IwishIcouldhugthemallofthepeoplewhoeverhadtofeelthisawfulawfulfee­lingoflonelinessandunwillingnesstomoveortalkoropentheireyes Iwanttotellthemthatit'sokaythey'reokaythey'renotalonetheyaren'tth­eonlypersonhavingapanicattackinthebathroomtheyweren'tthe onlyoneswhofeelthisbadandIwanttoheartheir storiesandIwantthemtohearmineIwishwecouldallgotoafarawaylandawayf­arfromtheruinersoflivesandthethingsthatmakeyouwanttocommitsuicide­Iwanttotellthemthey'renottheonlyoneswhofeelthekeyboardintheirmind­isglitchingmakingnopunctuationorspaceforabreakfromthought

I'm in the dark
With no light
You actions left a mark
And now im stuck in the endless night

You mocked me
With your torch
I touched the flame
So now my skin is scorched

Youve left me with scars
Beneath the surface
Physical and mental
Geez. Thanks so much for your service.

I am not
Emo
I am
Depressed
There is
And always will be
A difference

On my first day in hell
The teacher gave to me
a bunch Of homework

One my second day in hell
The teacher have to me
2 failing grades
And a bunch of homework

On my third day in hell
My teacher gave to me
3 fake friends
2 failing grades
And a bunch of homework

On my fourth day in hell
My teacher gave to me
4 pop quizzes
3 fake friends
2 failing grades
And a bunch of homework

On my fifth day in hell
My teacher gave to me
5 transphobic comments
4 pop quizzes
3 fake friends
2 failing grades
And a bunch of homework

On my sixth day in hell
My teacher gave to me
6 pages of work
5 transphobic comments
4 pop quizzes
3 fake friends
2 failing grades
And a bunch of homework
Halfway done!

On my seventh day in hell
My teacher gave to me
7 broken promises
6  pages of work
5 transphobic comments
4 pop quizzes
3 fake friends
2 failing grades
And a bunch of homework

On my eighth day in hell
My teacher gave to me
8 late assignments
7 broken promises
6  pages of work
5 transphobic comments
4 pop quizzes
3 fake friends
2 failing grades
And a bunch of homework

On my ninth day in hell
My teacher gave to me
9 useless lessons
8 late assignments
7 broken promises
6  pages of work
5 transphobic comments
4 pop quizzes
3 fake friends
2 failing grades
And a bunch of homework

On my tenth day in hell
My teacher gave to me
10 rules
9 useless lessons
8 late assignments
7 broken promises
6  pages of work
5 transphobic comments
4 pop quizzes
3 fake friends
2 failing grades
And a bunch of homework

On my eleventh day in hell
My teacher gave to me
11 books to read
10 rules
9 useless lessons
8 late assignments
7 broken promises
6  pages of work
5 transphobic comments
4 pop quizzes
3 fake friends
2 failing grades
And a bunch of homework

On my 12 (final) day in hell
My teacher gave to me
12 year-olds to manage
11 books to read
10 rules
9 useless lessons
8 late assignments
7 broken promises
6  pages of work
5 transphobic comments
4 pop quizzes
3 fake friends
2 failing grades
And a bunch of homework

And now, to repeat it all again

the funny thing about screaming
is that you can do it silently
you can cry for help
just by making eye contact in a certain way
not everybody will notice
but the people
screaming
crying
and clawing at the asylum walls
just like you
will understand
and feel
your pain
i know i do.

i think i'm drowning
because i can't breathe
weights tied to my feet
making me sink
sink
sink
deeper into the unknown

i think i'm drowning
because i need a way to stay afloat
no way to breathe
pressure
pressure
surrounding me

i think i'm drowning
because i feel wet sand
beneath my toes
it's all dark
pitch black
all alone
my ears are popping

i think i'm drowning
because i am being choked
by the weight
of all my burdens
my
burdens
i
am
a
burden

i think i'm drowning
because i've reached rock bottom
i'm in the deep end
of the ocean
but nobody cares

i think i'm drowning
but i don't really care
at all
anymore...

DISCLAIMER: in this poem, i do not intend to harm or offend any religious folks!

i was raised atheist
so i never believed in god
once
when i was in kindergarten
a kid asked me
do you believe in god?
he asked everyone.
i said no
i was the only one
and he hurt me
he punched me
pinched me
kicked me
and called me a sinner

i keep getting hate
for how i was raised
in the 5th grade
i tried to start believing
but i couldn't
i respect others views
but i don't share them
and i don't think i ever will
i know a little about discrimination,
as a trans
queer
mentally ill
annoying kid
but i think others know more

religion is a silly little thing
for some people
it's their whole personality
because they love it
and for others
it is a weight on their chest and leaves them with trauma

i respect your beliefs as long as you don't force them onto me