Famous ,5am poem

canned thunder
lofi beats
Snoring cat
Blender upstairs
Fat raccoon
eating larded trash
Moon is full
Rain is wet
Grass is cut
Window is open
Eyes are heavy
Nowhere to go
Still trying to dream
See you
when we wake
up


j

i hope i die in my sleep


  
  I hope i feel
      the calm
Breeze as i slip away
Into benign
      acceptance

So quiet
She wipes away my
   Tears

The sale extends until wednesday.
Many styles in women's sunglasses

pitched
by pigs and cold coffee.

**** it dry,
my coffee is black
and it needs spice.

fly at night, too many crowds and too many lines. explosions in soft places; roll around a tight hall--- 2 green lights go woo


I love good
juice,
praying to a fine specimen called tomorrow .  open your
*******
eyes

staring into a blank field and breaking my promise

the noise drips into my shell, waves like shallow graves

anxiety clutching me
And sweat beads

too hot
For covers too cold
For the ****

release
the pain and

Release me
Release

me
into nothing

So so so so  close.
I pull up the covers and yawn. I think about nothing. I brush my teeth and I cry and look into the mirror. So so so so so ugly so fast. The snow is falling and the tiles are cracking. I smile and go back to bed. If I die at least no one will be sad

Like a rothko.

Blue over white

Black stretched over red and crimson
light
bleeding

The air is hot and heavy

The walls are quiet in the morning

The fragments of ash
spill into
the noon

The violins sound for the dove

The canvass stands stoic amongst glazed over eyes in the lobby

And in the dawn there is nothing left to mourn

The painting was finished

My back hurts real bad
she called me to tell me she doesn't wanna talk

I ate a serving of rice
& A pepperoni
Condensed
Grape
substrate

My eyes hurt
I bleed in my gums
I *** a lot

I watch a show about lengthy dogs
Pick up your watch
Leave me alone
Leave me alone

Dont

It's 4:10  and the crack heads are awaking.
The streetcar rolls down the street and slithers in rust,
The ragged gypsy prepares her pajamas, the innocent nun
folds her silk white underwear and stares at the morning sun,
The alcoholic collapses in the dirt,
The satanist cries with a teddy bear, the transgender watches SpongeBob,
The child plays with grass,
The ****** eats stilts,
The dog dances in carpet,
The god praises
Jehovah
All lights illuminate,
And the crowds are transfixed. It's a communion
Of liars and all will be hungry
What a shame,       What a
waste
At least we have prayer

If I left now, what would be left

Just thoughts and hopes
Nightmares and smoke
Fragments of a form
Locust winds
Faint cathedrals
Blue mountains
And withered sinew

All decadent
All destined to die

If there are no mistakes in art
Then there are no mistakes in
life

let it go

It is no measure of health to be well-adjusted to a profoundly sick society

I have that stapled on my wall,
   above my drawing of a cat.
  and I feel no better, I sometimes wish I was well-adjusted. life would be easier being
empty

Nuclear armagedden would have been preferable
I always wanted to be a steaming skeleton
And I always wanted to go blind by beauty inconceivable

2 + 2
= 5

But it's a matter of opinion.




Who's to say how dark is the night
When it's merely a shade

There is no Reason

Want to paint a sky black with raining tethers and laughing babies heads
Whilst sleeping In solar plains

Want to pluck the eyes from angels and **** chariot
virgins

And dance with cool emotion

Dusted off disgraces
among favored beggars

We can only do so much
Im tired of doing so little.

I can't look anymore all

All I see are dead lizards and gaping holes



The lonely watchman takes his drag; what was your name

Grace

All goodbyes take time,

swinging
into a doorway,
the critter is unmaimed.
I miss
    my mother

This is a song about nothing
About crying outside

About dying tomorrow
And making a mess

You've got a face like a sun
And a body like a bent
Stem


Hold you close so you don't fall with the crowd

I'm running late now and seeking another
Appointment
Dead souls for the way we forget

A song about nothing
Can't even rhyme
I forged a ticket
And spat out an idol


Don't say you want me
When you wanted an excuse

I put her back in her box, and tuck her under the bed and she doesnt even cry

But I'd have to pay for it. And I wouldnt mind. I stopped caring about what's 'real' anymore. This pain is real enough

I want to write a sincere poem but maybe I've lost my way.
I keep thinking of the way it needs to resolve at the end
to make it seem more meaningful than it is,
like a clever line which ultimately
isn't that interesting nor profound,
just esoteric. It's supposed to be meaningless I guess, like
everything else.

You paint your face with shadows and protest to a benevolent spirit.
All you have is
nothing, go dance in the
flame

I cut an apple blossom from the tree
and laid it out for her,
there was still some pollen residue on it and the branches were shaking from the wind.

she saw it and smiled, and I knew It was better than any of the cards.
be real,
don't try

it's been quiet lately    so I just  listen

I could travel 100000 miles spanning all continents meeting countless people and encountering numerous obstacles and happenings but I'd ultimately still be stuck with myself.
Maybe that's why the wanderlust wore off.
You cant run from yourself, but merely distract yourself.
Sitting feels like dying but traveling feels like futility to reach a destination of which you never arrive.
But i keep searching nonetheless. Maybe the trick is killing yourself.
metaphorically of course. Complete detachment, dissolving into space like a
Low murmur

liquefied time and the absense of material location.

I'll still be there.

I'll still be here

This is a long year and i've become nocturnal.
I have no routine
but i stick to my lifts.

2020

I had the vision but not the
Insight

With a person you hate and wishing they were dead. And when they go to the bathroom the toilet flush is an agonizing disturbance, and their footsteps like trampling on your mother's grave. You want out, but theyre there and they know you hate it, and you want to sleep without their warmth. What once was comforting is now suffocating, their reassurance and notion of love, cruelty.
You want out, out, out ,out, out onto a dead field with no rose and no shine, just like you always imagined, just like your dreams

I write for the likes
Just being honest. I'm a lab rat suckling on the nectar from tubes. Acknowledge me
I have no life, the bean pellets taste like corn and the frothy soup has been digested along with the ham.

Sitting through 6 hours of pawn stores I have found
God
In a motor home

I'm not a romantic poet and it kind of bums me out.
  no chick would ever
read my stuff and fantasize about me;
  I don't even have a gnarled hideous face so as to be poetic.
I'm just whatever, with no real vices, no alcoholism, drug abuse,
  or abuse otherwise.
     I am a little ****** up,  but so is everyone. that's a prerequisite to living.
  
    and living is getting old

Changes in season
Like a bleeding
Clown

Flipped in a magazine circling the afro haircut radio specimen of latitude

Hairy ****, at 2mm shaving device.
I arrest her like a poolboy bowling pin

Sorry for hurting you physically
I don't know what I'm doing
I'm still a dumb kid even though I'm 25,
Not to absolve me of Blame but I'm dumb

I'm really dumb 8(5) = 40
Took me 3 seconds.  Pain is so so so so so so so so so so so sensual that's why it hurts

of all  the times you sit across the window  and stare and the soil with  half a glass  of milk
the precious moon like a stone     not listening
but weeping

Some 60 year old ****** with no teeth offered me a ******* for my pack of cigarettes.
I just gave her the pack and said
"Thank you, but I'm alright".
I picked up my brother at the next block.
There is no light

This is not for you

This is not for your ears.


Hide away in the cellar

Play mercy

And ragtime witch pop.

We drag our sins across looming

Seas.
9p00

I think it's good
a motivation
1000 days of life
changed. It's still rainbows
deal with it. God blessed

tubes
has been what works best
reminding of myself reminds my brain leading to a relapse several times eventually with good habits
consciously thinking and
Truly integrated

your life.
Planted rose, carcass and soon
0

I don't count the page.
Folded in numbers, frail and benign
Look to see what you've written
And what really matter s

Threw my phone against the wall and it shattered in a million pieces. then I threw the rest in the pond and let the frogs eat the battery and SIM card. You can have it; & I've never slept better. I even read a ******* book.  That's different - & I didn't even miss
anyone -- in fact I realized how much I hated being available to everyone and anyone at all hours. but I don't mind the dark-
it's nice and cool here

it hurts

so much there's a tear in this heart

So much the claws come clawing

So much

the knees dont bend



So much the surprise is apathy and the face is demented like rot on a lung



I hang my head inside. I wrap up the good ones who wont go. Free as ever.

- you

put on this planet to suffer, there's no poetry in the silence.
  just an aching like a broken clock and a heart which
slowly
rusts

Time goes by so fast and you howl and breathe like a ***** beast
What once was 2 years is now 5 and what was once 5 is 10
And before you know it what was once cute and endearing at 16
Is now Strange and immature at 24
I didn't ask for this
I wanted to be eternal, I wanted to be timeless
And thats why they all die at 27 and I'm nearly there.
No one will bury me
I'll be scattered ash for daises, while the tombstones all read prayers

Kodak blue
visions in a submarine den cottage with pink paper
The fan will whisk her away but so will the vines.
If it goes so do my ears now vibrating in salacious hum, doldrum metal aluminum scream

I found you like a child in the space under the stairs
What happened of your smile once so
pearly?

Not really a poem, but I just want to throw everything away and start a life in nature and live among people who love and understand me and who I can work with to achieve in that setting.
Simplicity.
Food needs met
Water needs met
Shelter
And finally love with no distractions

Because I don't remember how to be human. I'm always looking elsewhere. I want to be here with them. I want to be here with you. I can't make it on my own

but she talks to me like a *******
man bro.
she'll get what she wants.
she wants to bury me, and I'll
let
her

so many ****** poems

if these words are as bored as I feel then I may as well
just set them on fire.

horrendous - read a cook or cookbook. 2 cups of sugars per serving of steak,
we walk along corridors of blood and sewage,
and we pray
to gods that wish for our demise.
laugh if you want
it's a little funny

On a wall
Dripping down blue ribbons like a noose, your hand outstretched and cadavers leaking on a table
Squeeze the pus from the wound and consume ***** dogs
Names etched in sand with no purpose

I drank some water just now and I watched a movie
My plants are cold and now it's dead.
See something between these lines because I genuinely don't know anymore
Nothing really matters does it
?

Blew me away pressed
My face to the wall
Shattered my lungs with a blow and
Danced on the street
Syrupy kisses
And black
Lunges

The equals had a name and they sang hallelujah
I'll be there

Hallelujah I'll be there.
.
..

Wrinkled bags and gelatinous
comfort

How was it then

How was it when gods sang to

swine?

I've died a thousand times
And made my bed a thousand times and attended funerals a thousand times and swam in green oceans a thousand times and juggled swords a thousand times
And paraded along silk streets a thousand times
And witnessed births a thousand times
And seen splattered remains a thousand times
And talked to ghosts a thousand times
And worn grey canvass potato bags a thousand times with Gucci slip ons in Georgia and I have ultimately learned nothing
Maybe next time

She says I "can't change"

The stuff she wants me to fix is superficial like buying flowers and spending more money on dates.

If that's her measure of love whilst disregarding all the ways I helped her and loved her unconditionally what the **** am I hanging on for?

It's just a shallow justification for her *******, considering she already 'moved on' with another guy a week after our break up

when it's over it's over
and it dies
  months before you even knew it.
women are nature's best actors

because someone tells you something is a fact

prevention is more affordable
than treatment
dubiously related: the medical field

Older doesn't always mean wise
the importance of getting 7-9hrs of sleep every single night.

Human memory is extremely unreliable.
fabricate memories
conform to our biases

revolve around photograph

gender of the people doing the ignoring
*55555

feed a cat

If you will

Well I must
If you insist

I insist
Good oysters they say?
Yes indeed
Gosh these oysters are fine
Yish

What goes in goes in
read your head
and comb your eyeballs and place your ***** in a candy box
and lament james dean
drinking orangecream.
  The lost souls of yore
stand on battalions of gods;
honing
in a circular
provisional
and blinking past none.  Their time would come, just not
now
just not now

a dead mangled up bobcat with its head sqaushed in and brains seeping out of its eye in a patch of dirt on the mossy hill,

The bones will be clean within a week. Death doesn't care, we just get in the way