Every day I walk I wait
Listening to people open the gate
The gate of stars the gate I see
Looks very heavenly
The way it spins the way it moves
Looking at peoples shoes
The day I walk in the gate
I will sit and wait
Wait for people to walk through
I shall get some fancy shoe
When I do yes I say
The gate shall be opened to may

You go behind my back as I am away
As you started to talk I chose to stay
You talk about me starting to feed lies
how could you try to make me cry
to save yourself and leave me to rot
While I hide listening to you speak in pride
I can't believe what I see
A liar right in front of me
And I thought you could be my friend
forever until the end
You bit my back out you do it well
Now this back it already swollen
You made it swell so well
Chomping biting does it taste well
Or do you just like to make my back swell.

What is this feeling inside of me?
This hurt feeling that isn’t a feeling of glee
The water that drains from my cheeks it sparkles
Hardening the heart turning into charcoal
The painting it speaks
Saying how its paint leaks
What is this feeling inside of me?
Boom boom my head is pounding
Only I can hear the hardening sounding
Like it will break my heart
Like it will tear me apart
The rainy ripples of rippling tears
The sound of my heart rate in my ears
The squeezing feeling of this leaking touch
This feeling must be because of life to too much

The pounding of the finger bleed
The finger telling what it needs
The wound is dripping pour
The blood that's gushing more and more
How will it feel in my tomb
When i have a bigger wound
When the red water makes an ocean
When the water becomes a thick like potion
When the numb feeling is all around
Laying in the ocean as i drown
Will feelings of sadness evaporate
Or terrible feelings such as hate
Will the red water aspire
To take away my desire
Will the happiness I once feel
Truly be real
Will people care about me
Or the dirt they will see
As im in that red ocean
Drowning in that thick potion
Void of all emotion
Will they be there on that day
In white i lay
Will they see me
Or the doll that i'll be

I slowly walk the air starts blow
It is coming out from bellow
The monster is released
Every time the cheeks start to move from the west and the east
The smell was so bad it made everyone made
The gas starts to come
The smell is so bad where is everyone
Check one check to the gasses smell Peewu
I couldn’t stand myself
Disgusting disgusting where is everyone else
The stray was no good the chemical was so strong
I looked around where do I belong
Oh, the beast will he stop
Maybe if I stay still
It doesn’t work
The beast is revealed
Gas gas where did the beast come from none  
It must be the stinky pet name starts with an M
He says the smell not so bad talk to me please
Wait wait I down on my knees
My stomach hurts I am going to die
I feel bad I think will cry.

What Why is what they say
What did you do
Why do you feel this way
Why do you ask me
Like i would say what i see
These words keep spinning in my head
I think i should go to bed
What why tell me they say
I don't feel like it today
Why don't you
What do you mean
Exactly what have you seen
Would they stop before i lose my mind
I think i will leave everything behind
Mind your own business i am not a crook
I think i might just hit the books
So why you ask
And what you say
I will not answer because you ask that every day

The way I Feel it is hard to explain
It feels like I am losing my brain
I want an apology I say in my head
I might just need to go to bed
The tip tap sound I see I dream
Is this as crazy as it seems
Every were I look I see
My madness eating at me
“I want it I need it” I hear
As I start to awaken everything disappears
The first thing I say when I awake
Is what I think “for goodness sake”  
Then my eyes start to twitch as I shake
I want that apology from her mouth
I must see her face to face
I go to her house say “Apologies”
She looks at me and laughs hee hee hee
“What for my darling dare I rather disappear”
I grit my teeth as I sit and stay
I close my eyes and what do I see
Oh no it is eating at me
“Resolve it resolve it” this is what it says
I wake up and say “sorry Please forgive me”
She says back “I should be apologizing so you see”
That is what she said then she added
“I did put that mouse under your bed.”

My bones I implore you to not stay still
I have to venture up this forlorn hill
Though you are stiff
I catch a whiff
Of the saddening future that which I can’t stand
How I will stare at my empty hand
How the warmth of your touch is gone
I feel as vulnerable as a baby fawn
It hurts so much but I still struggle
Trying to put together this puzzle
Trying to understand what is real
Will this dream soon reveal
This illusion genjutsu is fake
Or are my thoughts all a mistake
I can’t believe what plays through my head
Is it true that you are really dead?
In a constant loop of time
My saddest moments play on rewind
The perennial river meets the eye
So I can’t help but constantly cry

The cold winter night is sad and dreary
My hands that fold
My head that’s bold
This sleepy feeling makes me leery
Being leery makes me weary
This winter nights is so cold
It makes me feel like I am old
Trying to stay awake is making me teary
I will not let up to this sleepy desire
The coldness will not bring me down
Whatever I do I will not tire
So I will try not to put on a frown
Staying awake is what I aspire If I go to sleep I will be a clown

My thoughts are killing me so bad
I think I may be going mad
The voice I hear inside my head
Makes me want to go to bed
My head it starts to hurt
My mouth it starts to blurt
My eye it starts to cry
My mind it starts to lie
The things that I hear
Don't make me want to disappear
I will be friends with the voice in my head
I will walk straight to bed
I will not cry
My mind will never lie
And when I do this yes I say
Nothing bad shall happen to may.

An ornament of the table side
An ornament with no will to glide
An ornament doing nothing more
Than being brought with you
Is such a bore
Being dragged around in gift rap fashion
No one really cares about my passion
They may make conversation with me
But I am an object and nothing to see
Im an object with nowhere to be
And They’re all bored of me
I'm quiet speak less
Think about how I'm blessed
To be an ornament with nothing to say
So people can’t ruin my day
They see me but I'm invisible in a way
I am there but only for display
Should I become a person or should i stay what i am
A pretty ornament that is bland
A visible object that not there in the same
An ornament with only a name

A promise is a promise don't say no
when you have a promise  that has to go
A promise is a promise don't ask why
when you make a promise for fill it until you die
when I see you I hound you so bad
I don't intend to make you mad
those who don't for fill their promise now
will not be able to die with a smile
the smile of a happy person whose promise is paid
that smile on their face will not be delayed
so make promises that you can keep make it well
unless you don't want to die with a smile

The morbid feeling one feels in the rain
The feeling of both sorrow and disdain
Shall I explain the morbid feeling one feels in the rain
Shall I explain the feeling of both sorrow and disdain
The feet that is frozen so
The feet that with one tap will break apart and go
The hands that shake of one who is mad
This maddening feeling of what you once had
The sky that cries full of pain
Making the blood drip full of disdain
It hurts it hurts as you fall on the ground
The wet ground that makes a splashing sound
Your clothes are wet your new white gown
You hear this sound as you frown
You now have gone through this blunder
But the rain cries as your feelings are cast asunder
And now you remember how you feel
The crying sky starts to reveal
You are one with the sky
What you really really really want to do is cry

It's intriguing indeed
how I feel the need
To raise myself higher
While burning on fire
It's interesting so
how I'd love to go
And raise myself higher
While burning on fire
The color is bright
Especially in the night
It colors the soul in different fashion's
Whilst burning with different passions
It hurts so much the fiery the touch
It burn so much whilst burning I clutch
Though through this pain
My being rearranged
And raised itself higher
While burning on fire
To something more wiser  
Listening to my advisor
My teacher through all the pain
The fire that has been flain
And now I really love the fire
That helps me raise myself higher
While burning on fire

Was I a liar
Was I telling the truth
Trying to get higher
I almost got hit the ruff
I heard you talking
Lies about me
Did you really think my ears
And my eyes couldn't see
It hurt knowing I was all alone
Not even strong enough to grab a phone
I had no calls to make
Knowing that my head started to ache
She came to me is my deepest despair
She told me I should not lose one hair
Against me they were that was obvious now
Now what should I do?
And the last question
And How?

Your Pretty gorgeous beautiful and more
Thinking about if you believe this is such a chore
Do you believe these compliments? I wander
Playing this in my head casts my brain asunder
Really really then why
Why do you hit me with snark remarks thinking it will fly
I hear you I hear you loud and laughing
I thought maybe your mind would change
But my appearance doesn't rearrange
And I am hiding the torment even more
Crying inside is such a bore
This is why my life has become such a chore

Staring at guilt as I sigh
If I stay with guilt I can never fly
I have this conscience in my head
Being with Guilt is something I oh so Dread
I can no longer stand it looking at it's face
Always trying to make me feel disgrace
No more no longer
With out guilt I will be much stronger
I have to get rid of it sooner than later
I can no longer be it's personal cater
If I jump on it now there's no going back
I have to wait for the perfect time to attack
I wait and wait looking at it's face
For goodness sake this is not a race
I'll **** it I'll **** it while laughing too
Once it is gone I will no longer feel blue
I jump on guilt as fast as I can
It tries to fight back can no longer stand
I stab I slit I choke it and smother
Now I can no longer hear a stutter
I hit and hit and maybe do more
Without guilt my life won't be such a bore
Now I wonder will the blood stop coming
While I look at this stream I can't stop humming
My life awaits isn't that nice
With guilt gone I no longer have to pay such a big price
Now it's gone no more guilt
Now my head won't tilt
Chin up looking high
I see the sun in the sky
Yes Now Now Now I can finally fly

I know how you feel
When you say things you reveal
Exactly how you feel
About me how you don't like what you see
I don't like it either you don't have to tell me
Are you trying to put me in pain
I can tell that you want me to drown in the rain
In front of everyone as if it's a show
I will not let these feeling go
These feelings of be hurt betrayed and more
These feelings that stop life from being such a bore
I can't believe you would say such a thing
Everytime I remember it my head starts to  ring
But then again I already knew
How you felt was true
How I felt was blue
But that obviously meant nothing to you

I want to live of course I do
Do I want to wake up each morning just to tie my shoe?
Of course not I want to do more
I don't want my life to stay such a bore
Do I want to get up just to sleep?
Do I want to just stand up out of my bed and internally weep?
I ask this question to myself on different days
Every time it comes to my head the answer delays
Smiling? Am I happy? Laughing? am I sad?
Let's not act like my acting is bad
I want to live see every day by
I want to watch, watch time fly
me maybe I should cry
maybe I should smile more
Maybe I shouldn't see things as such a bore
Maybe I could go day by day showing emotions
As my real emotions stay drowned in different potions
Sounds good act like planned
Maybe then everything won't be so bland

I feel it you know
The depths of despair drawing down
The feeling that will only make me frown
The sound of the leaking dripping sink
Makes me think of dark black ink
That drains from the eyes
As time seemingly flies
Oh this sinking feeling
Do you know why
Why every moment I feel it, inside I cry
Do I know why
How should I as I watch time fly
Like a bird slowly flying away
As it goes I want it to stay
I want it to stay so I can end that bird I can't let it get away
Then maybe I won't feel it you know
The feeling that makes the ink drip from my face like so
Maybe then this horrid feeling will go

The could neither be in the West, South, or East I clutch
I could not be in these places without yearning for your touch
So soft so fluffy tethered in passion
When I am feeling you I don't have to worry about fashion
You give me comfort a piece of mind
You are something I always hate leaving behind
Your silence is something I treasure so
You have a beautiful evening glow
I can laugh, smile, scream, cry
When I am with you, I always breathe a sigh
Of relief because you take away my grief
This poem is to you my lovely bed
You are the one and only place I can rest my head