This isn't how I thought our story would end
I always thought you'd find your way back to me
Back to us,
Back to yourself again

But I suppose it was my mistake
I thought we we were written by poets
But we were written by the Brothers Grimm

We were never a love story, we were a tragedy

Sometimes you become
The things you love the most
When you lose them

I used to be the butterfly
Safe in my chrysalis
Metamorphosing

You were my moth
Eating away at my stomach
Like I was made of keraitn

You were like nothing
That I'd ever seen
That I'd ever dreamed

You were my moth among butterflies

You saw things in me
That I couldn't see for myself
That no one else tried to find

You consumed my mind
Grew fields of promises
Roots too deep to ever unearth

And I wish I could say
You became the butterfly
Transforming, healing

But I fear you never will
Maybe that is why
I became the moth

To eat whatever it is that's rotting you away

No matter how much of my soul
I flood into my words
I will remain unseen
Because when stars aren't in the sky
They fall into corners
Where they no longer shine

True muses never lose their luster
They just change the way they shine
You may not be sunlight on a crystal anymore
Nor the colors that fall through the cracks of a cloud
But you will always have little pieces
Of what we used to be
In those smokey quartz eyes
No matter how distorted our story becomes
To me, you will always glow
Like you have the sun in your veins

I thought I would always write
Lovely words for you our whole life
That I would always be the moth
Drawn to your steady flame
But all fires burn out
No matter how eternal their light seems
And all moths return to dust
No matter how immortal their dreams

He thinks that his withdrawal
Will soften the blow
That his absence
Will numb me like anesthetics
But he doesn't realize
That even if
He's killing me slowly
I'm still bleeding all the same
That even if
I'm suffocated blind
I'm still going to gasp for air

The people around you
Are failing you
And I feel like I'm failing too
Your mind was cut deeply
Just as your heart was
And instead of being stitched
Mended and medicated
The wounds were left
To scar and widen

Flashbacks haunt you
With no reprieve
The memories keep you awake
Keep you hostage
And your heart
Can only seem
To further break
So you take
Whatever vice you can
To make the pain
Pause and wait

Every time you chase
Your momentary escape
It will get shorter
Your cure
Will become
Your poison
The crutch you have
Is faulty and made of sand
It is time instead
To reach out
To something solid
To take a hand

When I saw your eyes
In the photos I was sent
They were empty
They were hopeless
Maybe it was the alcohol
Maybe it was pain killers
But they were not hiding
The torment

They say eyes
Are a window
To our souls
And in your eyes I can tell
Your soul is fractured
Like a glass
That has spiderwebbed
The more you chip at it
The closer you get
To shattering what remains

I suppose no one has told you
You are allowed to be happy

It is time to forgive
Yourself, the incident, the memories
Forgiving isn't forgetting
You are allowed forgiveness
It is time to stop forbidding yourself
From moving on
From getting help
It is time to stop

You are too young to be chasing halos