in the circus with the clowns
in the bins with the trash
in the clubs seeking flesh
in the streets dying slowly

they say good men don't exist
truth is, we exist within plain sight
often overlooked due to preferences
that only lead to broken hearts

questions of our existence have no answer
we appear where eyes don't look
but when least expected
once our presence is felt, it's magical

pain is a drug
& most of us can't get enough

falling for errors
while loving those we don't trust

red flags ignored
true intentions come to light

feelings get hurt
hearts are never taken in consideration

pain is a drug
some of us can never get enough

in silence where we reside

smiling with pain inside

guilty for following intuition

our blessing as well as our downfall

the cons of having a huge heart

As a man, I’m not ashamed to admit that I cry sometimes in the dark where I can’t be seen to anyone else who may not understand the concept behind my pains rainfall or the aftermath of the destruction from my damaged heart

Almost everyday, I question my stance as a man looking for any errors that may need correcting or any part of my spirit that maybe in need of improvements

Sometimes, I feel weak for being so emotional about what I feel or passionate about sharing love with another soul that needs me

Overall, I feel I am amazing but fall short on qualities needed to attract certain eyes that see through my false happiness & see the treasure that’s tucked away behind this pure heart of mine

Intimate conversations turn
Associates to close acquaintances.
talks about life & past experiences
that turn a heart cold that built
walls up to be the guardian against
the bad vibes that come around
with the intentions of harm

Over time, this pain births the doubts of happiness
& everything that’s attached to it
but we keep search in hopes of falling in love
only to fall victim & eventually look stupid

I’ve seen the potential in a few
out of the many I’ve chose to entertain
but they’re nothing more than lessons
of the game with the goal to destroy
you from within letting it be known you’re the problem

We can only bring true peace to ourselves
& only wish to addon to another one’s
peace if it indeed exists above the pain
that’s already established from the tragedies of the wrong love

I accept that I’ll never understand the pain, sacrifice, & patience
the sadness, the drive, or the strength to keep going
whether it’s the gift of life or the damage of a toxic love
without the fathers’ help but she manages to be all she can be
I feel it’s my duty to appreciate the magic in her presence
the endless crying tears, the endless sleepless nights
the feeling of being let down yet she still hangs on to her crown
I pray to the powers above that her heart is one day admired
her wounded existence & her will to never give up
is such a beautiful thing to witness
the pain or the beautiful madness of this Woman’s Work

found freedom within the cage

found relief within the rage

born again in the worst way

the old me I tried to save

found peace within the madness

poetic with razors using my skin as a canvas

in the mirror, I no longer see me

but the monster that became me