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Oh, what a fool I was,
to believe in fairytales
and happily ever afters

Oh, how terribly naive
to let you back in
through the revolving door,
such an easy way out

I guess I should've known you were lying
when you told me you cared
and looked away,
blinking twice
even your body
refused a lie so bold

I should have been weary
of that glassy stare
knowing all the while
that as you held me
you weren't really there

But oh darling, I was just a girl
in love with a boy
whose heart was cold and broken
and bred to destroy.
stone ground mustard Venus burns. She's not concerned that constant falling
and orbits, elliptical - are the same thing.
Her eyes are deaf. My eyes adapt to the pattern
that rattles the chain of events.
my Spartan theories dangle in dubiousness.
I find a trap, and call it Seattle... for i see cattle -
grazing a state of mind; north, north west of what God meant.
washing tons of pocket lint by hand.
chewing their cud
in the dark. meanwhile - outside the ranch...
My eyes refract. ***** and un-***** in the black lacquer that came -
with the oblique miracle. they sustain things that would sunder a doll-eyed bovine
to ever breach The Fence.
my hardened arteries jangle like numinous. I pine and snap ruinous barbs from Death's
prattle... for i see battle, razing the Grace of Time
more at war, than at our best. more -
bereft of what Reason defends.  
tossing guns at bullets
by telekinesis.

[ undefined ]


i come from where i've never been. you were there. and ewe were there; fleeced and bleating
in the snow that fell as soon as shearing ceased. i recall, you were never there. but remember
passing you by... shilling an ocean roar you swore you'd plucked from a Seashell -
salvaged from the divine dry sockets of Poseidon's skull.
you were hawking your unawares. i played a flute made of question marks and glass drum skins.
i went where my stride was inclined, and never where i went to.
i never arrived by approaching the destination. only by always being somewhere else
till i got there. i came from where i'd never been and -
ain't been Nowhere since.

but i'm sure i pass
through There

ever since.
catch the last wave and i'll be there
combing the beachhead of our misery
swollen with big love, choking on the theory of our negative heavens
you and i,
we marvel at the heresy of our wisdom
and cherish no giant over divine
we david the furies that are nephelim
but conjure no gods where the plastic can't be useful
we dunder in the bluff of innocent cupids
we -
the idiots on the cliff -
dancing
when the glockenspiel itches !
clock faced and *** up
i'll be there with black honey, " With You "
no doubt
pondering the wrinkles in your sleep breath.
the sweet killing of tomcats and mackerels
the plain fact that our noses
are numb from eskimo kissing
in the igloo of our perpetual alaska
the arctic furnace of our wild fires of pure illusion
to trod stunning over hell's paradise
and catch a glimpse of snarky
stark Silence...

You
catch the last wave -
and i'll be nothing but the singing bones of the wind
in the throes of an ****** of  " need you "  and only you.
a chosen cyclone from heaven
i'll be just a little boy
in the clutches of a dead teddy
where the poppies sing
hallelujah !
and our hearts blight the orchid of our accord.
and down -
comes, what ?
what do we do ? what could we possibly ?
we hopscotch the bonnets
and glue ravenous bumblebees
to a blanket
of snow.

cause we have the technology -
we can disassemble it...

discretely.
Nobody likes anyone whose perfect.
yet how come we all strive to be perfection?
seems like we always want what we don't need.
we make it our every effort to be flawless for everyone else.
caring so much about the way others see us,
we forget to just be our selves...
Feeling so disconnected from the world
yet trying so hard just to feel accepted
we forget what it means to just be, without striving all the time.
never realizing that perfection is the you, without trying.
7/11/13
All my numbers are aligned.
We make taco runs in the ghetto by that Elmood sign.
Silly.
Drive an hour, love for three
You wouldn't believe it
if you where there with me.

Jealousy comes in like an X on an 18.
Waste of time, energy and emotional fiend.

He never stays this way long.
11 minuites at best.
Can't wait to be somewhere.
Get some ******* rest.

New day. Woken by the happy kisses of a giant rotwieller.
Something sad in me made the love pour outta her.
She wants me here.
They both do.
I want them too.
I want something new.

Saw u today.
U told me u hated me.
Told me u all do.
What do u want me to say to you?
Blame me. Didn't even say hey to me.
Someone should blame me
since I know better than to now.
Its not about me.
I just want you to HEAR me.
But how?
I'm better off how I am now
you'll see

I wish I could tell you I love you, dad
don't yell at me, dad
I've never done anything to you, dad
Stop screaming. Don't push me.
I won't push back.
Theres That struggle again.
Somewhere between agape and justice.

Neon Cathedrials guide my way from city to street.
The home is real. Find it for me.
Create it if need be.

Macklemore says the licqor store stays open later than the churches and ****
Ain't that the truth.
Someone save me, help me, anymore I've got nothing to lose.

Staying with old friends,
Some good
Some bad
All stuggling.
Man.
That struggle is sad.
All around us.
You and I.
You find that beauty. You stay #skyhigh.

And as I sit here. Tear stained, hungry and bruised...
I feel hopeful
Not used.

I can be better.
Came out of your shadow brighter.
How much more will love endure?

It was always too dark through childhood to see too clear.
Maybe
Just maybe
We are all to blame.
Save me.

You know what else
Someone once said.
"Fathers be good to your daughters. Daughters will love like you do"
You remember that guy?
Yeah, me too.
Look around and see, a lot of big topics:
Mostly media nonsense and a global no-fix.

Front Line.
Headlines.
"Natural" disasters
Buddhists
Scientists
Pastors

Government Theories.
Political conspiracy, you'll see.

We all claim to want "CHANGE"
For what?
10 Lanes, bigger planes, sky trains?

Is this the change you all are waiting for?
Hoping for?
Killing for?
Dying for.
This change has knocked us down to the floor.

It's sad but it's true
my buddy in Garfield said "Come Through,
meet me at the corner store
Angel, I need to tell you more."

He says, "The struggle is real,
the pain I feel
IT consumes us daily.
Lets all get away from this, maybe."

Even the girls in County
are all standing strong.
Saying, "What we did was wrong."

"I don't do things, I've done things."
Says one girl quietly.
21 years old,
lived her whole life in sobriety.

Tears in her eyes, twinkling
"I want change, we all do.
We see the change in you.
We hope you see it too."
The night falls
Dimming the tensions and strife these lonely days bestow
as she holds tightly to her phone
His voice singing in her ears
And she gazes at the moon only seeing his face
Slipping into a dream of his warm embrace
Imagining heaven beside him
His words guide her
Displacing the angst of love loss
Replacing it with the harmonious song of yearning hearts
He is the man in the moon
The missing puzzle piece
A new start building her up from the rubble of destructive thought
Tearing down her notions of not being good enough
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