You came knowingly
Fauqed up intentionally
Disregarding my life
My hopes, my dreams
My responsibilities
Running from
What your hands created
Hiding out in my peace
Ignorance begat
Ignorant choices
Xoul eating ultimatum
Distorted views
Aborted no mission
Leaving behind
No man, child, or woman
Massacres for thanksgivings
Your ladened basket
Came filled with lovely lies...

A pig with wings
A horn you play with strings
A unicorn with a mermaid's tail
While megladonic sirens sing
Differ from the human mind
Is imagining the existence
Of these things.
Imagination is great
When turning nine
Since now I'm only eight...

Remember the day
You asked me
Who would want me now?
Was about 6 months pregnant
With our gorgeous oldest
On bed rest getting big as hell
Feeling alone, lonely and very ugly
So sad, cause that was just
5 weeks after we got married
Since then constant
Verbal abuse, made me
Regret the very air you breathe
You set out on a journey
To try hard to destroy me
Good luck with that
I pray your best existence
Despite the hellish demise
You wish for me...

Internal mental reigns
Attempt to pull me in
The burning furnace
Of doubtful, angry fearful
Self hatred flames
Consuming thoughts causing
Imploding inevitable
Destruction of my faith
Only if allowed
These mind conscious
Choices chosen to make...

Misery loving the company
Of my soul is overrated
Can't remember the last time
My heart's song
Had my feet tapping
Or my spirit elated
Mourning more familiar
Lately than ever before
Regrettably reopening
To heartache's knocking?
Not this morning old friend
Try another broken door...

I beat up on myself
Far too much
Blackened blues
Blews and black
Like ***
Somedays ***
I'm muthafauqin
Team far too much...