I am so lonely, so tired of sleeping alone
I want to be wanted, not used and disposed
Sick of feeling like guys only want me to fulfill their needs
Lies and decent
What is the point of trying to find LOVe
When all I seem to find is the ones that
Just need a piece of *** or are wearing a mask
Soon it will all be revealed
Pushed out of their minds didn't even phase them
A waste of time...

Your curls
Your laugh
That smile so sweet
Your heart is huge
And those tiny ties
The way you love
The way you hug
The way you smell
too Presious
Such innocence

I'm so very  sorry ..
I can't be in your life
I made mistakes
I broke your little heart
I need your hugs
I can't seem to breathe
Tears flow down my cheeks
Remembering you
I'm sad it's true
Your six years old
Heart pure  as gold
The love that don't grow old
I miss you everyday in everyway..
March 17th 2015
They took u away for good
Now I'm sad n blue
I hope u know that I still  love you eternally unconditionall
Forever
My sweet angel

Without U my world is blue
My heart is restricted
My eyes are damp
My joy is gone
I'm a broken disgrace.

You were the light in life
The smile on my face the
Beat of my heart
Now all I hAve is this
Pain.

Pain to get up and live another day
Sad and depressed in every single way.
Nothing  is ever going to be the same
I gave up on life in a way.

My purpose in life is gone
My energy to try isn't there
I don't seem to even remotely care
I haven't even brushed my hair.

I miss you smell
I miss watching you sleep
I miss your laugh
And your cute tiny feet.

Why did I lose control
Why do people offer to help
When the truth is their robbing  the innocence of our souls
Signing away their life

I wish I could rewind time
Go back and be more wise
To open my *******  eyes
Only that can't happen
I'm empty inside

I would rather be dead than alive
Being  a mommy  was the only thing  I ever wanted
Now I'm a worthless  piece of garbage
Take me out when u take out the trash
I might as well be thrown out on my ***.

I want to
curl up into a ball
I want to give up on life
And cry.. even  bawl
Throw everything I own at a wall
Disappear and all.

Why do people only use me?

Zillions of tweaking bums
Sitting here and there some are rambling non stop
Others are rolling  the glass ****
Or WITH a rig in their,arm

Sometimes you see a few tweakers
Staring at the the pipe begging
With crocodile tears these we all know as fiends
Drama fills the little shack
Stolen electronics array and ***** needles in every trash can.. as well is outside  on  the ground
Sad and pitiful

Scary things that reek havoc
In my life seem to form in a instance
Not giving me a  chance to seek a place to hide

My heart is breaking
My hands are shaking
Mentally naked

Everything begins to cave in
Melting my ways to seem whole
Deluding my positive mind
Narrowing  my  choices
Reasons to write a knowledge
I know that  saved  my soul
To have in me the power to grow
Stronger a pen and paper
Make me feel really great
Now I don't have to worry about
Leaving my life without being remembered as the caterpillar
That turned her sadness into muticolored life .. now a butterfly
To fly away from the scary things

Injecting magic into my veins
It's a  little bit like playing with fire
The monsters come out
They seek and find ways to
Poison your thoughts
And make you distraught
Awake but not in reality