What do I wonder
What do I see
What do I stutter
What do I breath.

I though I knew so
But I did not
Ordinariness
Every day is the same.

I spill over my skin
An over-emotional mess
I am a puddle
You are a stone
I feel so much
That I overload and forget how to feel
But you are a stone
I don’t know if you’re sad
You wouldn’t tell me if you could.

Smiles are my glory,
Smiles are my friend.
But only when they’re real,
Real real real smiles.
But not when they hurt,
Forced to grin wide.
Happiness should not be forced.
It can’t be forced.

Smile.
Smile real.
Please.

Rain is interesting.
It seems to evoke
More feelings than-
I don’t know, something that kinda pokes
You, and prods too,
Because the uncomforted
Think the less, feel the more,
Which leads to ideas galore.

Rain really is very interesting
Rain can make a person sing.
It can make the same person cry
Or scream
Or shout
Or whimper
Or sigh.

Rain is an interesting creature to witness-
Holds feelings of anger, sadness, and success.

If I was the wind
I’d blow away
To a place so magical
I’d always want to stay.

If I was a fire
I’d warm you to your bones
I’d be light
You’d never be lost.

If I was the waves
I’d give
And take
And give
I’d find treasures
And lose them
So you could find them too.

If I was the Earth
I would nurture all that grew
Along my edges
Because the small things
Are important too.

It’s unfortunate
That you cannot understand
What has disfigured
This kindred spirit of yours.

I am not content
Because you won’t accept me
And you are unsheathing a
Poison licked sword of hate.

It’s hard to see green grass
When it’s snowing.

It’s hard to see the positive
When you are positive
The world is going to heck.

It’s really dang hard
To see the sun
On a foggy day.

But you dang well know
I will try anyway.

My life
Is a plane
On downward trajectory.
I’m going somewhere
Down there.
I don’t wanna crash&burn.
But right now,
I’m crash&burningout.
Help me
Because I don’t think
I can pull up
In time.

I’m lost in the woods
No one can save me now
I’m running from the good
I’ve been shown because I know
I don’t deserve what I’ve been given.

My road is decorated with thorns
Roses die at my feet
I’m a demon-I’ve got horns
I welcome you to be in the front seat
Of the tragedy called “My Life”.

But then again, it isn’t too bad
As much as it seems to be
There’s so much life left to be had
And I can grow from this like a tree.

Yes, I might be lost in the woods
But I know you’re looking for me
I can find good if I know where to look
And I’m not as lost as I think.

If you are lost
You will be found.

You’re not any better than me
Just like the land’s not worse than the sea
We have different strengths
But that does not make
You any worse or better than me.

I wish I could believe the things I told you.

I see dark grey rain clouds above me
Right next to me
Is bright blue skies with
Puffy white clouds

So near
Yet so far away.

Isn’t exercise supposed to make you feel better about yourself?
I must be doing something wrong, then.

Riding the wave
Is all fun and games
Until the wave knocks you down
And under the water you drown.

You smile when it rains,
You laugh when the skies turn grey,
When life gives you lemons,
You **** on them.

When the clouds clear up,
And the skies turn blue,
It doesn’t matter to me,
Because I’m with you.
I’m with you.

Have you ever felt
Super super strong
And then suddenly something
Comes and knocks you down.

But instead of laying there
Like a beached whale
You get back up
And you seek revenge.

But you don’t topple that something
That brought you to your knees
But you instead stand taller than ever.
You become so successful,
It’s like saying, “Your efforts meant nothing!”
To the thing that pushed you back.

You surged forward.
You are a Force to be reckoned with.

One I start I cannot stop
So much to be said
All stuffed in my head
Thoughts creep shyly out
They soon get comfortable and run about
There’s not enough room on this page
To fit the thoughts that live in my brain-cage
So I won’t try.

The wind blows through me
As easily as it blows through the trees.

Maybe
I am exactly how I feel
Full of holes.

Normal people have toothbrushes
I have words
To clean off all my gunk.

You keep on telling me to be honest.
I am honest.
But you don’t like my truth.
So you deny it.
You deny me.
You deny with all of your “honesty”.

Meet Expectations.
She is bubbly and happy
Sensitive and sappy
And she lives all in her own world.

Problems are like flies to her:
Pesky annoyances
She’d rather ignore.

Expectations is fun to hang around sometimes
Until her ideals start to
Weigh you down sometimes.

I feel sad
I think
I shouldn’t feel sad
I list my blessings
I think of all the kids
Out there who don’t
Have a good family
Or a house
Or nice clothes.

I cry.
The guilt makes me cry more.

You are not lost
Until you believe all is lost.

Sun tell me why
I can’t see the light
In all you illuminate
The darkness shining through.

Moon tell me why
I can’t find the peace
That you glow with every night
Cutting a hole in the blackness.

Stars tell me why
I haven’t found my lucky one yet
Tell me why
Your sparkle seems to evade my eyes
Your glimmer shining dull
Next to the missing piece of me.

Problems cannot be cured
If the blind is those who assure.

If ignorance prevails
Humanity will undoubtedly fail.

But who will save us now
When nobody on Earth knows how?

How will we save humanity
When nobody can see?

Who will teach the youth how to live
When you don’t even know how to thrive?

I’m a mess.
I’m not graceful
I lack finesse.
I look at everyone around me
And they seem to have it so easy.

I’ve been told that I make things harder
Than they actually need to be,
But it seems the harder I work the farther
My needs and dreams seem to flee.

I look around, convinced I’m insane
Until I met you
Just as insane as my messed up brain
And when you speak
Butterflies flit out
And I can tell you’re just like me
Not graceful
Lacking finesse
Clumsy in talk and everything else.

What a relief
To know I am not alone.
Sometimes
I just feel so alone.
But I’m not alone
Just lonely perhaps,
But then I met you
Who reminded me
I wasn’t an alien
I wasn’t alone
And I needn’t not be lonely
Much longer.

Rise
I ask
I plead
You to rise.
Please
Don’t stay
There on the ground.
You
Deserve happiness
But you won’t
Accept it.
Rise
Love
Give.

f l o a t

We pity the disabled
Thinking we are so much better
All the while we labor
Trying not to see the horror
Of our own trying to grow
Trying to avoid the slaughter
Getting knocked down by all those
People pretending they are stronger.

We grow up blind thinking
The world is full of happy strangers
Where problems don’t exist
And we are saved from all the danger.
What we don’t know is that
Sometimes people **** for glory.
We didn’t know we’d combat
Our own villains in our story.

I used to not be scared of heights
That was before I fell
Now all I want to do
Is stay safely on the ground.

I can’t believe how boring I’ve gotten.

I worry people will begin to see me one day.
Yet at the same time, I want people to see me.
I want them to acknowledge my existence.
But I fear they will know why I exist.
How I exist.
I fear I will be condemned to a hell of confusion.
But I am not confused.
They will be when they see me.
They don’t understand me.

Nothing good happens to those who aren’t understood.

Sunshine and butterflies
Don’t live in this world of mine
I never new how to not fail
I think I’ll just stop trying

She would like to feel something again
She thinks she deserves the pain
She thinks she is a living sin
And that it is not worth living.

She is wrong.

Music is when
Your bones vibrate
With the happiness
Of listening.
Or something less dramatic,
But still similar.
It’s when
You get goosebumps,
Or you can’t help yourself
But hum along.
Or at the very least,
It’s listen-able.

So “The Box”
By Roddy Ricch
Can just
Go die.
No offense
To all of his fans
And Roddy too.
Just my opinion.

Trying to put labels on things
Is extremely exhausting.
Everything is just too many things
To characterize.
But that’s okay
I’m gonna try and put labels
On myself anyway.

I feel like
I could be characterized as a waterfall.
For example,
When I write one poem on HePo
It takes me about 15 minutes to finally
Shut up.

If
You are dear to the heart of a poet
Get ready for intense affection
But he/she may or may not show it.

If
You are hated by the heart of a poet
Get ready for intense anger
For he/she will definitely show it.

For us poets
Feel things so much
Such as anger
Or a lovers touch.

I was kind of unsure
But not anymore!

Over and over and over again,
You look at me like I’m your friend.
You knock, and I let you in.
Over and over and over again.

Never, ever, ever again.
Will I ever let you in.
I don’t trust anyone anymore.
But at least I’m courteous enough to pretend I do.

You look at me like you’re nervous.
You ask me why I was staring at you.
I pretend I wasn’t.
I tell you I was reading the poster behind you.
You look away.
Memories of you come back.
I don’t know if I love you again.
Do I want to?
Do you?
Please do.
Ugh.
What am I doing.

Get lost in the music
Get lost in the words
Look up to the sky
See bright blue birds.

Rose colored glasses
Won’t fix anything
But clear magnifying ones
Will help you see more closely.

Don’t put your shades on
Don’t put your head in the sand
Just because things may be going south
Not everything’s sad and bland.

I’ve been told
“No one expects you to be perfect.”
A lot.
So many times, in fact,
That it has lost it’s meaning.

Because, the thing is:
No one expects me to be perfect
But can you look me in the eye
And tell me
No one expects me
To at least be “okay”?

If the world keeps getting worse
Happiness will go first
Moral compass will go second
The weak will be left to fend
For themselves.

If the world keeps getting better
Your own daughter can change the world, just let her
Wars would never start
There would be less shattered hearts
And more love.

I’m missing something
I never had
How sad
What a tragedy
It’s bad, but she
Never left me
I left her.

A glitch in the system
Who nobody listens
To but they do
She doesn’t know
She’s too busy playing victim.

She doesn’t notice
That others can see
Her turmoil
Her lack of peace.

She feels alone
Cold
A heart weighed by stone.

Help me.

If I could remember
Anything,
I would remember flying
Using golden wings,
My memories
Aren’t worth the while,
I spend my days
Imagining imaginary smiles.

Do you know
Where the wishes go
When the wishes are wished away?

Do you know
Where the hope goes
When sadness and pain
Drives it away?

Do you know
Where the knowledge goes
When people don’t want to hear it?

They go to the minds of the poets
So we might return it back
To the very people
Who banished it to the dark waters
Of hurt.

Fazed
In a haze
Lost in a maze
Keep on praising
The ones who are crazy.

If I never ever met you
I’d still miss what I never had.
It’s like longing for the heavens
And the rest of outer space.

I’ll probably never meet you,
I don’t even know who you are.
But I know I want someone just like you,
Someone bright, like a star.

Or maybe I don’t care how bright you are,
I just want someone who respects
My wishes, my fears, my unrequited beliefs.
Someone who loves my smiles, and tears.

You set me free
Inspire me
Inspire epiphanies
Inspire word and deed.

You never fail to make me cry
Though I could never say goodbye
To you as you also give me highs
Make me feel like I floated up into the sky.

I will never let you go
You will never be my foe
Oh, how I love you so!
For you never give me true woe.

Bet you didn’t know
I was talking ‘bout books, yo!

Take a selfie every day,
Try to hide emotions away,
Tell everyone about your “perfect life”
That’s actually full of pain and strife.