I am glad
you are the one
who ended up
knowing me
the best

And then
the words all got muddled
meshed into a life
deeply troubled
we became unsettled
slightly unfettled
like untamed horses
running wild
manes to the wind
galloping
uncontrollably
terribly and unknowingly
into gale force winds

tears are just water
and we all need water
to live.

I was asleep
and then you shook me
awoken me
into life

Let us be quiet now
for a minute
Soften our minds
and our souls
Let us be blind now
for a minute
cherish our hearts
and our foes

Do not whisper
Speak your truth out loud
Do not be silenced
By the crowd

If I could choose
a dazzlingly bright everyday sun
I would choose you
my dazzlingly bright everyday
April son

Don’t fall asleep on me
I know you are tired
as am I
But please
don’t fall asleep on me
not now
If you do
I fear
we might never
ever
ever
wake up again.

I wish you had arrived
when I still believed in love
I wish I had met you
when there was still
space in my heart
I wish I had heard your song
when I still believed in melody

I hear you
I am not listening
yet somehow
within the silence
I hear you.
still,

These might be the moments
we might try
to remember
the days we fight hard
not to fade
the smiles we are are glad
that we gave
freely
the moments that remind us
we were once
too young
too giddy
too brave.

There is nothing but
the outside of me
left
this face
this skin
the inside of me
has slowly begun to
wither
from within.

There is a newness about today
and I welcome it without delay
a brand new sun
of a brand new year
I will hear no bad of it
I will believe in it
I will welcome it
I will savour it
I will believe in it
no matter what
you say
I will believe in it
Today

Hush now
Let’s be still
let the dark navy blue majestic sky
quieten  your cry

You flit lightly
through your life
yet fall heavily
on mine

I buried my father
although no one claimed the ****
I buried my father
with my brother, my sister
my mother dressed to ****
I buried my father
we haven’t bothered
with the will

Is it just me or
are we almost
on the brink of
honesty?

Someone once told me
a poem should be long
rhythm and thyme
and take a long time
so love and regret
pain and explain
delete and blame
repeat and destain
let go and restrain
sunsets and more
two people or four
fall down then soar
sweetness and gore
does this really say more
than
I love you
whatever the score!

My eyes can’t quite see you
my ears struggle to hear you
my arms can’t quite reach you
my lips cannot speak to you
my heart can’t quite love you
my sister never quite liked you.

I caught you yesterday
when you didn’t realise you were falling
you walked just a step too far
and didn’t hear me calling
but no worries
I caught you
anyway.

The postman delivered
your letter
It’s just two hundred years
too late
and two hundred words
out of date

I used to think
that when life got old
it would somehow get vague
yet I see more clearly now
than when I was sixteen

I hear you
thanks
I hear loudly
thanks
I just choose
not to dance
your dance
while the army of
injustice
make their first
honestly heard
advance

There is nothing I would rather do
right now
than sit right down
beside you
there is nothing than I shouldn’t do
right now
than sit
right down
beside you

It was one of those parties
where everyone knew everything
poetry is easy he said
from his over privileged lips
give me a word
and I will give you a poem
really I thought
from the corner of the room
wish I could do that
someone shouted love
love is a sham
he said
who the **** gives a ****
I do I though
from the corner of the room

those who believe in love
take one step to the right
those who are burnt
take one step to the left
those who still believe
stampede straight ahead
headlong
into the middle .

I look in the mirror
and I see you.

I know you think this smile
is just for you
it might well be
but I give out 264 and more smiles each day
multiple by a week
a year
a life
I know you think this smile
is just for you
it might well be
maybe
you just might be right
wouldn’t that be nice.

love
and then a little bit more
love
and then a whole lot more
love
otherwise
what’s the point?

It is dense here
Rummaging around inside your mind
Let’s let a little light in
see what we can find

I used to be you
giddy and careless
brave and cold
outspoken and bold
hold the line
it’s worth the unfold

Love
is not a big enough
word
for this

Let the dust settle
in our heads
let the words
go unsaid
tomorrow
we will meet
again

Do not lie too far away
from me
because lies
like ties
can strangle you

I am looking in your eyes
and smoking  a cigarette
I don’t know which one
is more toxic
you
or the cigarette

We grew up together
you and me
husband and wife
reaching out
for something
beyond strife
beyond  life
beyond  smile
beyond house
beyond kids
beyond ideal
beyond anyone
could ever hope to be
congrats !
we got there
we are now
after this long time  
beyond anyone  
anywhere
in this universe
could ever hope to be
Well done us!
lets not talk about
the price.

I know how much you love the sun
I think you would follow it
anywhere
perhaps you did
and now
your scorched skin
is forever
Tender to my touch

Remember you said
you would rather be dead
than to live a life
without cause
God, how honourable then
I clung to your every word
like a long lost chalice
All I ever wanted to be was
the perfect daughter
perfect friend
perfect person
but you left
without telling me
how.

I will take this love
and I will run with it
as far as it will take me
as high as it will make me
I will take this love
and I will run with it
and I will never look back
for fear
reality will overtake me

You have left fingerprints
that I cannot erase
marks upon my skin
shadows
exposed by truth
memories
celebrated by youth.

There is no one here
but me
what a scary place
to be

Do not try to
dry my tears
they have been weeping
for a hundred years
from my eyes
my mothers eyes
and the eyes of others
long gone
and disappeared

You breathed
only for me
I breathed
only for you
then the oxygen got tight
and we had
to choose.

I give her to you
my love has died
give her everything
I would have
if only I had tried

Don’t be that weird person
we always promised each other
we would never
ever
become .

Don’t say you are leaving
I am already at the door
don’t say you are bleeding
I already hold the sore
don’t say you didn’t mean it
I already know the score
don’t say you are sorry
I already
already
already
I already
love you more

Your love
makes me feel safe
enough to sleep
every night
without
locking
the world out

I will stand up
Scared
Yet standing
Naked
Exposed
Reaching
Yet reclining
I will stand
I will hold you
If you falter
I will stand up
Scared
Yet standing
Will you?

Remember you said
you would rather be dead
than to live a life without cause
God, how honourable then
I thought you were my saviour
and I drank your presence
like the sweetest wine
I clung to your every word
like a long lost disciple
All I ever wanted to be was
the perfect daughter
perfect friend
perfect girl
but you left
without teaching me
how to be just like you

I am closed
after being
open all hours
24/7
for twenty years
and more
I am closed
now
Permanently