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Sunshine Girl Nov 2019
Anger and frustration
Pushed me,
It stole my passion.
I look at it in a different light.

I fell apart a little,
We picked up the pieces.

I wouldn't change it, at all.

My dearest, thank you.
You helped me, more than anything.
I love you.
I am no longer who I once was, if that makes sense. I think I'm going ti start posting again a bit more.
Sunshine Girl Jan 2015
So evil.
So close!!
No!

I don't wanna go today...
Sunshine Girl Nov 2012
High School,
it
doesn't
last
that
long.

High School,
it
begins,
has
little
content
then
ends..

With a long walk
across a short stage,
with a little book in your hands...
Sunshine Girl Jan 2013
A child,
         my child.
With eyes like mine,
         maybe hair too.
A sweet little thing,
         whether boy or girl.
Half me,
          half you too!
They’d be darling.
Sunshine Girl Nov 2012
Even though you're not gone.
                      I've already lost you.
Even though you're not here,
                      you're in my heart.
Even though I love you so,
                      my hatred grows.
Even though you're dying,
                       in my heart you're still,
                                        Alive,
           ­                             Striving,
                          ­              Living,
                                        Sur­viving,
                                        Thriving.
Sunshine Girl Nov 2012
One Night.
While dreaming,
I met a boy.

Face of an angel.
Voice of one too!
Twas' just a dream though.

One Day.
While awake,
I met a boy.

Face of a demon.
Voice of one too!
It wasn't a dream though.

One Night.
While dreaming,
The demon boy appeared.

His demon face melted away.
His voice became angelic.
Was this real?

One Day.
While awake.
I met the demon boy, again.

I looked into his eyes.
The demon disappeared!
*He became My angel.
Sunshine Girl Dec 2020
My darling,
you came out of nowhere,
but you were always there.
You helped me,
you saved me.

My dearest,
you've made me stronger.
My Kamori, I love you with all of my heart and I'm so happy that I have you. - Kiu
Sunshine Girl Mar 2013
A year has passed,
one year without your smile.

Three hundred and sixty-five days,
of not hearing your simple laugh.

Too long Bre,
too young to be taken from us.

I miss you, your smiles and laughs,
your sayings and our jokes,
but most of all,
*I miss you
Rest in peace Breanna Kay (I know cliché, but you know me.)
Sunshine Girl Dec 2014
Big sister,
You smell like coffee....
but I showered twice!!
Sunshine Girl Nov 2012
Don't worry, Be happy.*

That's the saying.

Why can't I just live by it?

Everything Sounds better that way.

But why, why?

Why can't I just live by those simple words?
Sunshine Girl Nov 2012
Each person that enters my life, gets a box.
Some have their own ,
But most have to share.

The people that touch my heart for just a moment,
They all go  together.

Those people that change my life,
Only if, it's a big impact get their own.
The ones that are my true friends,
Not the sometimes ones,
They each get a box to themselves.

When I meet someone again,
I pull their box off the shelf.
In that moment I live in it,
I remember the good and bad,
I live with those memories playing in my head.

Few have their own boxes in my life,
Those few have huge boxes though.
My sisters, the chosen ones, each have their boxes.
They do share with each other when we're all together,
But they don't seem to mind.

My family, though I love them,
mostly fit into one box.
But it is no small box,
And by no means is it empty.
That box is bursting at the seams!

I love the boxes I have,
I cherish each one.


I'll love them until my day of death.
On that day,
*I'll revel in the memories as I watch them burn,
While I float up to heaven.
Sunshine Girl Feb 2013
Just one,
it won't hurt.
Just one beer,
no harm no foul.
Just one,
it won't hurt.
Just one smoke,
one little spiff.
Just one,
it won't hurt.
Just one rule,
one little rule broken.
Having a lo g dang week.. And it's only Tuesday! I need a good strong drink, and a smoke. I won't break too many on my rules.... I swear :D
Sunshine Girl Mar 2013
Buried deep in the dark,
under piles of memories,
you'll find the love I felt.

Hidden way back in a corner,
behind boxes of forgotten things,
you'll find the pieces you left.

Tucked away under the bed,
beneath the dust of my tears,
you'll find what was lost.

Right in front of you,
on the bench just a few yards away,
you'll find the smile that you
*tried to take away
Sunshine Girl Nov 2012
Butterflies?
I still get Butterflies?
My phone goes off, Butterflies.
I open Hello Poetry, Butterflies.
Read your texts, Butterflies.
Hadn't thought I could still get them, Butterflies.
I thank you for bringing back my,
Butterflies.
Dedicated to someone that truly gives me butterflies, he knows who he is :)
Sunshine Girl Jul 2020
Everyday brings new choices,
Decisions that I must make.

Life's been kind of spinning,
Looking to see where it will break.

Being just one person,
One body,
It's been hard.
We've been through alot.
No one knows what those things are.

The ones that do,
We hold close to our hearts.

The hardest decision?
That they're not worth the pain.
That they don't care about the pain,
The pain they've caused.
They don't even know that it exists.
One day they will.
And we don't have to be there.
Sunshine Girl Jun 2013
Silly songs,
Pink dresses,
Bows to match.
Pageant after pageant,
Class after class.
Perfect hair,
Tease it big.
Painted faces,
Plastic dolls.
Dress them up,
Show them off,
Put them away.
In the end,
get a sash,
a crown,
a trophy.
Leave in tears,
sad faces,
Don't let the judges see.
Go home,
Prepare again,
new dresses,
bows to match.
Replay until you win...
There are pageants called Cinderella Pageants, I won Miss Photogenic in my division years ago. This is the best way to describe these shows... To describe the dolls that these mothers make their little girls into.
Sunshine Girl Feb 2013
I've spoken,
about my boxes,
my memories,
my friends.

Each one,
they're different,
none the same.

While cleaning,
I began opening boxes,
taking a peek at the ones I haven't seen in awhile,
as I was looking again,
I began re-sorting.

High school friends,
from middle school friends,
from elementary friends,
then true friends from fake,
slowly my shelves started to clear.

I didn't throw any out,
just re packaged.
Added new labels,
moved them around.

They're all still around,
just in new places.

*I've changed my priorities,
adjusted my life,
made it better for me
Sunshine Girl Nov 2012
I
pour
my
heart
and
all
I
get
is
a
Really?

I
Love
You
,
but
you
really
are
clueless.
Sunshine Girl Dec 2012
Dearest daddy,
Oh how I mis you!
I miss your hugs,
kisses,
our secrets.

Daddy dearest,
I miss being just
your baby girl.

I'm something more,
someone older.

Your kisses can't
make the hurt vanish,
mommy's cannot either.

Your hugs don't
make me forget,
mom's either!

Daddy,
Oh dearest daddy.

I love you.
I miss you like crazy.
Just to let you know, my dad's not dead or something..
Sunshine Girl May 2013
Kiss me,
hold me,
touch me.

No dear,
I don't want ***.

Just hold me,
touch me,
kiss me.

No dear,
make the scary things go away.
Sunshine Girl Jun 2014
I feel as if i have left behind my passions.
Dropped them at the door.
This house makes me forget my plans,
Our plans.

I've got no clue why.
They all just run away.
When you make me forget, it's different.
It's needed.

The days just blur together while trapped.
This house, is not a home.
I, as mother pointed out, just sleep here.
Tis' not where I belong.

One day, we'll leave this place.
You'll save me from my tear filled nights.
She won't be there whispering doubt into my ear.
Just ask silly, I'll say yes.
Sunshine Girl Nov 2012
I need you, but do you need me?
I want you, but do you truly want me?
I see you, but do you honestly see me?
I love you, but do you really love me?

I didn't think so.
Sunshine Girl Feb 2014
Long dirt roads,
Old red trucks.
Put the two together,
you get magic.
Sunshine Girl Dec 2019
Overpower me.
Make me scream.
I want pain.

This body is yours.
Do what you wish.

No,
I promise.
I didn't mean to.
You're in charge,
I just,
.
.
.
I think I'm gonna go a little darker here and there hehe..
Sunshine Girl Feb 2020
Do you know that I'm hurting?
Do you know that I'm in pain?
Do you know that I wish I could just leave and never come back?

They say you do.. but it's not like you show it.

Some may say that it's my fault, that I'm the problem.
But I don't think that's the case.
Just speak to me.
Just tell me what you need.

I've explained myself over and over.
You know what's wrong.
You know what I need.
Just listen for once.
I need communication.
I need help.
Sunshine Girl Dec 2019
Drip

Drip, drip

Drip

ting

Drip, drip

Sitting here
Watchin the rain fall
One drop at a time
So calm and peaceful.
Wish everyday could be like today.
Sunshine Girl Sep 2021
Spiralling

Lost

Dissociated

Ribbons..
that's all I want to do..
just want to carve myself into ribbons and go away.. I feel that if I was gone that everything would be okay.. if I didn't exist that
Sunshine Girl Jan 2014
Have you ever,
fallen so hard,
that getting up seems
impossible?
The day I met you,
that's what happened.
If you'd stopped,
walked away,
I'm not sure how,
but I would have fallen apart.
When you find the one,
you should never let them go!
*I'm happy you're my one
I love you with all of my heart!!
Sunshine Girl Nov 2012
Pounding heart.
Sweating palms.
Nervous shaking.

Racing thoughts.
Mixed up words
Confusing actions.

Thoughts of you.
Smiling at your picture.
My conclusion.
*I like you.
Sunshine Girl Nov 2012
No one can really tell,
      Where friendship ends and sisterhood begins.
No one really knows,
      How some friendships begin.
Not many understand,
      The reasoning behind the dynamic.

Fate brings them together.
      Just like us.
dedicated to my best friends Dannie and Alexa!
Sunshine Girl Nov 2012
Wide awake.
Though it's morning,
When I should be awake,
I don't have you.
You're not awake to talk to me.
You're alseep.
While I'm wide awake.
Sunshine Girl Nov 2012
Somewhere,
        unseen by prying eyes,
There's a blade,
        the one that almost ended my life.
That simple razor,
        it hides from prying eyes,
               It hides from your eyes.
Because of that blade,
       I have felt pain,
               the blood draining.
That blade was once,
        my only friend.
Sunshine Girl Dec 2020
I've moved away, yet you still have hold of me.
I've left you behind, but you've sunk your claws into me.
No matter what you always find some way to burrow back into my thoughts.
******* though.
I am my own person.
Sunshine Girl Nov 2012
Left.
Right.
Left.
Right.
How to get through the day.

Breathe In.
Out.
In.
Out
How to make it through
            those moments.

Look forward.
Forward.
Forward.
Forward.
Never look back at what
           you thought you wanted
Sunshine Girl Nov 2012
One that includes the simple things.
One that shows the little things I want.
One that tells the world who I am.
One that says that I'm not normal.

In my dreams,
I spend hours wrapped in you,
wrapped in your words.

In those dreams,
I lay for hours talking to you,
lost in your arms.
Sunshine Girl Jul 2014
Since I spilled my guts!
Since I opened up!!
Since I told you my life story!

Hi there :)
Sunshine Girl Dec 2019
That's all I need.
One minute.
You don't have to speak.
Just listen?

I
Miss
You.
I know,
It's my fault.
Maggie, I miss you and I can't fix what happened. I doubt you'd listen. But I am sorry.
Sunshine Girl Aug 2014
I've realized that one year ago I met my love,
it didn't start out as love though.
On the first of August last year, I found someone,
someone on Okcupid.com.
Why was I on a dating site, you ask?
That, my dear friends, is a whole different story!
My love- my Suikui- and I were matched,
we started talking around this time last year.
I fell in love sometime in September,
or rather we said it.
I'm certain that I fell not long after we met.

*I love you Suikui
I'm happy I've know them for a year.
The only downside is they're not a barista anymore :'(
Sunshine Girl Mar 2014
Little girl, little girl.
Why do you cry so?
Small child, small child.
Those tears should cease to flow.
Kind sir, kind sir.
Why do you question me so?
Tall sir, tall sir.
If you must know, I'm missing someone dear.
Tis' all you need to know.
Sunshine Girl Mar 2013
Burning,
Aching,
Tearing.
You can almost hear it.

The deceit,
The torture,
The truth.
*I loved you, but you left.
Recently began to feel the pain of losing someone. No she didn't die, we just fell apart. Best friends should call each other, and not replace each other when they're gone for just a small while. Dearest, I miss you. But my heart cannot take it anymore, it feels as if you tore it out and stomped it into the ground. If only you would read this.
Sunshine Girl Jul 2013
It can be found in many ways,
by searching,
by falling,
sometimes by tripping.
It can be lost too.

I thought I loved you,
thought you felt the same.
Then you left,
just disappeared.
tore me in two.
I fell for you, every word, every poem. But you obviously didn't feel the same. You just up and left.
Sunshine Girl Nov 2012
I'm scared,
I'm afraid,
I'm confused,
I just don't know why.

It's weird,
It's strange,
It's odd,
No, I think that I'm just
*Afraid to fall in love.
Me.
Sunshine Girl Apr 2014
Me.
Some joys are unknown,
most sadness' also.
My joy is silly,
my sadness is deep.

Our love is strong,
but the tears are bitter.
It honestly doesn't mean anything of worth :P
Sunshine Girl Feb 2013
Nights.
Nights like these.
Nights like these when I miss you.

Days.
Days like these.
Days like these when I feel you close.

Mornings.
Mornings like these.
Mornings like these when I long to be in your arms.

*It's times like these that I love you so
Sunshine Girl Nov 2014
... They feel so short.
I feel as if time is passing me up!
... It's running away! I just know it..
from me, the explosion waiting to happen.
Sunshine Girl Nov 2012
You are far,
    But my dear,
       Think of me?

You are near,
    But my dear,
        Don't forget me?

You are gone,
    But my dear,
        You're still here.
Sunshine Girl Feb 2013
I know you are hurting.
I understand.
He's broken you, hurt you.
I understand.

But realize, this isn't the end.
You understand?
It's only the beginning.
You understand?
Tis' the beginning of a new chapter.
Dannie, I know it hurts right now. But you'll heal in time, I know it. You're strong enough to make through, and start writing this new chapter on your life. I love you my dear <3
Sunshine Girl Nov 2012
No one knows why,
Why I love you,
Listen to your lies,
What I see in your eyes.

Not one person understands,
Why I listen to you,
What that look means,
How I fell.

But I do,
When I look into your eyes,
       I see my future.
When I listen to your voice,
       I hear my future
When I feel your touch,
       I know your arms are where I belong.

For now,
and forever.
I love you, always have always will.. Never giving up.
Sunshine Girl Nov 2012
My heart stays hidden,
       I don't know where,
       I just know it's hidden.
It hides from my eyes,
        in a box,
        maybe on a shelf.
Wherever I hid it last,
        there it lies.
Sunshine Girl Aug 2013
How does it feel?
To know that my smile isn't yours.
What's it like?
Knowing that your pain didn't last.
Why are you here?
Trying to fix something that isn't broken.

My dear, you had your chance.
Now this smile,
My smile,
It's not for you.
Hehe.. Finally growing, relationships can be hard. I'm happy I survived this one with very few tears!
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