Locked in this frightening place
it's a nightmare yet I'm awake
All alone,  how long has it been?
Not sure how much I can take

Forgetting who I can call
can't even remember their names
I still can't tell how long it's been
Have I been like this for days?

Reflections in the mirror
they seem to be mocking me
I want to escape this place
but it's a condition called Dementia you see

Starting off with a direction
then losing all idea of my plan
sometimes I'm just in my own world
not worrying about who I am

At the end of each exhausting day
during darkness and a thousand chills
my reality is again tainted
brutally bending my mind further still

It's a kiss
you can sink into
forgetting time
unable to remember
if it's day or night.
Plump, full mouths
lips
moist,
parted
Tips of tongues,  teasing
tasting
enticing.
Our mouths
are busy
but my body
feels jolts of electricity
elsewhere,  in other places

and we've barely even begun!

Solitary bricks,
walls
ripped apart
It mirrors
how I once felt.
Each piece
reflects
forgotten moments,
they flash before me.
I smile,  painfully
but the memories are soon gone.
I cling though,
unable to release
this ****** habit.
The 'moments'
fade too quickly
yet frequent my mind
frequently.
It is 'meant to be'.
Solitary bricks
scrambled upon the ground
chaotic,  unregimented
resembling a mind, crumbling
and a heart, broken.

I lost my inner poet
apparently she was last seen
just staring idly into space

She was sitting with her notebook,
gently pondering
in a quiet, tucked away place

I could only see the back of her
she wouldn't turn around
I so wanted to see her face

She was always so quiet
and very often reflective
working at her own steady pace

Not only am I left without poetry
I am also lost for words
she may have taken them all
along with my grace

The search will continue
maybe until the end of my days
as I fear she's left no trace

(written for me by my very good friend Mike Hauser)


I spend most of my adult life
by the shore
Gazing at the pounding waves
Like life, I see how
they push as they pull
the foundation
that has been laid

The grains of sand
are like splinters of my soul
that have been worn down
with time

Eroding edges
by a mothers' control
a nature very dissimilar
to mine

I watch as a child,
too close to the shore
builds a castle in the sand
What the waves wash away
she tries to rebuild
In this, I see my childhood
once again

With the setting of the sun
thoughts come to mind
of my life's beginning
as well as its end
Where the things of the past
I find so hard to forget
and even harder to forgive

I know what I must do
it's there in front of me
Forgiveness can be
my only release
I leave it all behind
as I stand to my feet
and I walk further
down the beach.

◆◆◆◆


How can it still so often feel

       like an eternity

               since our last touch

                     when we were together

                           only days before




                        It is the closest thing

                    to a beautiful torment,

                my throat squeezes a sound

             from me, that makes us fear

      an end to this painful pleasure 

  is coming




             The fierce burning

                    that you're striving hard

                         to quench

                              will be in flames

                                   once again

                                        

                ­                  
                                    My hunger for you

                                will need to be fed

                             Your body

                         I fear

                    will be my

                sacrifice

                ◆◆◆◆

□   ... he tried to piece together
                               her
                                  soul
                      ­  with words

          they were scattered
                                   poetically
                                     'clinging'
      
            in an attempt
               to occupy the hollow darkness□

■Memories of the past
often force their way in
an invasive force
dark and ugly nightmares
it brings

Disturbing my sleep
evoking forgotten feelings
an intruder in the night
and my sanity it's stealing

Messing with my head
a chaotic storm inside
leaving my body fraught,
completely drained of life

Not much more of this
can I allow myself to take
mentally beaten now
all that remains
is a dull ache■

▪▪  We are very different sometimes

            'you and me'

When you're feeling down
                        the need for me
                                   for comfort

doesn't always seem necessary to you


        I always
                         lean
             in your direction

                I need skin, upon my skin
                      warm and gentle hands

                                upon my arm,

                                    upon my heart


                          I absorb the heat,
                             like a healing power

       Your gentle breathing reminds me
                                     that I am not alone

                                    I need that so much..
                                                   I need you..
                                        

                 ­           I wonder why
                               you don't always
                                   need me
                                      this way  ▪▪

I think I might be evil
or a wicked witch maybe
each time my spouse is annoying
he acquires a curious injury!

It's not really a conscious thought
that goes through my mind
although it really seems to work
in my favour, I find!

He'll try to be sarcastic
and think he's really funny
he may be brave enough to mention
that I don't earn all the money

but when he begins to stand
and maybe try walking
he'll almost trip over
and feel that he's suffering

He joked about my weight one day
then tried to run and flee
I just sat there 'glaring' at him
hearing a shocking 'crack' from his knee

So maybe I am a witch
It really makes me wonder
while he's writhing in pain by my feet
I'll just sit here and ponder

; )

Please read in landscape



♡

     Sometimes
     when we are together
    
                                     intimately,

      you pause,

                        look deep into my eyes,
                                 peer into my soul almost

      Your body,  surrounds
                                         and com­pletes me

      There is never a time
                          when we are closer ..

                                      in body,

                                            in mind.
                                                           ­                       ♡