I cannot say I don't miss you  
in hushed tones of violet  
I cannot say I don't miss your  
rapid hands that wrapped  
around my fragile neck  
I cannot say I don't miss  
Your yellow mark bruises  
That washed against my skin
I cannot say I don't miss the  
violence that escaped your mouth
and found your way to your fists  
that brushed against my skin
on my legs, on my arms
on my face it found its place
Everywhere on my fragile body
that consisted of the words  
“she belongs to me”
I do not miss the hits that  
found their way to my once  
Unscratched face  
but somehow, I let you into  
my fragile life and you made  
a bruise out of me

yes I'm a mess
im the cluttered drawer
in your tiny kitchen
that you only pull out
once when you've misplaced
an item of great need
but I'm blessed to be
a mess only meant for you