. So I dont fall an at the bottom be found. Curled up an thrown away like trash. Im suppose to be valuable, a priceless stash.
A masterpiece who brings positive energy.
The masters hand was shaking when he created me. So my flaws are focused on an that determined my fate. To them? Im just bait.The buyers have expectations of perfection. I didnt sign up for this application. I have many qualifications that are overlooked. But so what? Im just a flawed art piece made for the books.

On this Track

Further up along the track than you
Got on the same train, too
But I’m much further up the track
Perhaps it’s intelligence you lack
Perhaps it’s wisdom you lack
Whatever it is I’m further up ahead
I’m well said
Well read
And well bred
I’ve lead
I’ve also pulled a big sled
I know a few things or two
I knew it way before you
I know what to do
How bout you?
I know where and when
I’m done before you begin
When your on chapter one
I’m done with three
I get bored easily
I’m impatient
I’m a dissertation
I do more than enough
More than necessary
More than you and a bit more
I have a need to do more and more
I don’t know quit
I hate IT
Got me a big brain on this train
It’s good to be me
I’m a busy bee
But with this big brain
It don’t stop the rain
It don’t stop the pain
It didn’t help you remain
Always quick to figure
Pull my trigger
Always building bigger
But bigger don’t mean better
And sometimes better
Don’t get a dear John letter
This illusive battle between heart and thought
That everyone’s got
The love in heart
The think in thought
This war is fought
I’m further up the track than you
But you have more love than I do
For now I’ll enjoy the train
Choosing wisely not to complain

I was kind

I am bright, lost a light
I am a night...
An unread soul behind the scene
A nervous head, couldn’t go to bed
Walking all the night, but!
For away can see a sight
Maybe a sun and a kite
You didn’t find,
Yesterday, I was kind.

Thoughts please!
Regards,

Patrick Ramsey

Black balloons carried you away.
I can not go, can not see, can not feel,
can not know.
        
I watched you fade; distant, drifting, further and further until out of sight.  
I can not see.
      
Oh to bring you back, to hold you, to feel your strong hands behind my back just one more time.  
      
But they carried you away, drifting, dark and distant and you are gone.

I watched you fade; distant, drifting, out of sight.   What was of you was lost in the distance.     Far, so far, oh so far!   I can’t see you.    I can’t hear you.    You can’t see me.   You can’t hear me.  
      
If I could bring you back, hold you, feel your strong arms and hands wrapped around  my back, and feel your generous loving heart.   The heart that you shielded away, lest it be seen as weak.

But black balloons carried you away, drifting, dark and distant, you are gone.      I can not touch you.   I can not see you.    I can not hold you.

I hold your absent presence.

Upon this vibrant world
Man walks mundanely,
As if fragrance furled
Their hearts insanely.

Amid carnival and chaos
We sail the seas,
We eat those candyfloss
Emerging from trees.

We laugh and cry
Throughout our life,
We fall and try
Through joy and strife.

Through this temporal
We seek the eternal,
Free reefs and coral
Yet we loath the carnal.

Beast's and men
Live side by side,
Shouldn't we then
Find peace within stride?

In this tantrum tavern
We live with hope,
We give and earn
Holding the rope of cope.

Heaven on earth
Is not a mere illusion,
If you anchor Love's perth
Soil becomes cushion.

Everything hurts

My heart can’t take it - I can feel it burst
I’m struck by lightning
and everything’s dark
I’m stuck and I’m lost and I’m drowning
I’m hand tied at the bottom and I can’t get up
The sound of people around me is making my heart erupt
I said I’m stuck
And I’m saying it hurts
So when people talks I just wish they would shut up
I’ve shut down
There’s nothing left of me

The life that I’m living is no longer mine
I’ve given my all for too many times
Instead of feeling good I wanna commit a crime
Or maybe it’s not a crime if it’s your own soul you want to end?
Maybe I’ll be pardoned as there’s nothing left to mend
I’ve bent over backwards, I’m all twisted out
Not even my own voice can help me to shout

I’m drained and I’m empty

This life is not mine

Phoebe says it best

”Not mine, not mine, not mine
And even if I was happy, okay and skipping, I’d hear
Not not mine, not not mine, not not mine”

This life that I’m living is no longer mine

Trade the quiet for just one word, why afraid to allow the voice to be heard.
   Never to know what I truly did wrong, as music notes file depressing songs.
  Tears are shed for  hurt and shame, of no answers given just stillness  to pain.
  Apologize  oh how I tried, spending so many  nights wondering why.
    Was the word Love the straw that broke the trust, of being my friend  but now  disgust.
   Quietness has been the answer received, a wall of emptiness left feeling bereaved .
   To love another is not to fear, it’s universal in life and okay to share.
   Absence conversation only wanting to belong, the tiniest spot for me I fake the strong.
   Silence is punishment I plead not need,  forgive to forever I will concede.

The moon's eyes upon me
As I travel this road, never ending
Thoughts of never belonging
My empty soul now depending
On hollowness
I'll swallow this
Pride if not for ignorance
Take for granted bliss
But savor the taste of a painful kiss
Upon the grave of the one I miss
Still I must prevail against the odds in which I find myself
On a long twisted road, deep in thought, deep in hell
Will I find myself petrified?
Or am I doomed to be stricken?
Am i just lost?
Or fatally sickened?
Am I truly free?
Or am I imprisoned?
Question after question!
The plot truly thickens!

Oh how far I've come, such a long way
Far from rock bottom amongst decay
Risen like the sun does for a new day
Bright and free from the games they play
Called me a longshot, called me a risk
Left me in the dirt to sore in ****
But I'm from hellfire, so I lit
Lit ablaze, from the pit I lift

Oh yes I'm back, oh yes I'm here
Give me all you got, and I'll give you fear
Oh yes I'm back, I'm here to stay
Who's next to try to get in my way?

The road from hell, it was made of pain
But I gained strength from the endless strain
Surely anyone else would have gone insane
But I have the iron will to sustain
Forget my past, and heed what comes
And never forget this when it's done
It doesn't matter where the hell you run
I will always be the shadow that you fear my son

Oh yes I'm back, oh yes I'm here
Give me all you got, and I'll give you fear
Oh yes I'm back, I'm here to stay
Who's next to try to get in my way?

Hello suicide!
Its been awhile
Remember me?
Yer ol' buddy patrick
I need your assistance
To escape from this trial
Forgive me friend
If I'm unable to smile

Ah, yes! Patrick, of course!
Forgive me bud
If my voice does sound hoarse

I've been hanging around
Don't you see?
I'm glad you've swung by
To console in me
For my first recommendation
Is hanging
Yes, in fact
This is my plea
Might I suggest a rafter
Or perhaps a nice tree?
This ones on the house
Yeah, this one is free

Ah, yes! A hanging
Indeed!
But if I were to do that
A rope I would need
Not only that
But I could be rescued
And freed
Do you have another?
Please forgive me suicide
Forgive me for my greed
What else can I do?
Please consider my plead!

Ah, yes! I can do one more
But I'm growing tired and weak
And my neck is still sore

Take a handful of pills
And overdose
This I know you've tried
And you came really close
But you can't be easily rescued
And you don't need a rope
Do it! Destroy your dreams!
And trample your hopes!

Excellent! This one sounds great
For sure!
I do have a decease
And pills might be the cure
But what if I live
What if my body endures?
But this option has potential
And it has great allure
I'll consider this option
To you, I ensure

Well, well, well!
Look what we have here!
Looks like I'm successful
As if a death is near
Theree no need to panic
Theres no need to fear
However, I do need payment
So start paying in tears!
Now RIP my good friend
Its been fun mate, cheers!

I don't know how this should begin
But I keep thinking about this huge mess that I'm in
At one point my life was all based around a sin
In a time where I would go and invite my demons in
Wasn't too far gone, but then the drugs came
Everything went wrong, and I was not the same
Ticking time bomb, i was going too insane
Visions too long, and only me to blame
Didn't trust my friends, thought they'd **** me in the end
Tried so hard to justify, but it all was just pretend
Tried to end my life, like it was just another trend
So afraid of being attacked but I had no need to defend

Hoping on a thought
Bringing my thoughts into real
And with a little dedication
Just hoping you'll see how I feel

Honestly there's nothing to do
My thoughts are always on you
The perfect one to my two
Knowing this is strange but oddly nothing new

Going bonkers at the thought
Though it's the absolute truth
From earth to the furthest star
I'd build a ship to get to you

I'm not very handy though
So I'll just watch my collecting coin pig
Maybe get a nice little loan
And do a little jig

But everything's falling in place
Seems things happen as they should
Or just lucky coincidence
So I'll just keep knocking on wood

I always try to see the true spirit
And though I look past appearance
Your beauty writes all my lyrics
This love I feel, you have to hear it

Because
I shake.. When I'm without you
Baby I break.. Hope that I'm found soon
Pray that I wake.. For you I'm proud to
If the sun rays.. Are too much I'll shroud you
Keep you in my shade
While sun rays make me bake

Baby if you promise only
Just to not break and disown me
I'll be down forever
Keep you from being lonely
I don't have many answers..
Questions lately feel like cancer..
I'm not really one for banter..
But for you I'll raise my standards

Because
I shake.. When I'm without you
Baby I break.. Hope that I'm found soon
Pray that I wake.. For you I'm proud to
If the sun rays.. Are too much I'll shroud you
Keep you in my shade
While sun rays make me bake

I've been... On the run
From myself.. Ive come undone
Too ashamed.. To see the sun
Heartbreak.. Doomed to love no one
Then you came.. I think you're the one
I'll take.. The whole world for you ***
Stay with me.. And we can have some fun
Watch the world bake.. From the smoke on our guns

Because
I shake.. When I'm without you
Baby I break.. Hope that I'm found soon
Pray that I wake.. For you I'm proud to
If the sun rays.. Are too much I'll shroud you
Keep you in my shade
While sun rays make me bake

I'm standing on the edge of the cliff
Looking intently at the deep blue sea
A gentle breeze bristling on my arms
Waves crashing on the rocks beneath.

I can feel the fear building up inside me
Sending shivers running down my spine
Storm after storm after another storm
The endless struggles draining my soul.

Plans are not going as I have expected
Everything is completely ruined, wrecked
Though surrounded by hundreds of people
But nobody I can call my own, my home.

I'm sitting on the edge of the cliff
I close my eyes, visualize the what-ifs
Should I jump and take a free fall?
Or stand back and regret my decision?

The moment you reach rock bottom
Body is rejuvenated with a sudden jolt
Limits push strength to the utmost
A new version of you is waiting to unfold.

I am from screens and bright machines
that show whole new worlds
that I use to pretend I’m
not living in this one.

I am made of the sharp smell
of artificial apples and cinnamon
burning your throat as you breathe it in
like secondhand smoke.

I am made of lonely days
spent on my phone
pretending to laugh when people say or send something
because I know they need the ego boost.

I am made of late nights
when I shut my phone off
and I start to cry
because I know that no one thinks about me after I go.

I am made of hours spent huddled
as my brother spits vitriol at my parents
and they take it with willing ears and become submissive dogs
with tails between their legs.

I am made of hellfire
carefully bottled up
until someone pushes me to the edge
and I am ready to **.

I am of thousands of cups of black coffee
sobbed over at three am
alone in my kitchen
hands searing, but refusing to let go.

I am from carefully counting every dollar
wondering when
I am allowed
to leave this town.

I am from four am walks
alone through the town
taking in the sights
and praying the sun will rise.

There’s a shattered hand mirror in my room.
Broken glass litters the cold dark marble
and teardrops drip all over the shards,
because even in all of these things that I am,

I am still not good enough for myself.

My head's against this white wall that is no longer white
It's been dirtied and stained, just like my own ****** life
And on it I see the cracks
Of the trauma from the past
Wonder if the ones who did it would have the nerve to say
Why they even tried, these scars can never fade away
If you've been listening and have any sense at all
You could probably tell that I'm not talking 'bout the wall
But I'll just let it all play out and watch the whole thing fall
I'm sick of living like this, I'm sick of being forced to crawl

Oh, my bittersweet conscience
If you are truly in there
In this rattled, mess of a heart
Do not say a word
Just look to the dead, they know the way

Misery- that ******* screams
Louder than the trifling grievance that provoked him
Just as suspected, my dear conscience
Do not listen to a sound
Hold your ear to the dead, their voice is wisdom

I know you make these decisions
Bewildered at their insignificance
Don’t be misguided, my love
Every thought feeds this masterpiece
Remember the dead, and their evergreen contributions

There will be times when good hearts in great numbers
Must crouch together beneath the wreckage
Left in the wake of an evil deed
Do not cling to such a disadvantage, embrace this education
Remember to breathe for the dead for it is the wind of change

There is nothing to gain from ignorance
Trust intuition, for she is the mother of the living
And though she walks with a crutch
Remember dear conscience, she walks towards humanity
Away from the dead, they have been raised and grown

This cage that loyalty builds
Without doors or windows- only a paper-thin façade, my friend
Pass through easy with mercy
It will fall by the way, do not fear it
Now, it belongs to the dead, they know where it goes

When a traveler comes to you, thirsty
Give them no mirage, my heart of the heart
Drench their soul and send them toward love’s Oasis
This is my only command, dearest YOU
But do not tell the dead, they take no more orders.

Talk depression
But you're no exception
Feel the attention
Which sparks your aggression
Hating when all their eyes are on you
Brought to light everything that you do
Feeling like you can't hide out of view
The more that you fight it, the more that you lose
Slipping further, don't know who to blame
It's yourself but now you're too ashamed
To admit it, so you turn away
Just a pawn who's still stuck in the game
You really don't know how to quit
On the trigger, your finger just slipped
You felt it fade fast when the bullet hit
Cut short, the lifeline got clipped

Memories of childhood days,
Where outside the children played.
When fathers worked and mum’s stayed home,
No latch key kids, or home alone.
We didn’t have a lot to eat,
School dinners were a welcome treat.
Cake and custard was the best,
wanting more like all the rest.
Tuesday was family allowance day,
butter roll then out to play,
Playing rounders with our mates,
Not going home until very late.
If you got bullied by another,
You didn’t dare go tell your mother.
For she would give your ear a slap,
Tell you go and hit them back.

Imagination was a wondrous thing,
boys made carts with wood and string.
Old pram wheels were the best,
race down hill was the test.
Battered and bruised we didn’t care,
two or three would often share.
Mum would shout, our trousers torn,
Patched up knees and bums all worn.

Blankets we had on our beds,
frozen fingers put between our legs.
Curled up in a ball shivering and cold,
dads old coat was like pure gold.
Wake up in the morning with nose of blue,
Jack Frost had painted the windows to.
We didn’t care what we would wear,
or even think to brush our hair.
Our parents didn’t have a lot,
no need had we the door to lock.
Neighbours helped out one another,
Children would respect their mother.
Memories of childhood years,
as clear today as yesteryears.

I was walking through a narrow mud path
Out in the middle of the haunted woods
When I heard some clear crisp sounds
Like footsteps crushing tilted leaves.

Sharp-eyed, I looked around me
Expecting to find someone near me
"Who's there?" I shouted in the air
But when I turned around, I found none.

The rain has been consistent for weeks
It made the air quite damp and chilly
I tried to skip over muddy puddles
Some I succeeded, others got me wet.

The trail in the woods was long and dark
Sometimes the sun would sneak in
Shone some light on my rugged path
Finally I reached a dark, spooky tunnel.

I could hear heart's dribbling drumbeat
Both my knees were shaking wobbly
I was already thinking of turning my back
I heaved audible gasps to calm nerves.

With a reliable flashlight in my hand
I started walking through the dark aisle.
Never give up at your lowest point in life
Soon you'll see the light at the end of the tunnel.

Compassionate Ocean

Waving waters saying “hello”
“You my dear friend, come to me”
I move towards him, attracted to his aqua voice
This ocean swells with pride
As I step forward, he spins around me
The comfort he brings cannot be overstated
I worry the waves will swallow me, but the ocean, now my friend, reminds me, “you are safe”

I've never really known what's real
Go along with whatever I feel
Won't leave me needing to heal

Some times its hard to hide
What's burning inside
To this I'm forever tied

I never sold my soul
But still lost control
Now I hide away in this hole

Is this a path I pave
Or a shallow grave
There's nothing left to save

These dead hands
Make demands
That go against hopeful plans

It's too late
To change this fate
I'll wither amongst the fear and hate

Think you know a wise man,
a holy man,
a visionary when you see him?
Think you have expectations as to his outward appearance?
His demeanor?
My friend, think again.

He could be any shape he could be any size,
He could have any color from normal to polka dots,

He could be a woman could be a child
Could be from the meekest to the most wild
His wisdom could cover all you wish to know
Or it could just cover which path to or not to go

My friend,
think again
She could be an old lady carrying a blood red apple
She could be all dolled up in glass slippers and such
She could be pale white with lust driven red lips
She could be you
He could be a sweet baby
Or an ugly
***.

Truth takes on many faces it can lead you on a merry dance
Trust only to word and deed,
be deceived not by appearance

Think you know a no-gooder when you see one?
Think you know the beggar on the street is nothing more?
Think again....
it could be your future,
your fate
He could have been in shoes
like yours not long ago







Think you know an angel when you see one?
Think they always wear a halo and fly with wings of gold?
Think again...
they're everywhere,
They could be the neighbor you dislike...


They could stop being human,
and you...
could stop thinking
and leave it up to them

Give the wise holy visionary back their shoes

think again...
meer appearance
may not be as clear
as what was first thought

Open your hear to what's around you
instead of placing things in your pigeon holes,
truth takes on many forms,
One only has to open their hearts
and except things.

So no matter what you see
find that open spirit
where a heart
touches beyond an imagination
within a glimmer.

You cannot dismantle
Our impossible Robot
You do not understand
what holds it together.
What makes a man sing to the world.

You cannot break this
it grows from the broken
spreading faster
than a virus
into the souls
of an infinite family

You cannot unplug this
it runs on a power
you do not possess.
Your quantum
cannot fathom
This primitive code
Cannot undo the flesh
of human electricity

You cannot sever
this connection
These bonds were formed
before you were made.
From the grounds beating heart
and the crashing waves
In the dreams
of earths first children

This is Home
This is where we return to
Where the one
becomes many
blind to the trickery
you conjure
babbling in our thousand tongues
firewalled by a freedom
beyond you .

This is our magic
qualified to heal
To arm, to possess
We are legion
We are night
We are the rain
beyond your forecast
and the spell in our sounds
survives

You cannot silence
Imagination.
Cannot blackout a voice
Everything speaks
Everything moves
and as long as birds
swoop and sing together
We will come
One.

Dear addicion

By Patrick ramsey

I'm writing this to you,
Telling you we're through.
I can't take you anymore,
Don't know what I liked you for.
All you did was wear me out.
Now I know what you're all about.

You came to me with promise and joy,
Now look at all the things you destroy.
Families, lives, bank accounts, you see.
You ruined it all with one little tease.
Look at the way you make me feel
Then you take it all and want me to steal.

Why can't you just go and hide
Somewhere far away where I'll never find?
Everyone at home doesn't understand
How you rip me apart then lend me a hand.
I keep coming back thinking inside
Maybe this time I'll make you my bride.

Then I sit and wonder why,
Why do you really want me to die?
Thousands and thousands come to you
Hoping and praying you'll help them through.
Then they fall for your lending hand,
Only to realize you're nothing but a scam.

You promised me heaven and sent me to hell.
You ruined my life and then wished me well.
Watch me now as I go on my way.
I'm washing myself of all your pain.
So you and your power can just leave me be.
I'm taking my life and setting it free.

" When the days had grown shortest, and the leaves all died.
When life became scarce and all was covered in ice
There lived a pack of wolves against every odd
That grew hungry and tired and needed to hunt

They'd sneak in to the towns in the dead of the night
And seek fire for comfort and warmth in the light
And though they weren't evil, and knew it was wrong
They couldn't escape, the lust for the blood."

"I drown...
For too long I felt the winter's breath
The rain keeps falling down into my soul
Thorns cover my grave... they hurt within me
I wonder how death shall ever set me free
When I cannot close my eyes
I wonder how death shall ever set me free
When there's even in this darkness no place for us to be
Wish I could **** myself again
The spectral lights would fade away
And I...
A thousand voices in my mind
A thousand empty faces starring at me
A thousand lies I can't forget
And one single life I do regret
The only thing left of me... an aura cold and blue
As the banshees embrace me with a sigh
I am gone...
The autumn's song is guiding me
With the sound of the weeping rain I fall asleep
And the thorns, that cover my grave? They hurt no more"

Recognize the bad, but focus on the good.

I made the decision long ago to live.
To see past the inky blackness that coated my heart like dried candle wax clinging to my finger.
The crust of agony lingered through every cut on my pale skin.
I wondered myself why I did it.
Why I cut again, and again.

There were battles that I won,
But the war had just begun.
I couldn’t hide underneath the sun
When my hand was reaching out for the gun I wished was there,
But it wasn’t.
Of course Fate wouldn’t play fair.
I didn’t care, when everyone else never gave up on me.
I was *****, and wanted to bathe in misery.

I wanted to be held, and given razor blade kisses.
Wanting a magic lamp to grant my death wishes.
I had no desire to live anymore
When I felt I had nothing to live for.
I knocked on heaven’s door only to walk away when it was opened.
They brought me back, and I had awoken with a bottle of Jack, and a handful of pills.
Lacing them together until I felt still.

I never knew what I’d be giving up by throwing the battle that I fought so long.
Now I see that living has given me the skills to express my thoughts.
Hope can’t be bought.
You have to look for the silver lining, before you consider dying.
I know honesty hurts, and believe me, I know what pain is.
I memorized the definition when I was just a little kid.

For all the times I wanted to die,
Or went to sleep dreaming of knives,
Never wanting to open my eyes ever again.
Writing the letters saying fair well.
Wish me luck on my journey to hell.
I’d burn, and enjoy the hurt,
Because I deserved the pain.
On my headstone tell one last tale.
Of how an angel fell, when he was promised the world.
Never waking up from one last dream.
With the image of a silver gleam running through his mind
As the blood made a line on his wrist,

But over time I rose against the pain.
I know there are those reading this that have felt the same.
Like they’re walking through a frozen desert, forgetting their name.
Playing the game of life, and losing.
Forgetting their path is that of their choosing.
Lift up your head.
You heard what I said.
Meet my eyes, honest, and true.
The world wouldn’t be the same if we lost you.

Oh death you are ,are not an end
You are another beginning
Of a journey unknown to me
May be ,it would be the same
As I have gone through in this
Your just opposite
light versus dark
May be ,you end this as you say
To take me to another level
Where I find it's not new
I am again in the same
Rigmarole
In the grinding life of dead,Death life you show no difference from life of life
Pain or peace will exist wether dead or alive
Swap

If we think death is an end
to me,i don't see
But a walk over to new beginning
Wether in body or otherwise
Nothing is ending it's a process
Like water wheel churning
As it goes up it drops water as it goes down fills water
So release and fill are the two side of
Anything
If I flow gently no one bothers
But if I become scanty worries bother.
So I pray let me be the water
Who wants to flow
Crossing over soft pebbles or hard rocks
But i still flow on and on
Wind stirs me invoking restlessness
But I realise it is not to be
I have to flow gently
Encopassing all that comes on my way
I pray let this be me gentle and unperturbed
Flowing is my destiny
In life and after
Swap

In the atmosphere of hate

Thanks for being early
In the routine of late

Thanks for opening
Your heart's gate

You are lovely
Your kindness is innate

I will wait for you
Let's see what is our fate

You can buy me with your smile
Is it very much rate?

I wanna be with you
Will you be my mate?

Everyday I feel the strain
As I am drowing from the pain
It's getting hard to stand
As I play the game of life with the deadmans hand
I look in the mirror and dont recognize the man staring back at me
Everyday is the same
I look to heaven as i burn down in the flames
Wishing the outcome would change
Tears run down my face
As I know I'll never leave this place
God knows I tried to live right
But my demons hide in plain sight
I got one shot to change this time
But I'm serving 25 to life
Its been a rough life so far
Lost alot of family
Even tried to end my life
Its been a hell of a ride
I'm just a troubled soul
Looking for love
I lay my heart on the line
Let it fly on the wings of a dove
Sometimes I look to the sky
And I wonder why
This is my life
This is the way it goes

My mind is screaming to no end.
It’s getting harder to pretend
My heart is hurting.
I’m worrying for you.
Don’t let this fear take over me.
Close my eyes and count from three.
It’s my worry that starts to consume
The only thing that matters is you.
Hold me back my mind is racing.
Take me to the place that I call home.
Sick and deprived
At least you’re alive.
I’m so afraid
But I know you won’t go away.

Pinky promises mean so much.
The ones we made though we can’t touch.
I’m burying my fear to save us from the darkness that’s creeping closer.
Are there answers we will find?
You’re constantly on my mind.
We’ve come so far
We left behind
The hurt we felt so long ago.
I’m right here as you know.
I can never let you go.
You mean so much to me.
Only with you I am complete.
One day my arms will wrap around you.
Deep inside we both know it’s true.
We just have to see through
The fog that covers the road ahead.
Don’t be afraid. I’m right here.
I’m writing this for you dear.
When your eyes close
When you go to sleep.
Know my heart is Forever your’s to keep.

At the crossroads between holding onto my faith or escaping from this fate
Is it wrong to write this down? Is it right to be left between a choice to never even love or hate?
At the gallows, slowly pressing forward towards that sweet escape...
From a death that leaves behind a fainted memory to take our place
And a life that leaves behind nothing more than just a bitter taste...
Is this our time to rise and react to every piece we use to recreate our broken destiny?
Or is this just the way to taint the best of me? Or maybe there’s poison in the recipe?
Or maybe we never had the time to rediscover our place in this moment, we only lived just to die?
Maybe we were just a waste of time with time to waste...
Maybe we were another lost piece of this grand and divine puzzle just trying to find our place?
Who’s to know.. who’s to say?

Its time to stop falling for government ploys.
To stop being played like government toys.
Its time to resume a conversation.
To start a process of healing nations.
Lets focus the anger and hate.
On the media and government who set the bait.

You don't have to hate someone if you disagree.
Even if its fundamentally.
Are we not all somehow lost.
Is not finding a way forward too high a cost

I've travelled a different path to you.
This doesn't mean there's no common ground.
There is always mortar to build bridges.
A compromise can be mostly found.

Our views may conflict on things deep within our souls.
Yet this doesn't mean we have to hate each other,
Or sometimes have some common goals.

Life is way too short to fall out over points of view.
I feel pain and bleed just like you do.

Don't **** me because I pray to a different God.
Or try to convert me through violent means.
It's just as stupid as hating me,
Because I wear trousers and you wear jeans.

Forget about borders , status, creed or class.
Hate breeds hate but agreements can last.
The future need not be determined by the past.

Its possible to disagree or have principles that may have conflictions.
But find compromise,
Without
Sacrificing deep convictions.

The world has become a twisted place.
A moral compass that's severely skewed.
We listen to yarns that governments and media spin.
Rather than accept the obvious truths.

Forget for now about exploring space.
We're not ready for what we may find.
First lets all find each other.
Lets break the chains that continue to bind.

Its time to look at how the world is run.
To see injustice through untainted eyes.
To build bridges that bring men together.
To start to make right the wrongs and value each others lifes.

Its ok to disagree but not to **** and maim.
Especially based on hate of someones colour of skin or in your gods name.

Its ok to enjoy your culture or practice your beliefs.
But not ok that live in extravagant excess while others barely survive on city streets.

My soul grieves and heart is heavy, when I see what this world has become.
Man has achieved so much.
Yet so much more can be done.

I've walked a different path to you
It doesn't mean compromise can't be found.
We simply have to try to coexist.
Our survival depends on finding common ground.

I feel the change in my DNA
Once lost but now I see the way
What I call normal you would call insane
The greatest moments of my life were when I was in pain
Learning not to squirm, gaining some restraint
Forgetting temptation, learning to refrain
From giving in, the pain left me trained
Changes in my coding, I'll never be the same
Stronger than before, if only you could see me now
I ******* survived, i bet you're wondering how
Now I'm the one grinning, and you're left with a frown
Now we are equals, no one wears the crown
Met with a new fear that you have never known
The fear of being replaced and kicked off of your throne
Until you feel true pain you'll never learn to grow
This is your punishment, to reap what you've sown

Your smile and the way you look at me got me feeling something I thought just wasn't for me.
You see I'm usually the quiet guy who can't wait for the days end but lately, I've been waking up with a smile and singing songs that weren't meant for anything but good days, you know the kind you cant help but nod your head to.
I leap at my phone when it rings instead of just letting it go to voicemail and latley,  I've been walking with some purpose in my step, my head held high, and a ****** expression I'm not used to wearing.
And lately I'm writing about things that make me smile instead of just filling pages with negative thoughts. It's hard to have a bad day when everytime I close my eyes I can see you smiling, it makes me hope I'll get to keep feeling what I've been feeling lately...

Only the jester remains,
How?
No one knows,
For those secrets remain unanswered,
But in the corner of a shattered and tortured mind
one thing remains,
Revenge!!!
Those that thought to silence him
underestimated his will to survive,
And in that they live in only a fool's paradise,
Time comes full circle,
And revenge will be mine!
For justice remains to be served...
cold ...
laughter haunts a hallow mind,
It's only a matter of waiting,
This atrocity will be forgotten
but not by the jester,
My time will come!

To die is the final act of love,
Nourish the earth so others can live.
Like the leafs of the tree,
falls gently to the ground.
Releasing their goodness,
without making a sound.

Die to the self  you think you to be,
die to the ego if you want to be free.
Remembering how you loved as a child,
Before thoughts about life started driving you wild.
You started to blame everyone else,
For all of your pain never yourself.
The way you think was created by you.,
Mind now in control what can you do.

You are afraid to see the mind is not true,
all that you know is a lie told to you.
Why do profits and wisemen, want to silence the mind,
Willing to die to evolve all of mankind
If even one person understands to evolve.
happily they die for the truth to resolve.

This is why ultimate love is to die,
For only in death will new life arise.
Energy used then must dissolve,
nourishing the earth so new life can evolve
Live for today share your love and your truth,
nourish new life like the bud and the youth.
Love yourself and all that you be,
then give it away to all that you see.

       Patrick ramsey

We who know so little on the Earth so vast,
What is future, what is past
What is good news and what is bad,
In the life of the Yang and the Yin,
Fusing Hamlet together again.
Is everything gain or lost,
Fortune and misfortune,
Good or bad, happy or sad,
Or the consequence of the flowers
In the garden behind the fence?
a source so simple
penned the wellspring of words
a painted fable upon the fields
of the king who tried to make the Sun
for those blind to the honest beauty of the stars
and put the stars into order
for them to understand
the mountains refuse to move
it is their last stand
against submitting to be owned by man
So tree and lake and fountain
tall and deep and flowing
the sea is silent, the ice is melting
the aim of fury is clear
shall the earth endure
invites the sea
or be done, sunk, and swallowed amid oceans
full of new, and difficult emotions
We are the garden cancer
Upon the bird
Upon the flower
Upon the mountain
Upon the sea
We have taken many forms
And spread our disease
Upon the ice-fields
upon the glacier snow
Upon the quaking ground
Where the hollow children go.

Depression

By Patrick ramsey

Talk depression
But you're no exception
Feel the attention
Which sparks your aggression
Hating when all their eyes are on you
Brought to light everything that you do
Feeling like you can't hide out of view
The more that you fight it, the more that you lose
Slipping further, don't know who to blame
It's yourself but now you're too ashamed
To admit it, so you turn away
Just a pawn who's still stuck in the game
You really don't know how to quit
On the trigger, your finger just slipped
You felt it fade fast when the bullet hit
Cut short, the lifeline got clipped

This house scars my mind and all peace it surely blocks
All along the wooden walls are noisy little clocks
A foul constant reminder that time is running out
The sounds of all the ticks and tocks still fill my head with doubt
The fear of time so hard for me to ever really understand
Because the fear of time is something only known to man
For we're the ones who created time and all that it entails
We built the very tracks with which our train of thought derails
So clearly we're the harbingers of our own insanity
We brought on every ounce of pain recieved from this calamity

The world can’t break you

Tell me are you afraid
Of the pain?
Of your skin
Separating?
Those words they said
That makes you wish you were dead

Escape.
Release.
Only wanting to rest in peace.
Can’t take the hurt.
Thinking you can’t feel worse.
It’s like a curse.

Don’t say the sky is weighing you down.
Focus on the sound of your heart pounding against your chest.
I know you feel fear at its best,
But let them see you soar.

Fight back with a roar.
Don’t flirt with fear anymore.
Deep inside your core
You’re worth more.
Stand strong against the wind.
Stand back up if you fall down again.
I promise the pain will end.
Soon enough.

The world doesn’t play nice
But make it think twice
Stay strong
Be tough.
You may feel you’re worthless,
But you’re a diamond in the rough.
Don’t wish for an endless night.
Let serenity tuck you in tonight.
Show them your inner light
Rise again, ready to fight.

Do you know what its like to feel alone in a room full of people?
Do you know what it’s like to have a gaping hole inside you?
No matter where you go or what you do something feels missing.
I’m searching but it’s so dark.
It’s so dark that I can’t find my way out.
I’m searching but I’m so lost.
I’m so lost that I don’t even recognize myself anymore.
I stare in the mirror trying to find the beauty I once saw so prevalently.
But now all I see is a vessel.
A vessel that once held so much love for a man, it lost love for itself.
A vessel that once carried two children.
But when they vacated they too took a piece with them.
This body is nothing but a reminder of everything I am not.
Not beautiful.
Not loved.
Not whole.
I am nothing but a body.
And this body has been broken down.
This body has been wounded.
This body has been stolen.
I try to find peace somewhere, anywhere.
I’m grasping for just a thread.
That’s all I need.
But it’s so dark and I’m so lost.

Line upon line, precept by precept. The best time to learn something is right now, and seeking after wisdom is the surest way to grow.

TELL ME

Tell me in whispers
Tell me in shouts
Let the vision fly golden
Its presence announce

Tell me by roadside
Or in a comfortable home
On the ocean wide
Or in the forest's loam

Tell me in stories
In poems, in rhyme
Tell me all at once
Or from time to time

Tell me in the cold
Or the barren heat
No matter the journey
Or the ache of my feet

Tell me by singing
Or by pronouncing aloud
Under the shine of the sun
Or the shade of a cloud

Tell me by reading
Or from word of mouth
From dawn until dusk
From the north to the south

Tell me in hope
Or in the midst of despair
To purify the water
To clear the choked air

Tell me in anger
Or in laughter and joy
The truths you still know
The promise you employ

Tell me with friends
Or one-on-one
In a glorious villa
Or a desperate slum

Tell me, please tell me
The things of the Lord
The breastplate of righteousness
The Spirit-edged sword

Tell me, please tell me
The things I must know
How to gather in harvest
To reap what I sow

Tell me, please tell me
All you can spare
The grief and the flame
The wheat and the tare

Tell me, please tell me
Your word and your song
Truth be my guide
To lead me along

Tell me your faith
The words in your heart
The end of your journey
Is where I will start.

Tell me, please tell me
And I'll listen, I'm sure
Scribe your words in my soul
And learn to be pure.

This house scars my mind and all peace it surely blocks
All along the wooden walls are noisy little clocks
A foul constant reminder that time is running out
The sounds of all the ticks and tocks still fill my head with doubt
The fear of time so hard for me to ever really understand
Because the fear of time is something only known to man
For we're the ones who created time and all that it entails
We built the very tracks with which our train of thought derails
So clearly we're the harbingers of our own insanity
We brought on every ounce of pain recieved from this calamity

My gaze is fixed on a beautiful sight
Slick glass
Mirrors
The water colored sky
The sunlight sitting bright
On the tree line
I take a good look at a truly astounding sight

My eyes shut
Taking in the moment
The slightest breeze bending the trees
A fish popping the water's top
Birds chirping in the distance
Crickets beginning to hum
My eyelids rise

The colored sky
Grows faint
The warmth from the sun
Has left my face
I linger another moment
Listening to the cricket choir
Singing me their tune
While you're out there thinking of me
I'm here thinking of you

I am now living
As I shall die
A death that comes so slow
In a life fleeting
At the speed of light
At weighted speed of thought
In dying days I must relive
Every moment
Of every mistake
Of every sin
Till that day
Over and over
Oh so slowly ever over again
Patient must be each breath
Till then

I guess it's time to open my eyes
I tried and I tried
Caught tears that I cried
Stoke the flames and watch em all rise
Burn up from inside
The hope for love died
There's nothing here left to hide
With every stride
Two steps back I slide
Pray that god takes me tonight
Turn off the light
And kiss me goodbye

Frail and weak, I see I can't escape
This life is hell, this life is great
None of it real, what a strange fate
This life is hell, this life is great
You and me, holding on to self-hate
This life is hell, this life is great
You sing, and I'll write, and we'll both break
This life is hell, this life is great...

It's dark in the heart
Of a sinner from the start
And mine is no exception
So I tore it all apart
And left it in the gutter
Followed the footsteps of my mother
And now before I sleep at night I hear her ghost mutter
"This is your debt
That ends in your death
And you can't forget
All of your regret"

write

we dont write
to romanticize
or to beautify

we write to understand
ourselves and
purge our pain

its not beautiful
to live this way

but it is
a means to survive