Talk to me
Come see me
Touch me
And flirt with me
Tell me no
But show me yes
Tell me never
But show me forever
Give me feelings
Revive me
Tell me tomorrow
Or friday
Maybe we'll stitch it up
Sometime soon someday
But i'll take what i can get
Because i just want
To spend the rest of my life
With you in some way

I am the enemy
I can't get out
Of my own way
I am after blood
And sweat and tears
My metallic red blood
And my sad tears
I constantly hurt myself
Every chance I get
If now is it
I speak the truth
Two more short lines
With four more words
Words only for you:
I'm winning the battle
The battle with myself.

And one more thing
Although you physically cannot,
You can trust me

Angel I can see myself in your eyes
Angel won't you feel for me from your heart
Do return my heart to me
No don't insist I'm already hurt

Elephant girl
It was an accident unfortunate
Angel threw me like a rubber man
Aiming for the ground
Why amuse yourself in such way
No don't insist I'm already hurt

Lay me down on the ground softly softly
Don't remove my head, hurts much too much

You never return it
Well I wouldn't miss it
I shed no tears for broken me
You never know it, my peace of mind
Now inside and outside are matching

Why amuse yourself in such a way
No don't insist I'm already hurt
If you never return it
Will it break your wings
Will you shed no tear for broken me

If several hymns were sung
Making the world spin, might,
Even one,
Have rung for you and I?
I hope it is the case and,
I do wish it were true,
That I can
Give my heart just to you

It's 9:30
Gotta count down my drawer
And I think of you
Put in the code
So the safe can be opened
In 9 or so minutes
And I think of you
Put the key in
"No sale," "giving change"
Take out the drawer
Go in the office
Ending till for ALEX OLD
And I think of you
$0.00 over/short
Perfect night
Just like perfect you
And I think of you
Open the safe, get the money
Change it out for higher bills
By the time i'm done,
It's closing time
Buy my things and she buys hers
Count down her drawer
And I think of you
Her drawer is $3.83 short
Wonder what went wrong
And how much I'll be blamed
Ignore the consequences
And I think of you
Count the change fund
So many ones
Forgot the change fund worksheet
Count it again
Then like every night
Something goes wrong
Pick up the pieces
Learn from the mistake
And I think of you
Count the deposit
$1426.22, plus a check
Which was $60.60
So $1486.82
Over and over again
$1486.82
And I think of you
She and I pick up my mess
Of cardboard
And get out
Set the alarm, close the door,
Put in the key, twist
"Clink"
Drop it under the mat
Walk to our cars
She tells me a story
About a boy riding a bike
And I think of you
Get into my car
And think of the 29th
And I think of you
And I text you
And despite my pessimism,
You text back
But you forgot about the 29th
And I'll doubt it means much to you anyway

But I'll celebrate regardless
And I'll think of you

What is it like?
I have no recollection
Ever of being wanted
No love has come my way
My vision is a collage of mirage.

And there are waking moments
But I prefer those less
Whenever I tell her truths
Cross my fingers and confess
She shakes her head and
I can see her struggle
Feelings and emotions
And her trust to juggle
Then there are sleeping moments
And I prefer those more
When I imagine her only
And my heart is not sore
I talk to her and laugh with her
Love her, make love with her
So far away from everything
That made her will wither
But again there are waking moments
And I have to make a decision
Wait and try and dream,
Give up and make an incision,
Leave and agonize in misery,
Or create a new fire
With so much time,
It feels as if the present is dire

I want the future
To find me now
But what do I want?
Hello or meow?

Cried out, to me alone
What's in you? Throw me a bone
Oh life, what did you know?
How do I ever decide?

Careful love, blow it away
Let's go there, what do you say?
Oh life, why did I wait
How do I get to the sky?

Called out, to me alone
What made you? Maybe you know
Oh life, let it all go
How do I get to the sky?

I will never forget
How they treated me
After I did everything
To show how much I care
I tried so hard
And I see zero effort
From them

I know nothing more than you...

It’s more than on occasion
I wish I were dead
Never an invitation
To be deserted instead

Hate it when I know
And I don't know
Same time

I am what I said
I meant what I said
But I don't know
What I just said

Hate it when I know
And I don't know
Same time

I always thought
I wasn't brave enough
To **** myself

Now i realize
I just hadn't lost
Anything worth killing myself over

Now i have. I'm sorry

Someday, I’ll drown
In my memories.

You've made me so happy
Happier than i could ever ask for
You're the sweetest
In my eyes
I love everything about you
But you've confused me
You've confused me and,
Hurt me for the last time
I think
So when i'm gone
Far too soon
Before or after my time
Whichever you think
Because your opinion is the truth
I believe that to be so
And you wonder how to get by
How you can get past it all
Try to remember this:

I'll just be waiting here
Patiently
Waiting for you to join me
Then we can spend some more time together

You know when you find someone
Who is the most perfect person
For you

And you know this is true
Immediately, know what they mean
To you

They have all of the qualities you need
In a person, you want them forever
With you

So it begins
And so it ends
The secrets of the day
It all depends
Careful morning
Hectic dawn
Measuring ingredients
Tastefully drawn
Fitting shoes
Making do
What we use
Getting through
Just preparation
Never early
Lucid planning
Going surely
Talking of days
Long before
Talking of days
When we won’t be poor
Sitting, singing
Awkward distance
Mindless thinking
Mindful assistance
Arbitrary sadness
Arbitrary stress
Arbitrary madness
Arbitrary mess
Exchanging a look
Long overdue
Labeling the tag
From me to you

The secrets of the day
It all depends
So it begins
And so it ends

The more hopeless it seems,
The more hopeful I get.
The more hopeful I seem,
The more hopeless it gets.

I feel like Bob in the Rain
There is no Lizard of Hope
I'm gone
From my body at least
I appear here now
But my body has no mind
No moral compass
It operates without me
My mind is in this writing
It's in the unconscious decisions
"I hate it when I know and I don't know.
Same time"
It all was a game
It isn't as if I was ever unaware
I always knew
The magnitude is different
Every time, I give up on humanity
And every time, I somehow find hope
This time certainly seems different
It's the end of something.

It’s airplane mode for me
When you’re not near
I plan to weep
But you’ll never appear

I can look back
At least
At the good things
And smile
I know I can't
Be mad
I just hate it
This way
Why does it have
To end?
Does it have to?
Not now
If I can help,
Not now

What do I deserve?
Death?
Well obviously
Suicide?
Certainly that
Torturing myself
In unimaginable ways
Until I die of just too much pain?
More than that really
I deserve to lose the woman
That I love most in the world
That's the worst thing
That can happen to me
I deserve it
But i'd rather have to do
The other things

You
You make them here
My emotions
They appear
That
That's what I fear
The mixed emotions
The feelings that you hear
You hear the tears
You can hear the fear
My mind is gone
It's gone
It's gone
It's gone

We say
It's
All
So
Fun
But we must run
It's done
You
And
I
Are
Are love
Our love

Never
Get through to
The feeling
Inside you
It's ever
Conforming
As I
Get closer to
Everything
You are
You are
Leaving
And all
My memories are
Crowding my
Eyes
Eyes
Eyes

Our love

Hidden in the darkness
Tremble beneath the mark
Of their words
Drive out on a monday
Meet you on a sunday
Then the sun turns

Please don’t wait
There’s no hate
But it’s a long road yet
No more talk
And no mock
Not a sign of regret

But the moon shines bright
In a darkened sky
A hollowed tree whistles
When the wind blows right
Walk with me one more night

Weathering the darkness
Waiting to embark
It’s a curse
Killing time with kindness
Her company was timeless
Then the sun turns

Please don’t wait
There’s no hate
But it’s long road yet
No more talk
And no mock
Not a sign of regret

But the moon shines bright
In a darkened sky
A hollowed tree whistles
When the wind blows right

Walk with me one more night
Dance with the shadows in the moonlight
Walk with me one more night

That scream continues to haunt me
It brings me to my knees
The tears, the broken heart, the shout
"Go...please! Just please...get out!"

Flying solo
So close to the sun
Though I care not
For, what I want
Is to see the light
One last time
Before the end
When darkness
Overpowers me

The slow dive
Below the surface of the night
An undertone
The moonlight
A flaming ember reignites
And blows out cold
I'm barely holding on
You were the only one
You were the only one

And no wonder
I couldn't see it before
I just didn't realize
How much she loved me
If i lived again
From before when i broke
I like to think i could avoid
Making the same mistakes
But something i've been learning
Is that we'll always make those decisions
No matter how many do-overs we get
It's what keeps us from improving the past

I'm bitter now
Bitter and torn
Because I can't
Protect you anymore

Did your metaphorical skull get bashed in and bleed
By those who you always assumed were after your hopes and dreams?

Please,
Take me by storm
**** me by hand,
Just not over the phone
The silence is much too much

Please,
Take me by surprise
Respond to me once,
And I’ll be so happy
It’s all I really want

Please,
Take me by the hand
Show me what you want,
The things you love
And what you adore

Please,
Take me by storm,
Take me by the hand,
Take me by surprise
Just please, take me if you can

Take me far away with you
Because I am done with this land

There’s only one way
I can keep from ******* up
Ever again.

Sometimes the world makes me feel
Like I never existed
And I existed
When she was laughing...

Oh, that magic feeling
Nowhere to go

I want a love that’s right
Right is only half of what’s wrong
I want a short-haired girl
Who sometimes wears it twice as long
Now I’m stepping out this old brown shoe
Yeah, and I’m in love with you
I’m so glad you came here
It won’t be the same now I’m telling you
Although you pick me up
From where some try to drag me down
When I see your smile
Replacing every thoughtless frown
You got me escaping from this zoo
Baby, I’m in love with you
I’m so glad you came here
It won’t be the same now that I’m with you

If I grow up, I’ll be a singer
Wearing rings on every finger
Not worrying what they or you’ll say
I’ll live and love and maybe someday
Who knows baby
You may comfort me

I want a love that’s yours
To miss that love is something I’d hate
I’ll get an early start
In making sure that I’m not late
For your sweet top lip I’m in the queue
Baby, I’m in love with you
I’m so glad you came here
It won’t be the same now that I’m with you
I’m so glad you came here
It won’t be the same now I’m telling you

I may appear to be imperfect
My love is something you can’t reject
I’m changing faster than the weather
If you and me should get together
Who knows baby
You may comfort me

Dearly beloved,
We are gathered here today
To misplace our faith
To live in all things through a god
That we’re not even sure exists
And to make a pledge
That needs not be made

Give a ring
Take a breath
Forgive and forget
Pledge your life away

Talks over liquids
Intoxicating group
My awkwardness
Unheard of
Endless silent loop
On the other side
I think of 5 years ago
Top of red
Metal teeth
Happiness i'd never know
Finally, April
Future will see
Constantly
Harrowing
Sorrow for me

When you shout
It hurts my ears
I close my eyes
And gritt my teeth
Not for the volume
I’ll handle that
But for the tone,
The aggression underneath

Please be calm
I’m a fragile heart
Your sound waves ripple
And rip me apart

The day will come
All the lives are gone
You came to me
A knife between your legs
When you scream
The earth shakes of fear
I don’t know what you said
But something’s horribly wrong
The knife behind your back
Tells me nothing to say
You fell, you died
I screamed, and cried
And carried you away
There we lied
Finally awake

The Razorblade
That's what I call love
I bet you'd pick it up
And mess around with it
If I put it down
It gets extremely complicated
Anything to forget everything

Got to take me out
At least once a week
Whether I'm in your arms
Or I'm at your feet
I know exactly what you're thinking
You won't say it now,
But in your heart it's loud

Oh no, my feelings are more important than yours
Drop dead, I don't care, I won't worry

Oh the Razorblade
Wish it would snap this rope
World is in your hand
Or it's at your throat
At times it's not that complicated
Anything to forget everything

He would never talk
But he was not shy
She was a street smart girl
But she cannot lie
They were perfect for each other
Say it now, 'cause in your heart it's love

Oh no, my feelings are more important than yours
Drop dead, I don't care, I won't worry

Sweet one,
Your feelings are more important
Of course
OF COURSE

Whoops I od'd,
Shortness of breath,
Call ambulance,
Tell my wife I—
Error in judge—-
—-ment cut my life,
No second chance
No guiding light
I never meant
To cause you pain
I never thought I'd be the one who took the fall
I got lost in the moment,
******* like to test the limit
Six minutes down,
Breathing  machine,
Brain not feel right
The look on you
Is killing me,
Drowning in shame
But don't feel bad,
Cause I
Never feared consequences
Hate regrets more than apologies
A year has passed,
Like photographs, my life is just
A scrapbook of
Old friends and faded memories
Looks like I pulled the rug from under myself
The falls too much for me to recover from
It's been real fun
But now I must say goodbye,
I'll see you all at okie dogs
See you all at okie dogs

I'm so in love with you
That I act like you
When I am alone
Because I can't stand
To be without you

She rubs her eyes
Like a child would
"I'm a sleepy girl"
"Hm, I know you are"
"But I don't wanna go to sleep!"
She pouts, then she smiles
And then she sleeps
Precious as the day I first saw her.

When it rains,
It doesn't always storm
That's only one way to put it
But it's perfect
So yes, we're falling down
But don't give up yet, my love
Because we haven't hit the ground
I will catch you
And we'll hit it running
Just let go,
Close your eyes,
Trust me,
Please!
And don't fear
We'll be okay
I promise
You're in good arms
The only sure arms

Nothing is ever as bad as it seems

Because nothing is as bad as losing the girl of my dreams

I woke, and saw death
I smelled death
I tasted death
I heard death
I felt death...

And for what little hope I had...

Now I am covered in death

The moment I believe I’m not alone
I am fooled
I feel like a fool
I commit suicide
I see nothing but blood
Then I see nothing.
Blackness
For what feels like eternity
I see nothing.
Then I see identities.
Not people
Not physical entities
I see remnants of souls
Ones that have left this world
Crying
Fighting their eternal destiny
Then I see light
Blinding
Then I see the morning sun
I dreamt the glory
Of leaving this life

Anymore, again
Seldom do I scare
For, the moment, then
I just don't care
Like roadkill, still
Wariness is absent
Taunting will
Having rent spent
Look toward the Robin
For life living advice
My head throbbin'
But his voice, reminds me my vice

I’ll dissolve in the end
I’ll turn to dust and
Blow away in the wind
My emotions like sand
I’ve never had a real friend.