Merry Christmas guys!
Thank you for the reads in 21
See you in 22!

I believe
this is it
I believe
we got there
I believe
this is enough
I believe
we know
I believe
the scars
won’t show
beneath our clothes
or our eyes
I believe
no-one will  ever hear
our cries

I miss the girl I used to be
she got lost somehow
in between the crying
and the trying
to be the girl
I desperately thought
I needed to be

Beautiful
is misinterpreted
everyday
Beautiful
is strived for
everyday
Beautiful
is cried for
everyday
Beautiful
is before you
everyday
Beautiful
is lost to you
everyday
Reach!

Here’s what I know
for sure
I know that I know
nothing
Are you okay
knowing that you know
nothing
too?

I know
Know this
if you know nothing else
know this
I know
and I think
I probably
always did

she cannot be
who she wants to be
so she spends her day
being who
she is expected
to be.

I started at nine
I left at five
I rarely smiled
There is no exception to the rule
Yes,
life really
can
be that cruel

I will go down with this ship
or die
trying.

Love
it comes
and glows
then disappears
like smoke
upon touch

I might as well
be someone else
for all the authenticity
left inside
of me.

I see you
even now
after these long years
I know you
your tears
always
more visible
than your fears

You are the woman
I always wanted
to be

Let the best of me
fade into the worst
of you
then I believe
honestly
someday
it may become
True

Of all the people
I have ever met
You are probably the
best

When you reigned
you rained tears upon my cheek
fears I could not speak
my mascara
always streaked

I left before
you
that was my only
crime

I am no poet
truth be told
who amongst us is?
I am just rearranging words
to suit my mood

If only the best part
of me
could be a little bit more
like the worse part of you
and you could see that too
then maybe
we could all make
it through

If
I could be a
superpower
I would probably
or maybe
definitely
at least sometimes
if not most times
most likely
I would probably
I guess
I would choose
you
If I could be a
superpower
Yeah
I think I would
probably
maybe
choose
You

I am still here
in the same ‘ol place I have
always been
know it doesn’t quite
look the same
but I am still here
same as it as always been

You are
exactly
where
you deserve
to be

I think
I keep
our love young
Do you?

what I really want to write
are the poems I didn’t write
the poems that I read
deep and profound
what I really want to see
are the things I never see
feelings lost to me
what I really want to write
are the words I didn’t  know
that
I  didn’t know
what I really want to write
are the things
I suspect I may
never know
but I really want to write them
anyhow

I am a book
without words
I am a song
without tune
I am a poem
without rhyme
I am a movie
without sound
I am a play
without plot
I am a painting
without colour
I am a sculpture
without stone
I am a woman
without name.

Sometimes
don’t you think
Life shouts
just a bit too loud
makes its entrance
just a little
too bold
Misses the point
just a little
too often
allows us to sink
just a little
too low
Sometimes
don’t you think?

I wonder
will you ever say that out loud
that which you whispered
so freely in you sleep
last night

She knows all there is to know
and just a little bit more
and yet
she goes to bed
tries to sleep
then realises
she knows
to much awful
to sleep

Let’s dance
all night
let’s dance
all life!

I love you
more than I have words for
so I will hush now
let silence
take the lead
for once.

I am not your
beautiful
anymore

There is nothing in this world
more precious
to me
No metal
No stone
than your voice
on the other end of the phone

No
is a complete sentence
I only
learned that
yesterday
so today
I can say
out loud
no
no
no
and louder
No
No
JUST NO

I don’t know how to say the words
I want to say
so I offer you
these three million
that I should never say

and in the blink of an eye
we lived
that  same old lie

Evening falls like navy blue silk
sublimely gentle
upon our skin
Touching gently
the person within
Seeking answers
we could never
Begin

This is nice
I said
this is love
he said
No,
this just nice like
I said

Can we
hang on
can we
be good
can we
hold on
can we
be strong
can we
breathe on
can we
feel on
can we
live on
can we
against the odds
still believe
can we
still  breathe
on?

there must be something terribly
wrong with me
the song said
I agreed
and
promptly went to bed.

Do not drip feed me
your love
drown me in emotion
and over the top words
scare me with honesty
and silence

Do you recall when love was lost?
not too sure myself
that country weekend with friends
comes to mind
we left the lovely pub to walk home
everyone was jolly
the route was dark but not for the first time
to the idilic cottage
with the lamps on
just before we went in you said
hang on
have I forgotten something
I’m missing something
for sure
were you missing her
I was.

I see you
in all honesty
it’s murky
but if I move slightly
to the right
and squint my eyes
I think
I see you
albeit
slightly a
a bit too much
to the right.

You will so soon
be in the place of your dreams
you will lay your head
exactly where you schemed
your struggle
will be forgotten
your journey
ill begotten

Tomorrow is such a different
world
away
from me
and you
tonight

Look at your father
laugh a bit
if you will
but know this
if you know nothing else
ever
as long as you live
this
is the purest
most honest
love
you
for the rest
of your life
will ever
know!

I knew lots of things
before I met you
Yet
day by day
hour by hour
minute by minute
second by second
they all left me
bled out of me
day by day
hour by hour
minute by minute
second by second
until eventually
I was just left
with me
and me.

Well done!
You won
You got me
Bullseye!
arrow
straight through
my heart.

This wasn’t a win
but it wasn’t a fail
we didn’t **** each other
no one’s in jail

Light a light for me
I will see it
eventually