yes, i have not removed an inch of makeup, these
past three days.
i can still taste beers and united kingdom’s colloquialisms
on my burdened  
tongue.
and i have holes in stockings and black-and-blues
brushing my collarbone.
weekends, two and a half days, winding among unbolted
doors that lead to what you want but can’t admit
sober.
yes, i still feel every inch when i saunter through flaxen
leaves. how did i never notice such colors
before?
let the world be your oyster, except i’m vegetarian. so let it be my
sea. ocean. every drop that i never tasted.
fingers taste much better when they’re being
shoved beneath your front teeth.
five in the morning is the perfect time for screaming at lies
you cannot see through. for falling onto beds that cannot hold
more than one person but you trytrytry anyway.
yes, i do not know where i am going anymore,
but this tingling in my toes must mean
something.

Never Ending

It's always me people shove,
some memories, I can't dispose of.
There seems to be no end,
a real problem and there is no friend.
Life savings running bone dry,
I just can't figure out why.
Trying hard to be the best,
every little thing leaves me stressed.
Tired of things being so complicated,
always feeling so **** aggravated.
Living in a constant bitter regret,
no way out of this money debt.
Not even sure what life's about,
it ***** so bad, it makes me shout.
Why was I even born,
when I die will anybody mourn.
Wondering why I even care,
all these problems, with you I share.
Over forty and nothing to show,
motion of life, moving to slow.
Sick and tired of being sick and tired,
is living really that required.
Life is only getting worse,
since birth, someone put on a curse.
Got two kids, I never see,
why is all this **** happening to me.
Never got the right support,
my ship has never left the port.
Maybe things will never change,
people look at me like I'm very strange.
Will I ever catch a break,
maybe I'm dreaming and all this is fake.
Every night, I cry myself to sleep,
in my family, I'm the black sheep.
Almost living in the street,
tried to lie, steal and cheat.
Yes it's true that I'm insane,
can't fight this blister in my brain.
Well I've wasted enough of your time,
I may never write another rhyme.