What have I become, my sweetest friend / everyone I know goes away in the end

Everywhere I look someone dies / wonder when it’s my turn

look inside myself and see my heart is black / I see my red door and must have it painted black / maybe then I’ll fade away and not have to face the facts / it’s not easy facing up when your whole world is black

Another six months, I’ll be unknown / give all my things to all my friends / you’ll never step foot in my room again / you’ll close it off, board it up

I am a prisoner, locked up behind Xanax bars / I have just boarded a plane without a pilot

When you hugged me when I departed (dear mom)

You sent me with God's peace and called me your son.

From where did he come in the path of God's peace?

He came (dear mom) as near as (my forehead) where you kissed me mom

I'm from a nation whose children frighten him

Some enemy he is,  he who targets children

I've had to go but my brother is here now

My brother will now study all that I couldn't

My father is also here, how far can you go?

This is now a promise that you'll never be able to come here again.

I'm from a nation whose children frighten him

Some enemy he is, he who targets children.

I try to stay positive, but all the negative ****
Is surrounding me, and I can't handle it
It's really pathetic and I immediately regret it
There I said it and I meant it
This rap thing turns me into a menace
I hate it but still, I try to defend it
I try to paint a picture and a message
For you, so you can understand the hell I'm in
The more pain that I'm telling
It feels like nobody's listening
That's why I'm stuck in the kitchen
Sinking in all the drinks that I drink
And I start to think that my drinking
Is a problem for me, can someone solve it for me
I'm probably gonna die from it
Why wouldn't I, I know I'm an alcoholic
I empty my wallet on it, got so many flaws
Do not like this at all, who the **** can I call
'Cause I'm depressed