Look at these scars
and still say you don’t care
look at these scars
openly
honestly
No, you won’t find them
there
not on my face
or my arm
or in my embrace
look at these scars
and still say
you don’t care

A love is for life
not just
for Valentine’s Day !

talk me gently
into tomorrow
make today
a vague memory

When did those little boy arms
that ran to me
full of joy and laughter
and wild abandon
straight into my arms
unquestionable love
when did those little boy arms become
strong enough to hold me
and save me?

Life drips pain
until someone says
no more
enough
will that be me
or you

I know what you mean
I know what you are saying
I am not crazy
I am not insane
I just
honestly
don’t think
the same.

If I had two thousand words
with which to describe you
I would ask for two hundred
to lessen my task
and still flounder
let me use two instead
uniquely beautiful.

There are times
when life invades
our thoughts
Assuages
our best
intentions
falls away
from who we want to be
There  are times
When life
Shouts louder
Than
Who we set out
originally
desperately
set
out
to
try
to
Be
Sorry

I knew you were okay
when you picked up
the worst bits of me
put them in your pocket
and never
gave them back to  me

I will loosen my hold on you
no questions
no answers
if you will too
imagine
we could both fly free
imagine
the people we could
be

I wonder
if anyone
has ever been
as wrong
about someone
as I have been
about you

we laugh
the loudest
and fall the loudest
and hurt the loudest
and rise the loudest
of anyone I know

I am not who I pretend to be
Although I do it very  well
Don’t you agree?

I joined
a poetry club today
then quickly realised
they were not interested
in anything I had to
say
and more  importantly
in my world
that’s okay .

Listen to me now
I may say same words tomorrow
But not in the same way
Listen to them now
The cadence
The flow
Listen to them now
Their rhyming deep and low
Listen to my words
Beating deeper
Deeper
forever slow

Honesty
I have never been this close
to this amount of pain
and survived

Look at me
I am made of
glass
you may see yourself
but it will pass

It’s a fine thread
Between
Your heart and mine
silken and fine
like rich red wine
don’t break the line
and nor
will I
trust in me
and we will be fine

I have had a missing person alert
out for you
for most of my life
so don’t show up all shiny
this late
without a decent
excuse

the  garnish glittery
golden bits of me
faded effortlessly into
the subtle serious
silver bits of you
smelted for a bit
and became
slowly solid
indestructible undefinably
bronze.

I know the little bits of you
that you hide
very hidden
and safe
and aside
very deeply inside
your very expensive silk
suit pocket

In all truth
I know my life started with you
no one else
has ever made sense of me
quite the way
I needed them
to

You left last night
in a hurry
but you left tiny bits of yourself
scattered
in a bit of a flurry
not sure what to do with them now
seems wrong to sweep them away
still
you were the one who left last night
in a bit of a hurry

I don’t miss you being here
telling me
what to do
I miss you being here
showing me
how to be

Has anyone ever written
an unforgettable poem
a truly unforgettable poem
I can’t remember
can you?

I see you
and every painful step
you take into
your unknown world
I have walked those steps
just a beat before you
just a train ride between us
does the pain ever dim?
Yes
and as a bonus
you’re thin!

We all knew who Thaddeus was
The handsome boy from the wrong side of town
We all knew who Thaddeus was
Sweet of tongue  with an easy smile
We all knew who Thaddeus was
The day the Clement boys came to town
We all knew who Thaddeus was
When he stood in their way
To save young Miss Brown
We all knew who Thaddeus was
When the Clement boys put him in the ground
we all knew our silence would **** him
One way or the other
The Clement boys, Miss Brown
And the rest of us who inhabit
This global town

give me back my smile
I am miserable without it
you took it with you
by mistake
at least
that’s what you said

If I could just
for one minute
truly be myself
and pour me into the world
undiluted
I would poison
everyone I touched
I would ****
the pure
and obscure
I would flood the world
with truth
and pictures
and memories
of their youth

when there was nothing but money
to make
we made it
when there was no love to lose
we lost it
when there was no game to play
we played it
when there was nothing to say
we talked anyway

I’ve just realised
that nobody talks in rhyme
and nobody  walks in time
words are never sublime
nobody told me
nobody said
nobody knew
I care
too much
inside my head

There are about three billion words
on the inside of me
on the outside
Man, they are struggling
to be

if I could
be anyone
in the world
I could be
I would wake up
tomorrow
and be you

I loved our love
the loudness of it
the laughing out loud of it
the easy fit of it
the we’re okay with it
the we didn’t care of it
the boldness of it
the badness of it
the airiness of it
the very sound of it
the endless song of it
the ***** the world of it
the world is ours of it
the very essence of it
the us being us of it
the loving  each other of it
I loved our love
I know you did too
when in world
did it happen
when did the us in us
become the end of us.

I have no words left
Seriously
I used them all up
Before I was three
Now they tell me
Be careful what you say
you are too old now
Be careful what you say
No one told me that
I would use all the free words
up
before
the age of three

Thanks
lovely but
honestly
not  quite enough

Can any one of us
write words that
truly
mean anything
to someone else
or are we destined to
only write words
selfishly
for ourselves

If you love  me
even once in a while
talk me out of this
I am deep into another
mistake

Beautiful
is misinterpreted
everyday
Beautiful
is strived for
everyday
Beautiful
is cried for
everyday
Beautiful
is before you
everyday
Beautiful
is lost to you
everyday
Reach!

You left before me
but
you didn’t take me with
you

I am swimming in a  sea of you
I am drowning in too much of you
I am climbing the Everest of you
I am delving into the deep of you
I am inhaling the worst of you
I am crying for the loss
and the best of you

I’m not so impressed with
the big parts of you
but I am totally and completely
in love
with the little bits of you
the crumbs of you
left scattered on the ground
when the world
decides
it is done with you

When did the
snow
turn into pain?

Oddly I breathe
a little better
smile a little better
wake up a little better
behave a lot less better
am myself a little better
when I am at home
doing better better things
with you

I miss you
every night
everyday
I have spent all night
last night
and most of today
trying to find the right script to slay
no words present themselves
they know how much is at play
I miss you
every night
everyday

Please don’t get lost in
yesterday
join us
celebrate
today

all I want
is to find you
to know you
to be you
to understand you
to hear you
to have space for you
all I want
is for you
to understand me
to find me
to hear me
to know me
have space for me
all I want
is to know you
and for you
to know me too
and then
I think
we would never wage war.

I know you couldn’t leave me
if you tried
You know I couldn’t leave you
if I tried
and so the golden ink
of trying
burns sacred scars
upon our souls.