It's days like this where I listen to sad songs about fathers abandoning their children and kneel on the big chair by the window, and look outside like I'm seven years old.
I didn't like seven years old.
I hated the first day of it.
I cried all of April twenty-forth that year.
I knelt on the big chair by the front window and felt the wind that I could see the trees felt.
The swayed and shimmered as if they could hear the music too.
Why didn't I sway and shimmer when the wind hit me?
I only got cold and determined.
Seven was the last time I thought that thought until now.
It took me long over a decade to answer that question.
I wish it was something lyrical, majestic, and deep.
It's not.
It's just science.
Sometimes science is sadder than fathers abandoning their children.

It seems it's here and there
But sometimes it's everywhere!

Thank you for the invitation,
But I'm afraid I must decline,
I know you've gone to such great lengths,
Mixing heaven and Earth and time.
Somehow from my perspective,
The reason doesn't match the rhyme.
I've been given every chance,
To win the fantastic prize,
But something in my depleted soul,
Believes nothing from these eyes.
I wish to thank you all,
For the trouble you've been through,
But when all is said and done,
Nothing I see is true.

We sat there,
Staring at each other,
Eyes fixed,
Knowing the others soul,
Turmoil turned to silence,
Waiting for what's next,
And for a very long time,
We waited,
Then you took my hand,
And said 'let's go',
I held your hand and asked 'where?',
'that way' you replied,
I was out of breath,
And followed,
Hands clasped,
Lulled into sleep,
Into a moment of dreams,
Dragged toward other stars,
Surrendered.

I love you and I always will.
Even when I get on your nerves,
when I annoy you,
and maybe am not the nicest.
                 *I love you and I always will.
                 Even when you don't want to trust me,
                 when you don't want to be around me,
                 but at the same time you do.
I love you and I always will.
For all the memories we have shared.
Every good one,
and every bad.
And for all of the ones to come.
                 I love you and I always will.
                 Even if you don't feel the way my heart
                 feels around you.
                 Or you don't understand the way
                 my soul kind of clicks whenever
                 you're here.
                 I don't understand it either.
                 I just know I have a million things to say,
                 and a lot of them,
                 I know you don't want to hear.
                 There's nothing wrong with that.

*But I love you and I always will.

I die a little every day it seems
When I close my eyes and fall into nothingness
And at times the short-lived death is made all the more furious
With knights fighting and demons slaying and the occasional dragon appearing

What  a risk it seems I take that, this short-lived death on any other day might
Shove me into a forever nothingness
I still go there every night just to test the waters
I die a little every day it seems

Oh, what I would give for the daily deaths to be a prolonged one
Then into another world I’d go
My world, from forever more and till eternity
So, I’ll die a little every day till I reach home
My home...I... want to go home...

The sunlight does not brighten
The warmth sends a chill.
The birds sing noise,
never song.
Darkness is a comfort,
silence company.