Lizzie

Lizzie Nov 2021

So much can be said of water and stone--
Both when they are together,
and when they are alone.

Flowing water seems to be so free
When going forth without a boundary.
When walled in too much, it grows
To be stagnant and green,
and very, very gross.
But if left to wander, it disperses everywhere,
Sinks into the ground, evaporates in air.
Without the stone to hold the water in,
It spreads out sadly...
and finally grows thin.

Water is better when it has a road,
Becomes a laughing brook or a river broad.
Only then can it hurl onward in majesty,
Pouring over cliffs, and sometimes sleepily
Like the Tiber, gracing the bridges of Rome,
Or carrying the ships
slowly toward their home.
Without the confinement
Of a fountain's spout,
The water could not fly upwards and out.
Without the aqueducts as the water's course,
Neither would the city have its life source.

A stone, furthermore,
is worn away with time
When beaten by the wind
and the salty brine.
And thus running water
grinds away the stone
Till we must conclude, it's better all alone.
The rock alone can breach
the reaches of the sky,
With soaring mountaintops
and steeples piercing high.
But without water,
what purpose would serve
From the daring leap of the bridge's curve?
What good would be gotten from a rock that's whole
When there is no water
to carve out natural bowls?

Stone is better when touched by the rain,
No longer dry and dusty but beautiful again,
For the colours of a rock are best seen
When it's underwater,
lightweight and clean.
Stones are sturdy,
but unwelcoming and rough.
They sooner become smooth
with water's gentle touch.

Maybe we are different, a dichotomy,
But without you, what then would I be?

Lizzie Nov 2021

Dear Jon II

I miss you more and more with each passing day.
Absence makes the heart grow fonder, they say.
That's the beauty of it. But beauty is pain,
And I wish for awhile that it would go away.
Thinking of you always, I'm drowning in my grief.
I cry myself to sleep, where the comfort is brief,
And when I wake again, I find there's no relief.

I miss coming out of class and looking down to see
You on that bench, been waiting there for me,
One hand in your hair and the other in a book.
Now the bench is empty, and it pains me to look.
I miss running down the stacks, greeted by your smile
And you leaning backwards. And once in a awhile,
I'd be there first, and you'd greet me from behind.
Try as I might, I can't get you off my mind.

I miss so much about you that I don't know where to start,
From your head down to your toes, from your brain into your heart.
I miss holding hands and I miss holding each other.
I miss your intellect and our dialogues of laughter.
I miss your bouncing walk and your iconic gesture.
I miss your furrowed brow of deeply thinking thought.
I miss your boyish grin, and your misty eyes which caught
Me off guard, and brought me to a dead halt.
Oh, I miss these all and more, almost to a fault!

Oh Jon, I love you so much, increasingly so.
Sometimes it hurts so much that I don't know
Whether we're right for each other. But then,
It only hurts this much because I love you. Again,
I love you more and more because of who
You are, and nothing more. If only you knew
How much you mean to me, you and only you!
And some days it seems we're on parallel tracks,
Going the same way, but our understanding lacks;
And so we cannot touch, no matter how we try.
But the thing is that we do, together, you and I.
And we'll never stop trying, forever, you and I.

Lizzie Nov 2021

Grief #4

Maybe there's nothing left in my eyes,
Maybe I'm finally too tired to cry;
Either way, my face is now dry
And the numbness is setting in.

Maybe I've been shivering too long,
Maybe the wind isn't that strong;
Either way, the cold is gone,
And the numbness is setting in.

Maybe I'll feel better tomorrow,
Maybe I'll get used to the sorrow;
Either way, the pain will all go,
With the numbness settled in.

Lizzie Nov 2021

Grief #3

You never know what you have till it's gone,
But you've already left. It wasn't long
Till my heart began aching, and I'm so **** blue.
I can't remember how I would get through,
Or what things I used to do
All my life before I met you.
It must have been a solid hour
That I stood and cried in the steaming shower.
"It's not like he's dead," I had thought then
Before I realized, "Anything could happen."
Stupid tears, hateful thoughts, please go away.
I have no motivation. It's been only a day,
But it feels like it's been ever so long.
You don't know what you have till it's gone.

Lizzie Nov 2021

Grief #2

Sitting here on this cold, hard stone--
Once with you, but now all alone--
This cement block that's loved so dear,
Where many a laugh and many a tear
Have been shared and given here,
A place of the student and passerby,
But most of all, of you and I.
Sitting here, on this cold, hard stone,
My empty hands are missing home.

Lizzie Nov 2021

Grief #1

I wish I could believe
That somehow you were still here
But it's just too hard to stop the tears.
I cannot find a happy place,
'Cause everywhere there is a hole.
And everytime you are not there,
There's a falling in my soul.

I wish I could believe
That any moment now your feet
Would come crunching down this path.
I cannot stop the tears from falling
Like the cold, black waters of Merrimack,
And there is no comfort in this crying
When I keep wishing you were back.

I wish I could believe,
That you were sitting next to me.
I thought sitting by this stream
Would stop the streaming of my eyes,
But my sorrow cannot be sated,
When what was sweet, now is hated.

Lizzie Nov 2021

I Love You Today

Today I love you more than I can say,
Quite like I loved you yesterday.
Who knows what feelings tomorrow might bring,
But today my thoughts center on one thing:
I think we're compatible (we're made in the same batch).
Sometimes it seems we're a heaven-made match.
But playing with matches never ends up well:
What starts with a spark turns into hell.

Today I love you, I love you so much,
And I can never love you enough.
Every trouble that we overcome
Brings us closer. But there's one
Problem. Yes, the word is out;
I must confess: I have a doubt.

Today I love you--I love you more each day.
Oh, how I wish it would always be this way.
But the fears that whisper to me sometimes
Refuse to give vent to better love rhymes.
And so, my dearest, if I see it clearly,
When I'm hurting, it hurts too dearly.

But at least for today,
I love you, I love you, I love you.